Warning: Foul language, of course, from our favorite hanyou. And complete wierdness, which always happens when I try humor.
Disclaimer: As much as I'd like to, I don't own Inu-yasha or any other chars in the series. ::sniff::And I so wanted to feel his ears...and squeeze Fluffy's tail...
Feedback: I don't really expect it, 'cause this fic was kinda pointless, but don't let that stop you! Anything would be great!
I'll just tell you, I've been wondering 'bout this for the longest time. ^_^
~ ~ ~
Inu-yasha stared dumbstruck at the group around him, jaw open, disbelief shining clearly in his amber eyes.
~ Flashback ~ He had been dozing by his favorite tree, favoring the ground that day to the branch above him, when a light rustle made his ears perk. As the winds changed, he caught a whiff of...something. He couldn't place it, it was too faint, but he was sure he'd never smelled anything like it before. Listening to the gradual increase of rustles, Inu-yasha's eyes pinpointed movement in the grass. He watched it come closer, claws flexed and ready, just in case. Finally, stepping out from the blades of grass was...something. The dog demon frowned; it didn't look like any demon he ever saw, and even if it was a youkai, it looked harmless. It couldn't have been bigger than his hand, with a scruffy blue mop that had to be its hair. Only with the help of his demon eyes could Inu-yasha distinguish it to be a male, with pointed ears, longer than those of normal youkai. What in the seven hells was this creature? And what was it doing here? Just as he was about to snap at the little...thing...it ran up to his leg, stared for a few seconds, then poked the fabrics of his pants. Inu-yasha watched it do this a couple times, wondering what it was doing, when it suddenly fell down, holding its stomach and laughed uncontrollably. With a growl, Inu-yasha brought his thumb upon it, squishing it like he did when Myoga became a pest. He felt something give, and lifted his finger, only to find the little creature gone. Not a trace. Staring at the spot it had been just before, Inu-yasha snorted, then settled back to resume his nap. ~ Later ~ He was woken again when another scent, this time familiar, wafted to his nose. It was Shippo. Inu-yasha kept his eyes closed, hoping the fox boy would leave him alone. No such luck. "Inu-yasha?" The dog demon ignored the whispered call, chanting, "Go away" in his head as he continued to pretend to be asleep. He really wasn't in the mood to be insulted by the small demon, because it always ended up with him chasing the kitsune, only to be "sat" by Kagome. Feh. "Damnit!!" Shippo stopped jumping up and down on Inu-yasha's legs, eeped when he saw the murderous look sent his way, and scurried off to the safety of Kaede's hut. The disgruntled dog demon was almost tempted to go after the little fox boy, until the rosary beads glinted in the afternoon sun, reminding him of the consequences. Giving his sore legs one last rub, he leaned back against the tree trunk, grumbling about annoying foxes before falling back to sleep. ~ Later, again ~ Something was tickling the upper part of his foot, right above his ankle. Still drowsy, he tried to shake it off, only to have it return seconds later. He tried reaching down to scratch it, before settling back down. It came back, to his annoyance. Finally fed up, his eyes opened to see... "Miroku! What the hell are you doing?!" The monk stared innocently from the base of the half-demon's feet, the hem of his red pants lifted up slightly in his fingers. From his crouched position, Inu-yasha swore it looked like the houshi was trying to...look up his pant leg. A tick grew on the hanyou's face. 3...2...1. Several villagers looked up to see Miroku flying through the air, unconscious and with a number of bumps on his head. Some shook their heads, returning to work. They sympathized with whichever girl the lech had picked on that day. ~ Later, final time ~ "You do it." "No, you, Kagome. He's less likely to kill you." "And why's that?" "Shh. You'll wake him up." Inu-yasha woke up groggily at the hushed whispers, and the first thing he noticed was it was getting dark. The second thing he noticed was there seemed to be somebody on top of him, straddling his hip. As his eyes adjusted, he saw himself staring into a pair of wide gray eyes. Kagome's eyes. Kagome. On top. Of him. Heat rushed to his face, and he mentally thanked the dimness. Clearing his throat, he tried to keep from stammering too much. "Kagome...w-what are you doing?" "..." "Kagome, did you do it? Did you see if...oh..." Inu-yasha could make out Sango over Kagome's head, seemingly just as pale and shocked as the girl sitting on him. Which brought him back to his present situation. Inu-yasha tried to ignore the weight of Kagome on top of him, focusing instead on what she was doing on top of him. And that's when he noticed it. The sash for his pants was undone. With what might have been a yelp, the horribly red Inu-yasha leapt up, one hand clutching his pants with a death grip, dropping Kagome on the ground with a thump. "Okay, what the hell is going on here?!" Inu-yasha demanded while battling down his blush, trying to glare at Sango, who helped Kagome up. Miroku and Shippo soon joined them. All three pushed Kagome to confront the angry hanyou. The girl was flushed still, wringing her hands nervously. "Well..." ~ End Flashback ~
Sango had a slight pink tint across her cheeks, but other than that, there was no other reaction. A foolish grin was pasted on Miroku's face, and Inu-yasha would have smacked him if he weren't still in shock. Kagome was redder than Sango, and seemed unable to meet his eyes. And Shippo, perched on Miroku's shoulder, blinked, seemingly confused by the dog demon's expression.
Tense silence passed.
Golden eyes blinked slowly, once, twice, before he finally spoke.
"You mean to tell me...that all that..."
Group nod.
"...everything..."
Nod.
"...from the little creature thing to Kagome...um..."
They had no idea what the little creature was, but Sango and Miroku nodded anyway. Kagome found the ground very interesting.
"...all that...was to see if I STUFFED MY PANTS?!!!"
~ Owari ^^ ~
Author's Notes: Well, hasn't anyone wondered 'bout his puffy pants?
And yes, the little creature in the beginning was one of my elflings, #1 to be exact. He represented me, 'cause I've always wanted to poke Inu-yasha's pants. Heh. ^^