A/N: Hello, I'm Xae! This is an attempt at KnB crack, please have a read and offer some feedback at the end, ok? Thank you! Enjoy! (Or not :P)
CHAPTER ONE
Akashi Seijuro sat at his desk in his room and started up his computer. He had had an unfavourable day and wished to do something more meaningful. His incompetent chaffeur had been one minute and twenty three seconds late in picking him up and Akashi was not pleased in the least.
Akashi tapped his keyboard. It was time to get in touch with his former Middle school team mates, Akashi decided. And when Akashi wants something, he will have it. Akashi Seijuro is absolute.
Sitting on alone at his usual burger hang out place, the boy with light blue hair sipped a vanilla milkshake from a straw on the table in front of him. It was a serene evening and he was having a pleasant time there. Just as the boy was about to get up and leave, his mobile phone buzzed. He picked it up and read the message, his eyes widening just the slightest.
'Tetsuya, get on a computer and create an instant messenger account. I wish to speak with you.'
"One at a time please!" The good-looking blonde male smiled apologetically at the swarm of teenaged girls surrounding him, each vying for an autograph on the latest copy of the Zunon Boy magazine.
"Ahhh, Kise-kun, please sign for me!"
"Kise-kun, you're so handsome!"
"I like you a lot, Kise-kun!"
The blonde signed a couple more copies of the magazine, and posed for photos with a few more girls, before he felt his phone vibrate in his pocket. Kise reached into his pocket and checked who had sent him the message. Akashi-cchi?
"Ladies, please excuse me for a moment, thank you!" Kise flashed a grin at the flock of girls and bowed his head politely, before ducking out from the crowd.
A tall teenaged boy with a mop of green hair stepped into a book store and looked around. He glanced at the shelves to his left and began browsing, looking for a particular book. Today, Cancers are ranked 7th out of the 12 horoscopes. I need a blue paperback dictionary. According to my research, this store should have one. The green-haired boy pushed up his spectacles with a bandaged hand.
The green-haired boy's handphone beeped twice in his hand, and Midorima flipped it open to read the message.
'Shintaro, access a computer and create an instant messenger account immediately. Await further instructions.'
Midorima snapped his phone shut. Oha Asa did mention that he would have a run-in with a Sagittarius, be it for better or for worse.
Beep. Beep.
The navy-haired teen's handphone vibrated on the wooden floor. The owner of the phone remained lying down, spinning a basketball on his finger.
Beep. Beep.
He grunted and sat up, the basketball still spinning on his finger. The tanned boy reached out to grab his handphone and read the message. Sighing, he stood up and tucked the basketball under his arm. Orders are orders, Aomine thought to himself. It's best that he follow Akashi Seijuro's word.
A tall, purple-haired teenager strolled casually into a snack store. He walked down one of the aisles, attracting many awed stares from the young children present. The teenager was giant, about 2 metres tall. He grabbed an armful of an assortment of snacks and proceeded to the cashier.
Murasakibara left the store with two plastic bags full of goodies, and a corn-flavoured snack roll in his mouth. Just then, he received a message.
Ah? Aka-chin wants me to make an instant messaging account? Mm I guess I'll have to do it once I get home...
AbsoluteKing_knowyourplace created the chatroom
Kuroko_Tetsuya was added
PerfectModel_ssu was added
NeverMissShots_nanodayo was added
TheOnlyOneWhoCanBeatMe_IsMe was added
LazyLazySnackss was added
AbsoluteKing_knowyourplace: It took me long enough to find out your ridiculous usernames. At least Tetsuya had the good sense to make it much more convenient for me.
PerfectModel_ssu: Ehhh? Akashi-cchi~ What is this chatroom for ssu~
AbsoluteKing_knowyourplace: This makes things easier for me to be updated on how each of you are faring at present, Ryouta. Meeting up is too difficult.
LazyLazySnacks: Ah? Hi, Aka-chin, Kise-chin.
PerfectModel_ssu: Hey Murasakibara-cchi, is that you? How's things~
LazyLazySnackss: I'm hungry.
NeverMissShots_nanodayo: As expected nanodayo.
PerfectModel_ssu: Ahhh that can only be Midorima-cchi~ How are you all doing ssu~
Kuroko_Tetsuya: Hello, Akashi-kun, Kise-kun, Murasakibara-kun, Midorima-kun.
TheOnlyOneWhoCanBeatMe_IsMe: Yo, Tetsu! Anyone knows what the hell is this place?
