Cell vs. the Candy Heart

By Mouka

Yuki sat on the edge of the tournament stage, munching on the bag of candy hearts she'd picked up on her grocery run earlier. These last few days leading up to the tournament seemed to go by like this - her sitting around finding various ways to pass the time, Cell standing out in the middle of the stage, arms crossed, head down, eyes closed… like some kind of statue. Occasionally, he and Yuki would converse for a little while, or bicker and quarrel over some random thing, but mostly the days were just him standing there ignoring her. 'Meditating', or whatever. Yuki sighed. He tried to explain it to her once, something about power levels and ki, but she wasn't a fighter and it went way over her head.

She fiddled around with one of the hearts, stamped with the phrase 'TXT ME'.

"Well, that's not a romantic phrase at all." she said to herself, tossing the candy off somewhere in the distance. Trying again, she reached into the bag for another one, and pulled out a blue heart that said 'KISS ME'.

"That's a much better…" Yuki smiled and paused for a moment, glancing behind her at the man in the middle of the stage. That was when the idea hit her. A glorious, wonderful idea! An idea that, if successful, would result in a kiss. However, if it were unsuccessful, it might result in Yuki getting her head blown off. But that was just technicalities. Weighing the pros against the cons, she decided the pros won out. Armed with nothing but a bag of hearts, she marched toward Cell, determined to see her plan through to the end.

"Hey, Cell."

She stood only a few feet away from him now, his back facing her, not moving a muscle. Either Cell didn't hear her, or was blatantly ignoring her. Yuki was going to assume the former.

"HEY, CELL. Can you hear me, or are you off meditating in nirvana or whatever?"

Again, nothing.

"Hey Cellllll. Hey. Hey. Hey. HEY. HEYYYYYYY!" she shouted, louder than she had to, knowing full well that he tended to respond once he got annoyed enough.

"What?!" he scowled, arms now at his side, and turned just slightly enough to glare daggers at her. "Just what is so important to bother me about this time?"

"I have a present for you!" said Yuki, a giant grin plastered across her face.

"No." The rejection was swift and blunt, as he went back to his original position turned away from her.

"Come on. Just keep your eyes closed and hold out your hand and I'll give it to you! You'll like it, I promise. I SWEAR."

Cell spun around, attempting quite unsuccessfully to intimidate her by staring her down. He knew by now it was a futile move, but it never hurt to try. "Will you leave me alone if I go along with whatever little game you're playing?"

"Yes. Maybe. I don't know."

He said nothing and rolled his eyes. The angry glare faded into something that could best be described as bored resignation. Yuki picked up on it immediately. It was a good sign, a sign that told her that he would definitely not be blowing her head off in the immediate future …probably.

"Okay, now close your eyes and hold out your hand."

"Why?"

"Because it's a surprise!"

"I thought it was just a present."

"It's a surprise present, okay? Do iiiiiit."

Cell frowned but complied with her request, placing his hand in front of her. Yuki held back a schoolgirlish giggle. This was it! The culmination of her awesome plan for a possible kiss. It wasn't like she hadn't kissed him before, but this was a different sort of thing. It would be a kiss symbolizing her victory! It would be awesome! With renewed self-confidence, she sifted through the bag of candy until she picked up another 'KISS ME' heart, and placed it in Cell's outstretched hand.

"Okay, open your eyes now!"

Cell looked down at the item in his hand with mild disinterest. Yuki tapped her foot impatiently, waiting for some sort of reaction from him. Thirty seconds passed as he continued to stare at it, and the awkward silence started to get a little too much for her. She knew that look on his face, the one that told her Cell was analyzing the situation in his head, trying to figure out the proper response. She'd seen that look many times before, usually when it came to matters of romance. It was one of those weird endearing qualities she found absolutely adorable.

After what seemed like forever, he shifted his gaze to her and frowned. "This is a food item with 'Kiss me' carved into it."

"Uh… yeah." Yuki sighed.

His frown grew wider. "Are you expecting me to eat this? You do realize that I don't eat. Or did you forget?"

"No, you dummy! It's the message! Geez!" she placed her hands on her hips.

Cell's gaze fell back down on the strange candy. Yuki was clearly feeling affronted. He inwardly smiled as the pieces fell into place, though he continued to frown at her. "Oh… I see. This is some roundabout way of asking me to kiss you."

"…it's not 'roundabout', it's romantic."

"You could just say 'Kiss me.' instead of giving me this thing. Wouldn't that be easier than carving it into a piece of candy and bothering me with it?"

"Ugh, don't be such a jerk!" Yuki snapped, shooting Cell a look that would stop a weaker man dead in his tracks. "I was being nice!"

"See what being nice gets you?" Cell tsked. He flicked the offending candy straight at the glowering woman and turned back around to his original position, facing away from her. The heart bounced off Yuki's head and landed on the smooth stone of the stage they stood upon.

Normally in a situation like this, a girl would bawl and run away crying. But this was not a normal situation, nor were these two normal people. Even though Cell again stood in his meditative pose, she could see that his usual rigidness was gone and his body was much more relaxed. Which meant he wasn't meditating at all. He was just pretending and would still listen to whatever Yuki had to say. It was one of his many 'tells', and she wasn't falling for it.

Yuki bent down and picked up the heart and, with the boldness of a thousand Spartan soldiers, walked around Cell and marched right up until she was inches from his face. She took the candy and threw it as hard as she could at his face. He didn't even flinch.

"First of all, you asshole, you obviously don't know your own damn strength because that HURT! I am literally going to have a red mark on my forehead from a candy heart. I mean, what the HELL?!"

Still no response.

"…secondly!" Agitated beyond belief now, she balled her hands into fists, her knuckles white. "SECONDLY! I did not carve anything into a piece of candy, they come pre-printed like that you complete idiot. And third…"

Yuki looked down at the ground and sighed. Things were not going in the direction she wanted, but they rarely ever did with this guy. "Third… would it hurt you to be romantic for just five minutes?"

Cell's eyes shot open and he stared at her with the most deadpan expression she'd ever seen. "It's not in my genetic makeup to be 'romantic'. If I attempted any kind of romance, my mind would essentially short circuit and my head would explode."

He continued gazing straight at her with that overly serious face, and she stood there, mouth agape, blue eyes wide as saucers. The phrase 'deer in the headlights' came to Cell's mind.

The silence stretched out a few more seconds before Yuki finally spoke up. "You… you're messing with me. You've been messing with me this whole time!"

A sly smile spread across Cell's face. "Maybe just a little."

"You are such a dick! This whole freakin' time I thought you were-" Yuki was cut off as he placed his hand on the back of her head, pulled in closer, and brought her lips up to his own. After the initial shock, Yuki's eyes fell shut and she found herself returning the kiss, wrapping her arms around him in an effort to reduce the distance between them even more.

After a few intense minutes, they parted. Cell looked down at her with a smug, self-satisfied grin. "Happy?"

"I, uh… you just… ummm. Yeah." Yuki was flustered, and incredibly embarrassed since she couldn't keep the heated blush from spreading across her cheeks. It felt like any word she said would cause her brain to stop working. Or melt. Or both?

"Very eloquent."

"Oh my god, give me a minute! I'm… recovering." she said, and couldn't help but to smile.

Yuki had gotten her victory kiss. And it was, just as she thought, awesome.