Author's Notes: This story was originally supposed to show my support for same-sex couples, but I think this story turned out to be more like crack then angst. This was told in Hinata Hyuuga's point of view and follows the childhood of Naruto, Sasuke and her.
My Childhood Crush
By baluyutbee
When I was in second grade, I experienced my first crush, Naruto. He was my best friend. But he was always looking at this other boy, Sasuke, in a special way. I felt jealous. I recall overhearing some of the teachers talking about Naruto and Sasuke, saying that they were possibly gay. Iruka-sensei disagreed, saying that it was too early to tell. I didn't really know the meaning of being gay back then. I thought it was okay if Naruto was gay, that we could still be together even if he was. I was clearly an innocent girl.
One day, Naruto and I were sitting by the swings when Sasuke suddenly got hurt playing soccer. "Itaai!" Sasuke yelped in pain, as he rubbed his scrapped knee.
"Hey Naruto, you like my new skirt –" I got cut off. He ran over to Sasuke as fast as he could and making sure Sasuke was okay. I just sat there, not knowing what to do. Naruto had special feelings for Sasuke. I should try to understand that. I started to swing myself on the swings slowly, back and forth. I felt upset. Naruto paid more attention to Sasuke than me.
On a rainy and cloudy day in April of the same year, I opened my umbrella outside, waiting for my mom to pick me up. There were only two students left, Sasuke and I. I saw him still gathering his things from inside the classroom after being lectured by our teacher about not disturbing other kids while at work. He soon came out of the classroom and stood next to me.
I turned to him, "Are you waiting for your mom, too?" Since he had been slightly taller than me, I had to look up to him. He nodded.
"Yeah, she's always late. I don't like it!" Sasuke pouted, crossing his arms in front of his chest.
I sighed and looked at the pavement below me. "My mommy's never late, only today she is. She didn't even tell me."
Sasuke then opened up his green frog umbrella. He started twirling around with it. He laughed with glee. I thought it looked fun, so I joined him. We then started to prance and dance around the wet pavement. Laughter was being shared between us. The rain stopped pouring shortly after. I put my umbrella down, spreading out my arms as the cold air brushed against my pale skin.
"Does this mean that we're friends now?" He asked me cautiously. He didn't seem to be afraid to get any of my girl cooties.
I grinned at him from ear to ear, "Yeah!" He approached me and we shared a tight hug.
"Hinata, time to go," I heard by mother soft and loving voice call out to me. I turned around and saw my mom standing behind us. I nodded and grabbed her hand. I turned around to Sasuke, "And don't worry, I don't have any cooties!" Sasuke's face brightened up in delight.
"I don't have any cooties either!" He grinned at me, his teeth showing.
I didn't really know what being gay was, only that they didn't have any boy cooties.
After that incident, Sasuke and I became better friends. Soon, he started to hang out with Naruto and I, we became a trio of best friends. I was however, jealous at how special Naruto treated Sasuke. Naruto never treated me like that.
In fifth grade, I was walking in the hallways, heading to the washroom. I stopped in my tracks when I heard voices coming from outside. I walked over to the exit, where I heard the outside, I saw Sasuke being cornered by three seventh grade boys.
"Hey, Sasuke the faggot!" Trey, a seventh grader said and pushed Sasuke to the wall. Sasuke's back made a loud thud after hitting the wall. I ran over to them, grabbing Trey's shoulder.
"Stop! You guys are going to get in trouble!" I warned them, but they didn't listen. He shook my hand off his shoulder and turned his attention back over to Sasuke.
"You like being gay, little sissy?" Trey asked Sasuke, both hands on the wall and trapping Sasuke. I attempted to stop them once more. Pushing Trey to the side. He didn't tip easily, that's for sure. He shuffled one step over, which instantly separated his hands from the wall. He faced me, anger in his expression. "Stop butting into other people's business." He glared at me. I wasn't frightened.
"No, I won't. Sasuke's my friend! It is my business." I argued with him, kicking him in the shin. Trey grabbed his shin, as he hissed in pain. He shook the pain off as he walked over to me. Trey's companion, Haku, resumed to taunting Sasuke. Sasuke was on the verge of tears. Trey continued to walk over to me. Each step he took towards me, I took a step back. I just watched in horror as to what they were about to do next.
"I guess I shouldn't call you a boy because you don't like girls, do you?" Haku mocked him. It seemed as if they were having fun. I closed my eyes and turned away. Sasuke wasn't saying anything. I stopped in attempts of trying to escape Trey. He turned away and looked over at Sasuke.
"Have nothing to say?" They laughed. Haku pulled Sasuke up by his colar. I ran over to them, kicking Haku in the process. I grabbed Sasuke's wrist and made a dash for it. He returned to class with a bruised cheek.
I didn't really know what being gay really meant; only that being gay was dangerous.
A thought struck me like a bullet through my heart. Maybe it was true. Maybe what everyone's been saying about Naruto and Sasuke was true. They were both gay. That same night, I went on the computer and searched what gay meant, to fully understand. It said that you weren't normal if you were gay. Did that mean that Naruto and Sasuke weren't normal? They could walk perfectly fine, and talk perfectly find. Just because they like someone of the same sex, doesn't mean that they aren't normal. They were human and that in itself is normal.
Ninth grade came and I still had a feelings for Naruto. I soon realized that the number of friends I had were slowly decreasing. I only had Naruto and Sasuke. After close observations, I found out that they both had mutual feelings for each other. They both hadn't come out about their feelings though. Yet.
That day, our school had an early dismissal and Naruto and I were walking home together. It was a beautiful day outside, as it was already June. The sunshine felt warm against my skin. We saw Sasuke, leaning against the school gates. He walked towards us and asked me if he could talk to Naruto alone. I said "sure" with unwillingness in my voice. They walked towards the park nearby, while I eavesdropped.
They stopped walking near the slide. Sasuke reached for Naruto's hand, "I think I like you." They stood in awkward silence. Naruto pulled his hand back slowly. I could see the pain in his expression. Naruto started to walk away, far away from Sasuke. He had his head down. Sasuke stood there, not knowing what to do. Naruto came to talk to me about it the next day.
"I don't want him to tell him how I feel. We'll just both get hurt." Naruto confronted to me. I still liked him, even if he was gay. I don't mind.
By twelfth grade, everyone knew Sasuke was gay. Naruto didn't say anything. He also started to avoid Sasuke, after the sudden confession. I became Sasuke's only friend. Sasuke soon sunk into a deep depression that he never got over. Three months later, he committed suicide by jumping off a bridge. I attended his funeral. So did Naruto.
Sasuke was everywhere. On the newspapers, televisions, he was the talk of the world, labeled as "Boy who committed suicide for being gay." Nobody knew his real name. He was just labeled as that. I couldn't do anything to help and I felt like the worst friend.
Naruto and I had just finished high school. The summer of that year, he came out to his parents.
"Mom, Dad," He paused. "I hope you can understand."
Even though he asked them to understand, they never did.
Everyone hated him, and he couldn't love the way he wanted to and the people he wanted to. Naruto thought that he wasn't allowed to love anyone. He thought that he'll just get hurt in the end. Nobody accepted him. I don't know what he did wrong. What was so wrong about liking someone of the same sex? Why was it so wrong for people in this world to be gay? Why were they so hated? If coming out wasn't an option... then what is?
I don't really know what the meaning of gay is; only that they were outcasts.
Author's Notes: I hope that my message has come across.