AN - this story is set in the mirror!universe. Established relationship with Leonard and Christine. He has a child with Tonia Barrows from cheating on her, and… that's about it. Past incidents mean Christine is going to let him try a procedure so she can have his child. It was a fill for a 'chosen kiss' meme on my roleplay journal.
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He furiously wiped the blood away from his hands, scraping at his skin with the edges of his fingernails. He had failed her, in every single sense of the word. Since the word go in their tempestuous relationship, he had been nothing but trouble for her. Whilst he had risked his life on occasions to protect her from the violence and pain dished out by others, he seemed to repay her for his efforts with more heartache than anyone other could ever give her.
He'd beaten her, cheated on her, screamed and shouted at her. He had mentally toyed with her to get what he had wanted, and now he treated her like a possession, furiously frightening off anyone with the potential, or desire, to catch her eye. He had killed in the past to keep her as his own.
He loved her, but he had an awful way of showing it.
She lay on the operating table in his sparsely populated medical bay. He had, once the Empire had been overthrow, had the majority of the equipment there destroyed and replaced. Too many tools from more violent eras, reminders of the sheer horror carried out there.
Not that he was innocent in that sense. He had performed experiments, killed in the name of 'medical science'. He knew that no matter how hard he scrubbed his hands, they would forever be stained with blood.
He had failed her today, in ways that he knew he would never quite be able to make up for. He knew she felt inadequate and fearful over not being able to mother a child with him. Especially now she knew the truth about Josiah and his paternity. He had done that to her. He had been selfish and bruised her deeply with his actions.
He'd put her through this procedure for nothing, encountering more difficulty than he had expected. She would never have children. They would never have children. He knew what it would do to her confidence. Both in herself, and in them. She would be fearful that he would stray again, perhaps even leave her. He had entirely no idea how to convince her otherwise.
She was stirring, drifting in and out of consciousness as the anesthetic wore off. With a hesitant step, he was by her side, tentatively touching her forehead. She saw it in his eyes - I failed - which caused her own to water. She couldn't cry, though. Not for a loss she never actually had to make. She hadn't quite expected things to work, despite his brilliance on the operating table. She knew she was too far gone, too damaged to be fixed. She knew that she would never be able to give him what he wanted, and it broke her battered heart.
"I'm sorry," Leonard whispered. "I love you," a tender press of his lips to her forehead, and a tear slipped treacherously down her cheek. With the angle of her head, tilted slightly to the side, it dragged over her feminine nose, lingering by the tip.
As his own eyes watered, his lips covered the tear drop on the tip of her nose, kissing it away with a tenderness he reserved for her. "My Christine. Always my Christine."