Disclaimer: I don't own DBZ or any of the characters....I'm just borrowing a few of them. :P
Okay...I wasn't quite sure what section to put this in. I personally think it's kind of funny so I put it in general/humor. There will be some oocness in this fic...and some things may not make sense, but I'm a crazy lunatic....and it's just a fic anyway so bear with me. I always wondered what would happen if Vegeta and Nappa met up again so I decided I'd write a fic about it. This story is pretty dumb, but I did spend quite a bit of time on it, and it is kinda funny in some parts. So please give it a try. By the way, sentences in italics represent the character's thoughts. If it's just one word in italic, it's probably just to emphasize (sp?) a word. But if it's a sentence, it's the character's thoughts. ^_^
Quote of the moment: I'm not usually a praying man, but if you're up there, save me Superman!! (Homer from "The Simpsons")
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All rational thought was lost to the man as he focused souly on blocking out the excruciating pain that seemed to engulf his every nerve. He screamed out loud as the fires of Hell engulfed his body in a monstrous agonizing flame. He gritted his teeth and tried hard to focus on staying conscious. This was truly Hell. There was no mercy in this world. Only pain; blind excruciating pain. He could hardly remember what his life had been like before he was forced to come here. His mind and body were raw from the constant torment. He almost never had anytime to think...but when he did...he would sometimes remember one person. Then it would come to him...slowly. Vegeta...his friend....his prince had betrayed him. He'd done this to him. It was all his fault. After everything he'd done for the brat. The one person he thought he could trust. Unfortunately, he never had much time to ponder such things as the torture would continue it's merciless onslaught moments later...
After what seemed like an eternity to Nappa, his nameless tormentor seemed to take pity on him and the pain gradually let up. With no strength left to support him, the large warrior went crashing face first onto the hard marble floor. He groaned painfully and lay still for awhile before slowly opening one bloodshot eye. He could see something...a light.?. What was this? He reached for it blindly desperately wanting it to come closer. Well wouldn't you know it? It DID come closer...and closer and closer...and closer and CLOSER...and then it moved away......but then it came closer again. Nappa's eyes stung with painful tears as he gazed at the light's glorifying beauty. (geeeez..it's just a light; get over it...what a dork..) The light grew larger and engulfed his body in a glowing ray of warmth. The light lifted him high into the air, and carried him away.
Nappa didn't really know what to think of this, but he didn't question it. After all, any place was better than Hell. The light cradled his battered body gently and calmed his raw nerves. He couldn't remember the last time he felt SO relaxed. He swore he could even hear angels singing in the background. Well anyway, nothing lasts forever so the light dropped him suddenly, and he landed face first in the dirt. Finally regaining his equilibrium, he jerked angrily toward the light demanding to know what was going on.
"What's going on !!!?" he shouted to the big ball of light. (Well said Nappa....)
"You've been given another chance," the big ball of light stated calmly. (from now on the big ball of light will be known simply as BBOL)
"Another chance?" Nappa repeated dumbly even though it wasn't really necessary for him to do so.
"That's what I said," replied BBOL even though it was just a dumb ball of light and probably didn't even know what it was talking about.
Well anyway, suddenly the light grew even brighter than it was a moment ago. It grew so incredibly bright that Nappa had to shield his eyes from it's intensity. He felt pain and then blacked out.
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Wha..where am I?
Nappa slowly looked around, slightly disoriented. He seemed to be in a cage of some sort. Oh great, I'm back in hell. Looks like that stupid fairy thing lied to me. However, upon further inspection he made a startling discovery.
What the f*ck?!! This cage is made of wire!!! Okay. Has Hell been getting budget cuts or what?
He also noticed that his body was shivering slightly even though he wasn't in the slightest bit cold. His now oval shaped eyes widened enormously as he glanced in the mirror that just happen to be right next to him. A soft whimper emerged from his furry throat as he realized where he was...and WHAT he was. This can't be happening to me!!! His reflection showed a cute little Chihuahua staring back at him with equally wide eyes.
"Nooooooooooooo!!!!!!!" he howled in dismay. "It can't be!!!"
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After a few hours of running in wild circles and smashing into the side of the cage, Nappa the dog finally decided it was time to rest, or at least his body did. He walked up to one of the cage walls and looked out. As far as he could tell, he was in some kind of store. There were all kinds of other animals trapped in cages with a price slapped on the side. Smashing his face against the cage, (so he could see better) he glanced down and saw that he was priced at $300.000.
"What kind of an idiot would pay 300 bucks for a dog?" he whispered quietly.
Just then the Sayian we all know and love strolled in the door with his son in tow. Realizing they were in the wrong store, Goku and Gohan left and then Vegeta walked in. (I'm just kidding..Vegeta's my favorite...^_^;;;) The prince looked less than thrilled as he stood by the door, looking around disinterestedly at all the different animals.
Nappa's eyes reached new proportions as he gaped at his old partner. He couldn't believe it. What the hell was Vegeta doing here!!? And at this exact moment. I mean, talk about a coincidence!!
"Damn you Vegeta..I don't know what you're doing here, but you are SO dead!!" he barked angrily. I"LL RIP YOUR HEAD OFF!!!!"
He continued to rant, but unfortunately most people don't speak dog so his threats were left unheard.
Meanwhile up at the front of the store, a sales clerk with a cheerful smile plastered on his face walked over to Vegeta and stood off to the side eager to serve the new customer.
"May I help you sir?" the acne covered geek asked politely.
"I need to get a stupid pet for my stupid son's birthday because my stupid mate insisted on it," Vegeta growled stupidly.
