Disclaimer: I don't own Harry Potter!

AN: For those following my Shakespeare series, I was wondering, for Twelfth Night, who do want in love (more), James Potter (Jr.) or Albus Potter? Your choice.

Lunchtime

Mary MacDonald was sitting where she always sat during lunch.

Right in-between the marauders, and Lily, Alice, and Marlene.

It was always insane there.

But, it was habit. That was where Mary had sat since first year, and she was not about to change that habit.

Anyways, it was actually interesting, what happened there.

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The marauders, well sitting next to them was pretty weird.

Mary found out many marauder secrets. Like the fact that James wasn't always so bad, and Remus could be quite the bad boy.

And Sirius, well, he's Sirius. Meaning, she had lived through many sugar highs.

Peter was just strange. Mary wouldn't be surprised if he ate his toenails for breakfast.

That was pretty much the marauders. Lily and her gang were different.

Lily was a brainiac, and was usually found studying or reading during lunchtime. But she had a fiery temper, and Mary knew just where the line was with her.

Marlene and Alice were like twins. That is, they looked like twins. They behaved nothing alike.

They both had brown hair, a little below the shoulder, and brown eyes. They were also within an inch of each other's heights. The only way that Mary could tell them apart, was that Marlene had a fairly large mole on her jawbone that many guys said was hot.

Marlene was, like Sirius, a player. She had, who knows how many boyfriends? She also was always dressed pretty girly, when free dress was allowed.

Alice, on the other hand, was casual. She would wear sweatshirts and jeans, and hadn't had many boyfriends. Quite honestly, she had none. See, Mary was somewhat close to Alice. Because, of course, they had Divination together, and were always complaining to each other, saying that the walk was killing them. So, Mary knew for a fact that Alice had always had her eye on a certain Frank Longbottom.

That was all, except, for the two guys who were usually around the marauders.

Frank and Evan.

Frank Longbottom was a pretty cute boy, who happened to also have a crush on Alice. Whoop-de-do!

Now, Evan Woods, he was just DREAMY (according to Mary)! He had dirty blond locks that fell across his face. He also spoke in an ultra-hot Irish accent. Mary knew him pretty well, because she was on the Quidditch team, along with Evan. She had a crush on him for god knows how long!

Right, well, lets get on with the lunchtime happenings.

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Mary was sitting, where she usually sat, eating her BLT. BLTs are good! Along with a pumpkin muffin and an orange.

Remus and Sirius were diagonal from her, and James was next to her. Sirius and Remus were teasing James.

"Prongsie and Evans! Sitting in a tree! K-I-S-S-I-N-G!! First comes love…"

"Will you guys SHUT UP!! You think I want Lily to know this?"

Remus raised his eyebrows. "Yeah, she'll never know you like her, because you spent the past six years here asking her out constantly!"

Sirius looked confused. "But, wouldn't that tell her he liked her? And where's Peter?"

Remus rolled his eyes at Sirius. "It's called sarcasm."

Sirius seemed to be getting angry. "I said. WHERE. IS. PETER?!"

Mary sighed. Some things, with the marauders, never change.

She decided to listen in on Lily and her friends instead.

"I'm telling you! I don't like Potter!"

Marlene sighed, and turned to Alice. "She's still stuck on phase one: denial."

"I am NOT in denial!"

Marlene and Alice sighed dramatically together, saying, "Denial."

Lily huffed, and turned back to her book.

Mary shook her head, and continued eating her pumpkin muffin, as she strained to listen to listen to Marlene and Alice whispering furiously.

Now, don't think that Mary is a stalker, or anything. To put it simplistically, Mary was an introvert. Sure, she had friends, but she wasn't one to talk at lunch. She usually sat there, and ate. So, she could easily eavesdrop on other's conversations, which she used as a sort of entertainment.

Soon, Remus and Sirius were getting up, laughing. James was looking worried.

Remus walked over to Lily, and poked Sirius in the back. Sirius began, "Evans, dahling, I have come to ask you to be James' dearest."

Lily snorted. "And why didn't James come to ask for himself?"

Sirius looked taken aback, and Remus covered for him. "James was nursing a hurt eye."

Mary stifled her laughter with her hand. She was the one who caused James' eye to hurt. James sat behind her in Muggle Studies, and, probably because she was so tired, and bored, she always threatened to poke his eye with her quill. Today, she had gotten a bit too close. Oops.

Sirius looked hopeful, "So, is that a yes?"

Lily sniggered. "No. I would like to know who poked his eye. I want to send them flowers."

Mary grinned, "Well, if you do, please don't send daisies, I'm allergic."

Lily smirked. "High five, Mary!"

Mary high fived her, and the four girls started cracking up.

Sirius sighed dejectedly, as he and Remus made their way back.

"Sorry, mate, looks like she has a death wish for you."

James ground his teeth. "You are so dead, Sirius."

"What about Remus?"

"Remus? He never does anything!"

Sirius looked sour, as Remus smirked. Whoa… Remus makes bad boy look HOT. And Mary could safely say that even Lily, who has a thing against bad boys, would agree.

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Every day, for the past three weeks, at lunchtime, Remus and Sirius, had asked Lily out for James. Every day, Lily said no.

Mary looked, up. Remus and Sirius were at it again.

Ah, Lily has, again, rejected.

Too bad. Mary had always hoped that the two, Lily and James, would get together; they would make a very cute couple.

James stood up. He looked very annoyed.