AbsoluteKing_knowyourplace: Greetings, Atsushi, Shintaro, Tetsuya. Daiki, do not question me rudely. This is for me to keep track of how everyone is doing.
TheOnlyOneWhoCanBeatMe_IsMe: who the heck are you?!
LazyLazySnackss: ...
NeverMissShots_nanodayo: ...
PerfectModel_ssu: ... :O
Kuroko_Tetsuya: ... Aomine-kun you really are an aho.
LazyLazySnackss: Kuro-chin, I'm hungry. Get me some snacks.
Kuroko_Tetsuya: Please obtain them yourself, Murasakibara-kun.
AbsoluteKing_knowyourplace: Excuse me, Daiki?
TheOnlyOneWhoCanBeatMe_IsMe: heck yeah, you're excused but who the hell are you?!
LazyLazySnacks: ...
PerfectModel_ssu: Aomine-cchi...
NeverMissShots_nanodayo: Aomine you idiot that's Akashi nanodayo.
TheOnlyOneWhoCanBeatMe_IsMe: oh. OH. OHHH.
LazyLazySnackss: I'm hungry. Get me some snacks, Kuro-chin.
Kuroko_Tetsuya: Please be quiet, Murasakibara-kun.
TheOnlyOneWhoCanBeatMe_IsMe: IM SORRY AKASHI GEEZUS I DIDNT KNOW IT WAS YOU.
AbsoluteKing_knowyourplace: *snip snip* Daiki, I believe you are in dire need of a haircut.
PerfectModel_ssu: Ehhhhh Why is everybody ignoring my question ssu~~ TT3TT
Kuroko_Tetsuya: Sorry, what was your question Kise-kun?
NeverMissShots_nanodayo: Because you're an idiot, Kise nanodayo.
PerfectModel_ssu: DDD':
TheOnlyOneWhoCanBeatMe_IsMe: nononoNONO AKASHI IM NOT I AM REALLY NOT.
AbsoluteKing_knowyourplace: Are you very sure, Daiki? Because I have a brand new pair of scissors with me and it won't take me very long to go down to your place.
LazyLazySnackss: That's right, Kuro-chin, your house isn't very far from mine, you can get me some snacks when you go out.
Kuroko_Tetsuya: It is not convenient for me, like I have mentioned before, please obtain your snacks by yourself, Murasakibara-kun.
NeverMissShots_nanodayo: It is a good day for Aquarius today nanodayo.
TheOnlyOneWhoCanBeatMe_IsMe: and what the hell has that got to do with anything?
NeverMissShots_nanodayo: Everything, nanodayo.
PerfectModel_ssu: Everyone! Check out the latest issue of Zunon Boy! I'm on the cover page! Hey, don't I look so handsome ssu~~
LazyLazySnackss: No
NeverMissShots_nanodayo: No.
Kuroko_Tetsuya: not exceptionally, no
TheOnlyOneWhoCanBeatMe_IsMe: no
PerfectModel_ssu: DDD: Not even Akashi-cchi?
AbsoluteKing_knowyourplace: My, my, Ryouta, your hair looks so tempting. May I trim it for you? *snip*
PerfectModel_ssu: Ahh- Ahhhh- KUROKO-CCHI HELP ME DO SOMETHINGGG
Kuroko_Tetsuya: There is nothing that I can do for you, Kise-kun. Please survive well today. You too, Aomine-kun.
TheOnlyOneWhoCanBeatMe_IsMe: Tetsu, WAIT WHAT IS THAT SUPPOSED TO-
AbsoluteKing_knowyourplace: I'm not done with you yet, Daiki. Your rudeness irritates me.
TheOnlyOneWhoCanBeatMe_IsMe: SHIT NO HELPP
NeverMissShots_nanodayo: Mm Oha Asa is correct, as usual. Geminis and Virgos will find themselves in a predicament, and Gemini's have a 35% chance of things turning in their favour, while Virgo's have 17% chance.
TheOnlyOneWhoCanBeatMe_IsMe: BLOODY SHUT UP, MIDORIMA.
LazyLazySnackss: Ahh the snack store has run out of my favourite snacks. I'm hungry.
Kuroko_Tetsuya: For the last time, I will not get you snacks, Murasakibara-kun.
A/N: Please Fave/Follow/Review! (or all three :D) Tell me what you think! It wasn't my best, but I'll try to make it more interesting!
~ Xae