A/N Yes, it's a songfic. This fic is done to the song "You Owe Me Nothing In Return" by Alanis Morisette. It's one of the saddest songs I've ever heard. This is a one sided Meili. Takes place before the second movie. Be kind, it's my first fic. Oh, I haven't seen the whole series, but just pretend that they're still engaged.
Disclaimer: No, I don't own it *sigh*. None of it. Sorry. Wish I did. The song belongs to Alanis Morisette, definitely one of the best singers out there. CCS belongs to the genius' known as CLAMP.
Dedication: I had to Ekai-chan. This is just another of your ideas that I like. May I please use this? Anyway, this is to Ekai-chan, my new friend and support. I hope you like this.
You Owe Me Nothing In Return
By Empress Sasami
*I'll give you countless amounts of outright acceptance if you want it.I'll give you encouragement to choose the path that you want if you need it.*
Li Meiling stood there, melancholy eyes staring at her fiancee. He was fingering the scarf Sakura had made for him. Li Shaoran had been like this ever since he'd gotten back from Tomoeda, Japan. Red eyes could see through amber ones, could see the pain, the anger, the love.
The love that would never be for her.
She knew that he had fallen in love with the Card Mistress, anyone could see it. And anyone could see that she was in love with a certain Chinese boy that uses a sword. But, of course, he couln't see it. He thought that she still loved Yukito. If Shaoran continued to mope like this, sooner or later he'd make his four sisters depressed, which rarely happened. If she could get him together with Sakura, then at least he could be happy.
*You can speak of anger and doubts, your fears and freak outs and I'll hold it.You can share your so-called shame filled accounts of times in your life and I won't judge it. And there are no strings attached to it.*
"I know what's bothering you." Meiling teased as she walked over to her cousin.
"Nothings wrong with me, Meiling. Go away." he muttered. He didn't look up from the scarf.
" Now, is that anyway to talk to your dear cousin? I just thought you might want to take a trip somewhere over summer vacation. A place where a certain brown haired, green eyed girl lives." She smiled, trying her best not to cry. However, this was by far the hardest thing to do.
*You owe me nothing for giving the love that I give, you owe me nothing for caring the way that I have. I give you thanks for receiving it's my privelege. And you owe me nothing in return.*
"Eh? To Tomoeda? W-w-w-why would I want to go there?"
"Don't you want to get an answer from Sakura?"
"I can't ask her that. I'm engaged, remember?
"Jaa (well), let's call the engagment off." Meiling said softly, still wearing a smile, trying her best to not to show what she was really feeling.
"What?"
"You already like Sakura."
"N-no I don't."
"Oh, you big liar. I just want you to be happy. Since obviously it can't be with me, I'm setting you free." Meiling now sat down next to him and stared deep into the eyes of her cousin. She saw the happiness, but the mask that desperately tried to cover it started to crumble.
"Meiling, I-" he started, but looked down.
"Shaoran, I told you that we were engaged until you found someone else you liked more. Well, that time has come.
"But-"
"No, don't say anything." She softly placed her fingers over his mouth as he began to speak.
*You can ask for space for yourself, and only yourslef and I'll grant it. You can ask for freedom as well or time to travel and you'll have it.*
"Shaoran, you are in love with Sakura. I wouldn't want to make you miserable in a loveless realationship..." Meiling started to trail off. Neither said anything, uneasy silence fillled the air. "....gee, this sounds like some sappy romance drama, doesn't?" Meiling could feel the tears springing to her eyes, and tried to hold them back as well as she could, but failed.
"Meiling? Y-you're crying. Please don't cry." Shaoran started to comfort her, but Meiling just shook him off.
"No, I want you to be happy Shaoran. Anyways, you guys are way too slow. Someone needs to help you guys out."
"???"
"Oh, never mind."
"I'll go ahead and mail Sakura. I'll tell her about our engagement, and you tell the Elders." Meiling smiled and started to turn away, but Shaoran caught her by the arm.
"Meiling, I don't think that she likes me, so this is a waste anyway." Shaoran muttered.
