This is a song fic for Avril lavignes When your gone. It kinda just popped in my head one day so I decided to write it. Hope you like it.
I sat there looking out the window. Alone ,Crying, my heart aching. I needed you here but it was useless wishing so. Its what I had asked for. I told you to leave and you did. I had been sitting here for hours but it felt like a life time.
I always needed time on my own
I never thought I'd need you there when I cry
And the days feel like years when I'm alone.
I hardly slept anymore it was to hard to sleep in that bed. When your side lay untouched. It hurt to look there and know that you had once laid there.
And the bed where you lie is made up on your side.
I sat there and watched you pack your clothes in an angry rush. I watched you walk out of my door and everything in me told me to call you back. Tell you I was sorry that it didn't matter and that I loved you. But my pride got in the way of my heart and I watched you leave.
When you walk away I count the steps that you take.
I wish I could take it all back. Wish you were here. I need you so much that it hurts. We all need you.
Do you see how much I need you right now.
It feels like my heart has been ripped apart and I try so hard to fix it but there's always pieces missing. I don't know what to do anymore so I stopped trying. I miss looking at you, you were beautiful but, it hurt too look at the pictures all around me. So I took them down. I used to hear your voice every day, it kept me grounded. You used to tell me you loved me every day. Now I don't know what do to with my self. I miss you.
When your gone the pieces of my heart are missing you.
When your gone the face I came to know is missing too.
When your gone the words I need to hear to always get me
Through the day and make it okay, I miss you.
The pain that I feel is immeasurable. All the things that I did I did with you and now all they do is remind me of you. Your friends, your family, my family. Its all just too much for me to handle. The clothes that you didn't pack are still there in the closet and on the floor. Your smell still lingers on them.
I've never felt this way before.
Everything that I do reminds me of you
And the clothes you left they lie on my floor
And they smell just like you, I love the things that you do
I cant go to sleep without reliving the whole thing. I always see you leaving and in my dreams I try to run after you but I'm stuck. I never get a full nights sleep its not helping either of us. I know you would be able to calm me down and I would sleep again. There was news that I wanted to share with you so badly. News that would've made you happy. I never got to tell you and its killing me. I need you. I miss you.
When you walk away I count the steps that you take
Do you see how much I need you right now.
When your gone the pieces of my heart are missing you.
When your gone the face I came to know is missing too.
When your gone the words I need to hear to always get me
Through the day and make it okay, I miss you.
{Three years later}
It was supposed to be forever we were a perfect match. I knew it in my heart. I put everything I could into us. I never wanted you to feel I wasn't giving you my all. Sometimes it still hurts to think about you. Think about what we could've had.
I come here to find some kind of piece. To feel that your still here somehow. I bring her here to say hi every once in a while. She never really knew you. She reminds me of you from your looks to your attitude so much that sometimes it hurts. She has your green eyes and your reddish brown hair, your pale skin. She is as stubborn as you were. She's smart for her age. I wish you were here. I wish things could've been different.
I miss you we were made for each other out here forever
I know we were and all I ever wanted was for you to know everything I do
I give my heart and soul. I can hardly breath I need to feel you here with me.
Today is a special day. Its your birthday. Its her birthday too. We came to bring you flowers. We haven't been here in a while. She wanted to talk to you. Wish you a happy birthday in heaven. My heart breaks to see her talk to your headstone. It breaks for her not being able to ever really know you, her father . It breaks for you because you never knew. For me because I lost you forever.
When your gone the pieces of my heart are missing you.
When your gone the face I came to know is missing too.
When your gone the words I need to hear to always get me
Through the day and make it okay.
"I love you daddy." I hear her whisper. I can feel the tears stream down my face. She turns around and runs over to hug me. "Don't cry mommy." she looks up at me and all I see is you. " I love you mommy."
"I love you too pumpkin." I say as I kiss her forehead and wipe my tears.
I know your looking down on us now and I want you to know.
"I love you."
"we love you."
Its time for us to go. We are going to see your parents. I pick her up a start to head back to the car. I stop and turn around to look at where you rest.
"I miss you."
So what did you think? Hit that review button and tell me?. :}
- Nene