Mary wondered what this could be about; James had never reacted before.

"What are you doing? This is stupid, and I want it to end!"

Sirius said, "But, Prongsie! I want you to have a girlfriend!"

"This is the wrong way to go about it!"

"Okay, I'll hit Moony if he does anything wrong. Now, we're going to ask her out again for you."

Sirius walked back towards Lily, dragging along Remus.

James followed, nervously.

Remus stepped towards Lily, saying, "Dear Lily. James has always loved you, and-"

"No! Stop it! Please don't!" called James.

SMACK.

Sirius slapped Remus across the face. "Idiot! James doesn't want it done that way!"

Remus looked pretty angry. That might be why he elbowed Sirius in the face.

Blood started spurting out, and every girl in the hall looked menacingly at Remus.

McGonagall, rushed over. "DETENTIONS! Detentions for both of you! We will not resort to muggle violence here! Fifty points from Gryffindor! Oh, and got to the Hospital Wing, will you?" she asked, looking at the blood covering Sirius' robes, and the weird stuff oozing out of the red mark on Remus' face.

Mary sighed; marauders are really idiotic. Especially Peter. But, she hadn't seen him lately.

Mary turned back ot her salad, and listened to some girls on the other side of the marauders, which now only included James, talking.

"I really hope there's a party!" exclaimed whom she realized to be Dorcas Meadowes.

"I know!" exclaimed Hestia Jones. "That'd be the perfect way to celebrate our graduation!"

"It should be on the Quidditch field!"

"And there should be a giant stereo!"

"Huh?"

"Oh, right. It's a muggle thing. I'm a half-blood, remember?"

Mary got up. It was time she got to her next class, Arithamancy. Also, she didn't want to listen to lans for a graduation party, which would be in nine months.

As she left the hall, she bumped into Emmeline Vance, her friend from Hufflepuff.

"How you doing?"

"Fine! You leaving to beat the rush?"

"Yeah, it gets so crowded after lunch!"

"I know."

As they exited, Mary shoved open the door to the great hall. There was a loud, "Oof!"

Mary let the door fall back a bit, and saw Andromeda Black hugging Ted Tonks. The two turned dark red.

As they went up the stairs, Mary turned to Emmeline, and asked, "Do I even want to know what they were doing back there?"

"No."

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It was Marlene's birthday. She had asked, that instead of getting gifts, each do her one favor.

First, Marlene turned to Sirius, Remus, and James. "You guys can get the party in the Gryffindor common room ready."

They made a motion to leave, but Marlene told them to stay. "Now… Alice, I really need you to help me with my Herbology! And let me copy your homework in Herbology for a month."

Lily sent a look towards Marlene, but Alice shrugged, and said, "Sure."

Marlene looked at Mary. "Okay, Mary. I'd like you to get the cake ofr the party, you have great taste in cake. And, I want you to introduce me to all the Quidditch players. They're HOT!"

James blushed. Marlene looked back to her steak, and continued eating.

Sirius took the moment to ask, "Evans, will you go out with James?"

"No."

Lily cleared her throat. Seeing that this didn't work, Lily asked, "What about me?"

Marlene looked up, and said, "Oh. I forgot. Now, I've been wondering this for a long time. Which marauder (not including Peter) is the best kisser? Now, obviously, I cant' find out myself, as James would never let me kiss him, but, I was wondering if you would find out for me."

Lily paled considerably.

It was a few minutes, before Marlene said, "Now, Lily. You did agree to do anything I say."

Mary grinned at Marlene.

Lily stood up, and said, "Fine. But first, one rule: hands off me, boys."

She walked to Remus and kissed him, but it was only, really, a peck on the mouth, for both. Remus came away, looking embarrassed, as did Lily. Obviously, this was both of their first kisses.

Lily walked over to Sirius, and attempted to just peck him on the mouth, but he opened his mouth, and started slobbering over her.

Lily pushed him away, and had to 'scourifgy' herself.

She stepped over to James, with a look of absolute dread on her face. James, on the other hand, looked positively delighted.

She placed her lips on his, lightly, but, he pressed his mouth to hers. She opened her mouth just a bit, and his tongue went inside. James proceeded to snog Lily senseless.

Marlene and the others just sat there, partially disgusted, and partially amused.

Lily finally broke apart, her hair completely messed up, and lip gloss covering her whole face.

She walked off, flipping her hair over her shoulder, before saying, quite simply, "James."

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The next day, when Sirius and Remus went over to ask out Lily, James cut them off, and rushe over to Lily.

Mary leaned in, along with the rest of the hall (Not including first years, who had run for cover), to hear what was going on. Anything involving them was interesting to watch (Except for the first years. They did NOT want to be caught in one of Lily's hexes again.).

"Lily, will you go out with me?"

"I don't know. Will there be snogging involved?"

"Of course!"

The first years flinched.

"Then yes! You are a pretty good snogger."

Mary smirked. They were finally getting together on their own accord (well, not exactly, she had to threaten James to do this, using her abnormally sharp quill).

James pulled Lily up, and dipped her into a snog.

Snape fainted.

The apocalypse had finally come.

AN: It's over! You know what? That actually happened to me! I was the Mary. These guys were asking out a girl for a guy named James. No kidding. And I threatened a guy in my second period with a sharp pen (not James, but James does sit behind me in that period). But, it doesn't go any further than the snogging behind the door (that actually happened), after that, I created it.