~The Tragedy of Snape~
By:
Fear Die Rothaarige
The first time I saw you, you were sitting in a medow not far from your home. You was sitting with legs pulled up to your chest, thin pale arms wrapped around pale freckled legs, and your face hidden by stunning auburn hair reflecting the noon day sun and over your thin frail frame was a dark purple dress. I had never seen you before. No one ever came into this hidden meadow, but there you were. When you looked up, you stole my breath away. In that one mind blowing moment when your smoldering green eyes rimmed in red meet my own pitch black suns I knew I was lost to this beautiful child.
From that moment on, any day spent without hearing your sweet angelic laughter or seeing the bright green eyes was pure hell. You were such a beautiful child with such a wonderful gift. The more time I spent with you the more I fell deeper and deeper into the deep green eyes, the long auburn hair, the odd and unqiue sense of humor, and just the overall person you were. Each day I fell deeper and deeper in love with you.
The day you recieved your letter we screamed and we danced all around our meadow. And when we fell exausted onto the soft green grass I wish with all my might that this day this very moment would last forever. But like all my wishes, they went unanswered and the moment ended when your sister came streaking to the medow for you to come home. Your father wanted to see the letter that would change your life forever. You smiled and said we would take a trip to Diagon Ally together, then you were gone in a flash of auburn and bright green.
Standing in the great hall watching the talking hat sit upon your head my heart hammered in my chest. And when it screamed out Gryffindor I hadn't had a prouder moment in my short life. I was over joyed for you to be in such a noble house. But I also knew that like many before me I would be placed in your rival house Slytherin. And at the moment my house of snakes was called to me I knew in my heart it was the begining of the end. And sometimes I can't help but wonder did you know it then too?
You excelled at almost everything you did. I was not the least bit shocked when you became a quick favorite among the teachers. I was happy and proud of you. I really was.
I remember you and I sitting in the stone of the side of the lake. Our school books spread out all around us. You were lost in a spell for Defense Against The Dark Arts while I was lost in you. We were almost 13 and those boyish feelings of love were starting to blossom more. I remember tracing your developing frame with my eyes taking in the sight. I reached out and brushed your hair from your shoulder accidentally brushing your neck. You looked up curiosity clear in those bright green eyes (eyes that I often got lost in). I backed away and fell off the rock landing in the autum leaves. My face scarlet, I looked up at you leaning over the side of the rock confusion and amusement mixing together on your face. You opened your perfect pink lips to speak but you stopped and held out a hand to me. Without a word I took it. I never dared another move like that again.
Do you remember that? Or did that memory fade from your mind when you became entranced by him?
He was a stupid selfish stuck up prick. And I remember you saying that to me one day during our 5th year not long before you became trapped by his snare. Do you remember the day you became a hypocrite?
It was a late summer day, the evenings had just started be cold enough to wear a cloak. The sun was still in the sky, it was almost time for dinner in the Great Hall. Most of the students were outside trying to enjoy the last of the pleasent weather before it turned to a bitter biting cold. We'd been playing a game of cards, something called Rummy. You were so much better at it than me. I had only mastered the basic skills while you set elaborate plans into motion. You were winning easily while I was losing pitifully. But I didn't matter I loved hearing you laugh and watching your brow's knit together in concentration. It was rather cute, but 16 year old me never would have admitted something like that.
Without warning a soccer ball landed on the ground, scattering all of our cards everywhere. I looked up, ready to hex someone. I saw the one who stole you away from me. I had my wand out, ready to do battle and he did the same. And then quick as lighting, you got between the two of us, saying you didn't want any fighting. How noble of you. I lowered my wand, keeping my eyes on him. He flicked his hair and grinned at you. And at that moment everything became clear. I could see the flicker of feelings rise in your heaven-sent green eyes. And in that moment I knew I had lost you.
You grew to love him and we drifted apart. While you ran with the popular boys and girls around the courtyard and castle, I was left out in the rain looking in wishing it was me holding you within my arms and me who was kissing you behind the third floor stairs. Sometimes in the hallway if we were ever passing by, you'd smile at me and say a brief hello, but you always went back to him.
Him. Him. Him. But never me. Not the boy who loved you since the day he found you in the medow, crying. No... It'd never be me.
After Hogwarts I had a few girls that some would say I dated, but none of them compared to you. You still haunted me in my dreams. Maybe haunted is the wrong word. Maybe graced... Yeah, graced me in my dreams cause that was the only time you were mine.
I heard about your wedding. That night I drank myself into a stupor. I was a broken man, and that is when I turned to the dark arts. At first it was simple curiosity. Just playing with things here and there. A few years after your marriage, I heard of the birth of your son. I found myself in Godric's Hallow one day, knowing you'd be there somewhere. You never came back home, and well... Neither did I. Two of a kind, right?
There is a fountion of old Godric himself in the square and I was sitting on the lip of it, head in my hands when I heard your magical laugh. Looking up, I saw you. The women of my dreams, pushing along a blue baby carriage with him right beside you. You both had a hand on the handle and the other interlocked. I walked out of the square, but before I could leave I swore I heard you whisper my name. Maybe it was only the wind, but it reminded me so much of what I had lost.
A year later, I heard of your death and I was almost destroyed. I was only kept alive by the request of Dumbledore to keep your young son alive. As the years went by I became a for faithful (if you wish to call it that) server of the Dark Arts and to Voldemort himself. I was playing a dangerous game, and I didn't care. I did it for you, not for him, your one and only child. Only you.
And then, my last day on earth came. I knew that by the time the clock struck midnight signifying the next day, my body would be cold. I had been the one who truly killed Dumbledore, not young Malfoy and he knew this. I accepted my death, not with open arms, but a gentle smile. Maybe I'd be back with you. its probably nothing more than a pipe dream, but a man can hope.
Hope... It keeps us all going. Hope for a new day. Hope for a new love. Hope for a returning love. So many things that we hope for never happen. But maybe I'll be a lucky bastard and it will carry me away and treat me well in the end.
There is blood. There is pain. And there is peace.
My time is slowly spilling away. Beat by beat my heart is getting weaker. And right when I know the end is upon me, he arrives. Oh how much he looks like his father, the same man that bested me in gaining your love. I hate how he looks... Except... Except for his eyes. Green and clear. Just like yours. I could not have a more welcome site (Than maybe you yourself) on my death bed. He tries to save me. A young boy who owes me nothing, tries to save me, but it is useless. My eyes are getting heavy and my mind foggy. I cry a few tears which he catches and I hope he learns of my past mistakes with you and never makes them himself. And I also hope, that I give some life to the ghost that are his father... And his mother.
Disclaimer: I do not own Harry Potter. *Sniffle*
This was inspried by the last movie I saw it ages ago but I just really now sat down to write it out. Please excuse all mistakes in grammar and spelling. Not my strong suit. Please read and review!
Later!