"Oh don't be silly. She rushed over to the airport just to see you off. That has to mean something. I'm sure everything will turn out fine for you!" Then, quieter, "it sure didn't for me...."
*You can ask to live by youurself, or love someone else and I'll support it. You can ask for anything you want, anything at all and I'll understand it. And there are no strings attached to it.*
"Huh?"
She shook her head. "No, nothing."
Meiling then took up her pen and wrote:
Dear Kinomoto-san,
Hello! How are you? I'm fine. How did the report cards turn out? Knowing you, they're probably fine. Oh, by the way, my engagment with Shaoran is oficially gone. Finito. Done. He's open, single. You can have a shot at him now! I bet summer vaction has already started over in Japan. It just started here in China. Don't forget to do that homework!
Ja ne!
Meiling
Then, a second pice of paper flew out and she wrote:
Dear Daidouji-san,
Well, I told him. We broke our engagement. So far, the plan is working well. You did ask your mom if it's okay, right? I'll go ask mom to buy the tickets and we'll be out in about a week. I'll call you in about 3 days. This letter should have gotten to you by then. If not, ignore it.
Ja ne!
Meiling
P.S. It was so hard to finally let him go...
There were a few wet blotches on the paper before she stuffed them into an envelope and went out to the mailbox.
*You owe me nothing for giving the love that I give. You owe me nothing for caring the way that I have. I give you thanks for receiving it's my privelege, and you owe me nothing in return.*
*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*next week*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*
"Sir, miss, your flight will be lifting off in a short while. Please make yourselves comfortable."
Shaoran and Meiling sat down in some seats in the waiting room. Meiling had already arranged where they would stay: Tomoyo's house.
"Um....Meiling?"
She turned, her hair slightly wacking him in the process. "Yes?"
"Um....Are you sure you want to go through with this?"
"Certain. Stop worrying so much!"
" It's just, don't you want something?"
*I bet you're wondering when the next payback shoe will eventually drop. I bet you're wondring when my conditional police will force you to cough up. I bet you're wonderng how far you have danced your way back into debt.*
"Me? No. This is my gift to you."
*This is the only kind of love as I understand it, that there really is.*
"But Meiling, now what are you going to do?"
"What do you mean?"
"I mean......you liked me didn't you?"
"Well, of COURSE I l-l-liked you....."
"Then why- why are you helping me like this?"
"..........Do you love Sakura so much it hurts?"
"Y.....yes. I do."
"Then you should understand me. It's a thing called 'unconditional love'. It's the truest love....and saddest love there is."
*You can express your deepest of truths even if it means that I'll lose you and I'll hear it. You can fall into the abyss on your way to your bliss I'll empathize with.*
"Meiling.......thank you."
"What did I do?" Meiling said very softly. "I didn't do anything. It's up to you to ask her. I can't do that."
"Sir, miss, please come this way. It is boarding time."
"Come on Shaoran, we can't miss our flight." She grabbed his hand and dragged Shaoran onto the plane.
~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*On the plane~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*
"Shaoran, when we get there, Daidouji-san will be waiting for us. Help me spot her out."
"Sure."
*You can say you have to skip town to chase your passion and I'll hear it. You can even hit rock bottom have a mid-life crisis and I'll hold it. And there are no strings attached to it.*
"You know Shaoran, we could stay in Tomoeda."
"What?!"
"Yes, we could live together with Wei and finish school there. Then, we could go back to China and you could take over the clan."
"Well, that sounds nice.....did you ask mom?"
"Yes. She say it's fine."
"Then, do you wanna stay?"
"....sure, why not?"
Meiling felt more at peace with herself now. Of course, that didn't stop her from crying on Tomoyo's shoulder for a while. But, hey, there's nothoing like a good cry, ne? Eventually, things worked out for her and later she met another guy whom she really liked. This was only one chapter in her life, but it was her hardest and, in a way, her best.
*You owe me nothing for giving the love that I give. You owe me nothing for caring the way that I have. I give you thanks for receiving it's my privelege, and you owe me nothing in return.*
^*^*^*^*The End*^*^*^*^