Disclaimer: I own nothing.
Author's Note: I missed writing about CM Punk. So, I wrote a one-shot about CM Punk being a jerk. It sounded fun. Lol.
"I hate you!" she had yelled on the top of her lungs, tears flying from her eyes as she shoved him away, running down the hallway of the hotel. He remembered staring at his hands, the same hands that were holding her the night before. Her small frame became smaller and smaller until it disappeared into another room. He had leaned against the wall, swallowing hard.
"Kelsie," Phil said. "I don't want to be with you anymore."
Tears filled her eyes. He remembered those eyes from the day he met her. "What?"
"Kelsie, you should just leave."
"You're kidding. Right? Please, God tell me you're kidding." She walked closer to him, searching his eyes. He refused holding her gaze; sure he would break down from the stress if he did. God, she was beautiful. He loved her. He fucking just loved her. Why couldn't she just leave?
"Kelsie, please."
"Punk, please fucking talk to me." Her words were desperate as she pulled his shirt, forcing him to look her in the eye. He swallowed and closed his eyes. He couldn't look at her. He wasn't strong enough.
"I hate you!"
He didn't know why he told her that. He didn't have the best relationships with woman. He had dated many of the women in the wrestling business and many of them didn't have much to say about him. Maria was one of the nicest and some easily called him what he deserved to be called. He was one of the best wrestlers in the world and had many fans, but he couldn't stay in a relationship.
She wanted an apartment with him. He couldn't understand why. Kelsie was his world. While she wasn't straight-edge, she was damn perfect for him. Sarcastic and loyal, she was one of the most amazing people he had ever met. One of his friends had said to him once, she must have some kind of special feature in her to deal with you.
"We should look for an apartment, Phil. I think we've been together long enough to move in with each other. My parents love you and they wouldn't mind."
Commitment.
What a word.
He obviously couldn't commit to her.
He ran away from the best fucking thing that ever happened to him. "I hate you!" Her words were playing on repeat in his head. He could hear her sobs that followed. Why didn't he go after her?
Punk sighed. He was sitting on the bed he spent many times in with her, under the sheets, together; as one. She wanted more. He wished he had the balls to give her more. He was strong enough to not drink, not smoke, not give into the hard pull of drugs, but he couldn't give her more. He was an idiot.
He spent days thinking about her. Her things were still in his house, constant reminders of her. He found one of her shirts in his gym bag, wondering when she left it there. He smelled it; it smelled exactly like her. He missed her.
Punk looked at his phone, wondering if he called her, what would happen. Many of his co-workers had looked away at him recently. All of his friends looked at him as if he was a loser, someone to ignore.
Sometimes, he would sit in his bed, staring at his hands. He remembered holding her, touching her bare body, roaming it because it was his. She didn't let anyone else touch her other than him. Loyal. Committed.
Punk. Loser.
He just wanted her. For the first time in his life, he wanted to marry someone. He thought about her constantly for weeks on end, always staring at the phone before putting it away, waiting for a chance to make things right with her.
"I hate you!"
He loved her.
She was always at the tapings of Smackdown, spending time with the divas he introduced her to. Sometimes, they would run into each other and he would walk the other direction, praying she would call his name and just talk to him. Every time he walked away, she never said a word.
Finally, he decided he didn't want to wait anymore. He knew she was the one. When his friends talked about the one he never believed them. Could there really be someone in the world just made for you? If anyone could, it was Kelsie.
He opened his phone, staring at the text screen. Kelsie, can we talk?
Why? she replied.
He wondered what to reply. He didn't know what to say. Please, was all he could say.
He closed his eyes as he sent the text and went to the curtain for his match. It could have been the longest match of his life and he looked at his phone the second he was back in the locker room. There was a reply. He read it and nearly fell to the floor. Fine.
Punk wasn't a nervous person. He was a wrestler and did crazy things for a living. He spent hours alone driving to shows and spent more time in hotel beds than he spent in his own. He'd been to more countries than most could even name.
As Punk waited for Kelsie though, he was scared. He was staring at his hands, wondering what he could say to her. He didn't know what to say. He spent hours on a TV each week, talking and wrestling in front of millions of people who didn't know him. He didn't know what to say to Kelsie, the one person he knew him well.
"Punk."
Her voice made him look up and he nearly fell when he saw her. She was standing a few feet away, as if she was afraid to come near him. He swallowed, staring at her. "Hey, Kelsie."
"What did you want? If it's my things, I'll come get them this week. You could have just told me that on a text."
"It's not about your stuff," Punk muttered. He looked at her, noticing the necklace he gave her for their one year anniversary wasn't on her neck. It was one of the nicest things he had ever given a girl and he spent more than he spent on his first car, which was once his more accomplished purchase. The necklace meant so much more to him.
"What?"
Punk looked down. "You're not wearing the necklace."
"No. I don't want to anymore."
"I thought you loved that necklace," he said.
Kelsie stared at him. "I thought you loved me."
"I've always loved you." He walked closer to her and she immediately backed away, her eyes cautious. "Kelsie, I really fucked up."
"I'm not here to listen to you say shit that you don't fucking mean, Punk."
"Why are you here then?" he honestly wondered.
Kelsie looked away. "I don't know."
Punk sighed. He didn't expect seeing her to go like this. He thought he could smile or say a few words and it would fix everything. He left her with a few words, why couldn't a few words fix it? He leaned against the wall, knowing he had nothing that could make her listen. He was a pathetic excuse of a man, someone no one should have to love. He felt sorry for all the woman he hurt over the years, knowing he could add Kelsie to that list. His list was becoming longer and longer with each relationship.
"Why did you want me to come here?" Kelsie asked.
Punk sighed. "I don't know." He shook his head. She rolled her eyes and stared to walk away. He ran forward, pulling her toward him. He looked her in the eye, deciding the list didn't need another name on it. "I love you. I fucked up and I miss you and I can't imagine my fucking life without you. I've spent more time sitting on my ass in the past month than I have my entire life, wishing I could tell you what an idiot I was. I'm a loser and a pain in the ass and most people I know will tell you that. I'm sure you can."
"You're an asshole."
Punk nodded. "I am."
Kelsie stared at him.
"I'll I'm asking for is a chance to make everything up to you. I don't know if I'm perfect and I've never had a relationship last more than a few months. I know my relationships all ended because of me. God help me, if anyone ends for that reason, I'm a sorry excuse for a man and I can't let that happen. Please, if you still have any reason to love me, let me make what I did up to you. Please let me show that you don't hate me and there is a reason you once said you loved me."
"Punk, I will never hate you. I don't hate you."
"You said you did."
Kelsie rolled her eyes. "You said I should leave. I was hurt."
"I love you. I really, really need you in my life."
Kelsie stared at him for a long time. "CM Punk, you're a fucking asshole."
His face fell. "Okay, I'll leave."
Punk started walking away when she pulled him to her. "Don't leave."
He smiled. "Why?"
Kelsie sighed.
A few minutes later, after sitting down in his hotel room, Punk looked at her. "Why did you answer my text if you were mad at me?"
"I missed you," she admitted. "I wanted to know what you had to say." Kelsie looked at him. "As much as you hurt me, I love you."
Punk realized hearing those words meant more than he could ever explain to anyone.
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