"I see...so you want to get a pet for your son?"
"That's what said,"
"Umm..okay..what kind of pet do you have in mind..?"
"I'd like something that will be utterly and totally obedient and obey my every command without hesitation."
".........."
"Well, do you have anything like that?"
"Uhh....Well, I guess that would be a dog,"
"Fine, I want a dog then."
"We don't have many dog's right now....."
"What about that one," Vegeta countered moving his head slightly to the left.
Following the movement, the clerk found his gaze drawn to the puny Chihuahua in the corner of the store. It was currently running wildly about the cage frothing at the mouth. It continued to claw franticly at the wire of it's cage and snap at the air. The acne covered guy was astonished, as he had never seen a Chihuahua behave in such a manner. He turned back to his would-be customer, eyes still wide.
"You want that?"
"It's a dog, isn't it?"
"Well, yea..but, it's crazy."
Vegeta strolled over to the cage and stood off to the side of it. The dog continued to snap it's tiny jaws in his direction and claw at the walls of it's prison in a desperate attempt to rip his throat out. Vegeta's smirk widened as he reached his hand out.
"I think it likes me," he said poking it in the face with his index finger.
"Um sir. Please don't do that..." the dorky sales clerk chided nervously.
::poke:: ::poke:: ::poke:: ::poke::
"Sir, if you don't stop that, I'll have to ask you to leave..."
"Go ahead and try to make me leave," Vegeta replied withdrawing his hand from the cage.
"........"
"That's what I thought." "Now wrap the stupid dog up so I can leave."
"You don't wrap up a dog, sir." "It won't be able to breath."
Vegeta simply ignored him and opened his wallet.
"How much?"
"$300.000."
"There," he said handing the dork his money.
"You'll have to wait a moment, sir." "I need to get my gloves so I can put that dog in a box or something for you."
"Don't bother," Vegeta replied opening the cage. He grabbed the snarling Chihuahua and slammed it none to gently on the counter.
"Just give me a leash or something."
Nodding, the dork grabbed a nearby leash and attached it to the dog's collar. Avoiding the dog's snapping jaws, Vegeta grabbed the end of it and headed out the door with the Chihuahua dragging behind him.
Once they were outside, Vegeta picked the dog up and flew into the air. He hoped getting this stupid dog for Trunks would be enough to satisfy his harpy of a mate. He didn't want to have to deal with Bulma's constant nagging if she thought the dog wasn't a good enough present.
He looked down at the adorable little Chihuahua in his arms and smiled slightly when he saw that it was trying gnaw his hand off.
"Well...it is sort of cute," he admitted silently. (only cause nobody else was around though)
Nappa growled loudly when he realized that his constant biting and scratching wasn't doing the slightest bit of damage. He glared at Vegeta's hand and saw that he'd put a hole in his glove. He smiled slightly and then began to laugh like a maniac.
"MWHAHAHAHAHA!!!!" he laughed evilly. "You think that's bad Vegeta?" "Just you wait." I haven't even begun to fight!!" "You'll be sorry you ever killed me now!!!"
He continued to laugh insanely for a few minutes, only stopping when he couldn't breath anymore. Vegeta looked down when the dog wouldn't shut-up. Why the hell was it barking that way? It almost sounded like it was.....Laughing.
That's crazy. Dog's don't laugh.....You're loosing it Vegeta....
Vegeta thought about this for a moment and allowed himself to chuckle a bit. Then he couldn't hold it in any longer and started laughing hysterically. Both Nappa and Vegeta were laughing so hard that they didn't even see the low-flying airplane right in front of them until it was too late. Of course, Vegeta was powered up so when the plane's wing hit him it didn't do anything....at least not to him anyway. They both watched transfixed as the plane went spinning out of control and crashed into a nearby building.
"Whoops," Vegeta said innocently as he stared at the flaming wreckage. He tried to be serious about it, but when he saw some guy covered in flames jump out the window, he started cracking up again.
"Alright, way to go Vegeta!!," Nappa shouted excitedly." There must have been hundreds of people on that plane and even more in that building!!"
Vegeta finally stopped laughing after a while and held the dog out at arms length. "You know dog," he began. "I don't know why, but having you around seems to bring back fond memories." I haven't laughed like that in a long time."
"You said it." Nappa replied wagging his tail excitedly.
"Lets go before the news people or the police get here." I don't want Bulma to know I had anything to do with this."
Nappa wagged his tail happily, but stopped when he remembered something.
Hey wait a second...I'm supposed to be mad at him!!! Stay focused you idiot!!..........Well...maybe I should PRETEND to like him....and then bump him off when he least expects it!!! YEA!! That's the ticket.
Nappa smirked evilly. "Alright Vegeta," he said looking up. "Let's go home....so I can KILL your family!!!" "MWhahahahhaha!!!!!!...."Oops..did I say that out loud...?" "...Oh well, it doesn't matter. "He can't understand me anyway." "MWHAHAHAHAHA!!!!!!"
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Authors note: Trouble's brewing for Vegeta and his family as Nappa the dog plots his revenge. What'll happen next?!!! Stay tuned for the next chapter...if you care that is... By the way, please review. Do you like this story? Do you hate it? Does it suck? Please tell me what you think. If anyone has any ideas as to what should happen next, feel free to tell me. I'm open to suggestions. And if anyone wants to e-mail me for some strange reason, my e-mail address is below.
Meowy19@aol.com
::sigh:: Yes, I have AOL...my parents won't get anything else.. ::grumble::