I must be crazy, Cartman thought to himself. I must be completely nuts.
He continued to climb the tree heading towards his destiny.
I could turn around, climb down the tree and run home to bed like a good little boy, he thought.
But he didn't stop climbing the tree. Before long, he was at the window to Kyle's bedroom. Thankfully, it was open so all he had to do was cut the screen. No big deal; he had been prepared for this. Taking an awful risk, Cartman began to walk slowly toward the window on a fragile tree branch; it shook violently under his weight. Finally, he reached the end of the branch, which was only inches from the window. He grabbed the scissors he packed from under his hat and began to cut through the window screen. Fortunately it didn't take long.
As soon as the hole in the screen was large enough for him to get through, Cartman stopped cutting and slipped into Kyle's bedroom. He fell onto the bed with a thud, but Kyle didn't wake up.
Kyle.
Cartman looked at the sleeping beauty that would soon be his.
"Kyle Kyle Kyle," he said softly. "These past 6 years I've wanted you more then anything else, but you haven't gotten the message. I've done everything i can think of to make you attracted to me, even asking you to suck my balls, but you never wanted to do anything sexual with me. But soon," he said with an evil grin, "soon you'll have no choice."
He proceeded to pull his backpack off his back and began to rummage through the bag. He found the three key ingredients in making his abduction of Kyle Broflovski a success:
1. Steel handcuffs
2. Ether
3. Duct tape
He sprayed the ether into Kyle's face. Since he was already asleep, his emotions didn't really change. He then proceeded to turn Kyle over, put the handcuffs on his wrist, and locked them. To be safe, he also stuck a pair on Kyle's feet. Then, in case he hadn't used the ether properly, he also put duct tape over his mouth. Genius.
Now came the hard part. Getting Kyle out of his bedroom and down the tree.