Chronicles of the Weird Zim Doom

Chapter 1

Smexy socks

Zim's eyes scanned the room. He'd had quite the boring day in quite a boring classroom. The entire endeavor had left him smothered in his own self-pity. He pitied the fact that he had to be there and he pitied the fact that he was seen as a freak no matter how hard he tried to blend in with the horrible Earth monkeys. But, most of all, he pitied the human-Dib's pathetic attempt to expose him as the Irken that he truly was. Seriously, this had to be one of his lamest ploys. Yet the Irken was too wrapped in his boredom to really care as of yet.

Dib was hurrying around Zim's desk, slapping on little sticky notes. Zim hadn't read them yet but Dib knew that he would soon. So he took the most of the time that he had to place them up and worked away. He planned to get them all on before the class came back in from recess.

There was a hiss and a chink as the door was unlocked.

Dib's head jerked up. He scrambled to his feet and jumped out of the window like the other Earth-pigs always did when leaving the room. Then he was immersed in the sounds that the children in the playground made. But soon he had to walk back in and he smiled, as he knew that his plan would unfold in a moment.

Lately, Dib had been talking a great amount of liking to Zim's sudden depression. The alien had been so occupied with his own mind that Dib had been able to pull off a few little things that might convince people that he is an alien. At one point he had knocked his wig so far askew that he was sure that the other children had seen one of Zim's antennas poking out. Dib thought that Zita's mind was already being converted to the belief that Zim was, in fact, an alien from another planet bent on destroying them all. He was pretty sure…

The class filed into the room. But as soon as they passed Zim's desk each one froze and turned to look at the strange, green boy.

He seemed ok with the fact that he was covered to head to toe in sticky note paper. The children didn't even think that he realized that he was, in fact, covered with said paper. Zita lightly tapped Zim's shoulder in a failed attempt to gain his attention. When he did nothing but stir she tried so once more. This time Zim did turn to her. But his eyes were drooping and he seemed incredibly bored and down in the dumps. It was completely unlike himself.

"Uh… Zim? Are you aware that you're covered in head to toe in sticky note paper?"

"I am."

"Are you aware that every single one of those pieces of paper has something to do with you being an alien?"

His eyes lit up at that last part. Zim examined himself and his desk. Indeed everything written had something to do with him being something other than the creatures of this Earth. He hurriedly scrambled to get the pieces of paper off. The whole while Dib was laughing at him and the children were sort of giggling as well. Dib found it quite funny for Zim to be in such a panic after watching him do the entire thing. Truly, the little Irken being like this was a gift from above.

As Zim took the last piece of paper of he glared at Dib. Then a thought struck him. It was devious, clever and, most of all would scare the Dib-stink out of his mind. Plus, he'd be able to have a little bit of fun for once in who knows how long. So it was decided. Zim was going to scare the Dib-stink well, after school.

---

Dib stepped out of the school and started on his way home, ignoring the children who seemed to linger in the schoolyard. All he really wanted to do was get home and have a good amount of laugher. Maybe he'd set up another camera in Zim's house, just for the sake of it. He could go over and ask Gir to put it in the kitchen or the computer system itself! That would work! Yes, he'd have Zim on camera and this time the swollen eyeball association would see it for sure. He would make certain of that.

So he walked home, his hopes high, a smile on his face.

His sister, Gaz, who walked next to him, didn't look so happy. She had on her usual attire and she had her Game Slave 2 resting neatly in the palm of her hand. Dib could hear the constant clicking of the buttons and the sounds of violence that came from the game. But, today, the sounds didn't really bother him all that much. He was too wrapped in his happiness over Zim's depression to really care at all for what his sister did to him. Because he knew that taunting Zim would always help his mood out.

Suddenly, something struck his ankle and he was thrown to the ground with so much force that both of his shoes flew off of his feet. They went flying through the air until they were caught by a black-gloved hand with one two fingers less than what it should have.

Dib turned his spinning head around and looked at Zim. The alien was standing over the boy, a grin on his face, Dib's shoe in his hand. He looked like he was thinking something very evil and devious. Dib really didn't like how he looked just then. It scared the crud out of him. Zim looked like his old, normal self again and Dib was afeard that he wouldn't be able to bring his spirits up again because of it.

Zim smiled wickedly at him and then opened his mouth to speak. "Hello Dib-stink. Having a good walk home? I hope that fall of yours didn't hurt of anything."

Dib was surprised. From his voice it actually, believe it or not, sounded like the Irken meant what he said. It sounded as though he actually cared if Dib got hurt or not. It actually sounded like Zim didn't want him to get hurt! Dib flinched back a little but said:

"No. I'm fine."

"That's good."

Dib flinched again!

Zim looked down at his white socks and smiled. He turned his eyes back to Dib but didn't move his head to his direction. Just his eyes. Then he said:

"Your socks turn me on."

"What?!"

"Your socks turn me on," Zim repeated.

"My socks?!"

"Yes... They turn me on oh so well..." Zim smiled and crushed Dib's shoe in his hand.

Dib didn't like where this was going...

"Hey! Gaz!" Zim ran after Dib's sister, who had continued in her walk, not caring if he had fallen or not. "You hear that! His socks turn me on! Now I feel like destroying again!"

Dib's eyes were wide as dinner plates.

His head slammed against the pavement and he black out in a faint.

---

Brooke: Just a little thing...

Zim: That was creepy.

Jack: I'll say.

Impmon: I think I'm gonna be sick!

Gir: I'll fetch the bucket!!!