Switch UP

I've never really been too fond about what I had to do in life. Probably because I was too secluded away from any form of family or friendly bonding with anyone, but I never really minded that. Whenever I decided to entertain myself, whether it be through shows, video games or whatever I could get my hands on, it felt like a waste of time after the hour long binging and grinding when I finished, but it was fun so I never really minded it. Which really sucked. I'm always telling myself I'll hang out with my few friends later, or I'll do the chores later, but I never really got to doing it around.

And the regrets just kept piling, and piling, and piling. Just a never ending cycle of stress and procrastination, which got me thinking: would anyone ever really cry if I died? That type of morbid thought never really got around to me, because my friends always considered me to be upbeat and happy. I could only hope that my friends or my family would cry for me, but I remembered vividly that I didn't cry whenever someone close to me would die. Whenever the news of someone's loved one passed away or someone disappeared, I just lived my motto, "live and let live." It didn't really affect me at the time, but after some deep thought I would think, "Man, I really won't ever see that person ever again." Which gave me a small, shrinking feeling that my life is really small and insignificant. So my thought process is: since I didn't have too many feelings if someone died, why should my family or friends care?

I wasn't necessarily a bad person too. I don't think I'm a psychopath, it's just that I'm haven't grown too attached to that person. So that's one of the problems I back then really wanted to fix. Be more attached to people, and have them be more attached to me. To the point where if I did disappear, they'll cry for me. I just can't stand the thought of no one missing me…

I called one of my few friends Nick Buchanan to ask if I could come over to his house. He said sure, but to let him clean up a little bit. I met Nick back in my elementary school, and stuck with him for nearly my entire life. His parents are well acquainted with my parents, as they used to go to college together. I gave his parents the nickname "Mom" and "Dad" because when I was a younger less coherent version of myself, I just called any pair my mother or father. The names stuck so I didn't bother to change it.

I walked down the Memory Lane, and arrived at the moderately sized house ahead of me. I rung the doorbell and solemnly waited for the arrival of my polite and proper friend.

"I told you to wait asshole, I'm still cleaning my room."

"Eh, whatever. I'll have to wait forever for you to clean your room."

It wasn't necessarily because Nick's room was a pigsty or anything, he was just the biggest neat freak known to man. If I could describe Nick, he'd be the color white. Cleanliness, purity, and holiness is his motto. Keep everything in check. I'm probably be the complete opposite of that.

"Ugh. Fine. I've got something to show cool to show you anyways. I got it from my Uncle Alan. Remember how I told you last week he came back from Africa? He got me a pretty cool souvenir from one of the indigenous tribes he worked with. Apprentally, the totem he got from them can grant a wish to the user."

I looked at Nick's pale face with a skeptical expression. There's no way he believes this right?

"Do you believe it?"

"Nah, not really. That was the small back story behind it, but Alan gave me instructions on how to make a wish. I kinda want to try it. Never hurts to try right?"

"Ok, try it then."

Nick led me up the coffee colored stairs into his room. What a sight to behold. A small screen TV stood their on his drawer in front of his double-sized bed. Everything was in order with his collection of toys and figurines sitting next to his lamp stand. The window heated up his room which warmed up his very, very cold house. It felt like a meat locker when I entered through the front door.

Nick went to the oddly conspicuous totem standing atop his well made bed. He beckoned me to come over, which I obliged and sat on the floor. He took out a papyrus parchment paper and read aloud the writings on it.

"So first, we need two volunteers to put their hands on it, then we need the person who was gifted the totem to yell their wish."

"Your parents aren't home right? Mom and Dad will think we came out of the closet or something."

"Dad's at work, and Mom's grocery shopping. Don't get your fantasies stuck in your hand now buddy."

"How come only you get the wish though. That's kinda unfair for the other volunteer."

"Well you don't believe it right? So might as well use you."

"Ok. But you better buy me food or something, we can't just leave it like that after you wish never ending fortune."

"Whaaat? If it doesn't come true I won't buy you anything. Just get it started, the instructions are easy enough."

There has to be a catch for wishing anything you want right? It shouldn't be that easy to end world hunger, or finding the cure for cancer, or having a deep amount of knowledge at your disposal. Hell, you could even wish for never ending wishes. That's OP dog.

I put my hand on the opposite side of the totem Nick was holding, and Nick said his incantation.

"I want a girlfriend who has been with me all my life."

"Dude you suck at giving wishes."

No response. I looked around the totem to reveal a frozen Nick staring blankly into space.

"Ok dude, you don't have to prank me like that."

I gave him a weak hit on his shoulder, but ended up hurting myself more than Nick. Huh? I grasped his clothes, but they didn't move a single inch. I started panicking wondering what was happening to me. My eyes slowly went to the totem, and wondered what his wish had to do with anything. The totem started shining right before my eyes, blinding me from seeing anything. I started thrashing around trying to feel anything, however it's like the bright light blinded even my senses too.

I don't know how long I waited, but minutes seem like hours whenever you just wait. As the shining dimmed just a little, I opened my eyes to see myself back at my room. I got up dazed and confused, wondering how I even teleported back here. I got up, contemplating why everything was a little bigger. I could usually reach the top of the shelf in my room for clothes, but now I'm stretching to reach even the board.

I walked around some more, and looked into the full body mirror. I looked very very young and feminine. Dirty thoughts came into my head as I was deciding whether or not to check my underwear, but it couldn't be helped. My hand slowly exposed my lower half, which to my unpleasant surprise, revealed a female's genitals.

"EHHH!?"