Title: Mutuality
Author: an-alternate-world
Rating: K+
Characters/Pairing: Connor Walsh/Oliver Hampton
Word Count: 545
Summary: Valentine's Day Tumblr Prompt: "Just because you like me doesn't mean the feeling is mutual."
Warnings/Spoilers: None in particular for this drabble.
Disclaimer: I am in no way associated with How To Get Away With Murder, ABC, Peter Nowalk, Shonda Rhimes, or anything else related to the ABC universe.

Anonymous prompted a Coliver Valentine's Day fic with: "Just because you like me doesn't mean the feeling is mutual."

Connor falters at Oliver's words, another piercing stab into his already aching heart. He feels about ready to rattle out of his skin after dodging the police for days about the discovery of Sam's body and now Oliver is just…

"But I thought we were-"

"Yeah, yeah, taking it slow," Oliver says, his voice distant, almost cold, "but you don't really want a relationship, do you?"

Connor looks away, inhaling deeply through his nose in an attempt to temper the tears he can feel brimming to the surface again. His emotions are completely out of control at the moment, his erratic moods enhanced by constant worrying.

"You're the only person I trust, Oliver," he whispers, straining around the pain in his throat. "You're the only person I… I want to be around…"

"But you still won't attend Narco meetings? You still won't tell me what drugs you're taking?" Oliver folds his arms over his chest and Connor realises what this is really about. His dishonesty about being high is going to be an ongoing issue and he can't back-pedal now. He can't tell the truth and covering the lie with more lies is just going to build an increasingly chaotic mess between them.

"Please, Oliver," he begs, an unbidden tear spilling down his cheek. "You don't understand…"

Oliver stares at him, his expression so unforgiving that Connor wonders what's happened, what's changed. He's been so careful not to put a toe out of line for weeks and now Oliver's freezing him out.

"What do you want me to say? I'll come to meetings?" he says, hands waving wildly around him. "Fine! But what I take is my business and-"

"Your business? You put your life at risk and expect me to-"

"Support me and allow me some courtesy in handling it privately," Connor interrupts over the top of Oliver's voice. Mostly he just needed more time to figure out which drugs he was 'most likely' to take so it sounded convincing to Oliver. "Please, Oliver. I'm scared to do this without you."

A muscle in Oliver's cheek twitches and he can see some of the ice in Oliver's expression melting. Connor thinks the tears streaking down his cheeks are probably doing a great job of helping - although they're 100% real because he can feel himself slipping away from Oliver, confused by his distance and hurting without his affection.

"I'm scared I'm going to lose you," Oliver admits, finally deflating and resting his hands on his hips. "I'm scared I'm just going to get a call that you're in the hospital and-"

"Ollie…" There's no way he can offer comforting words and explanations and reassurances for something he doesn't even do, but he knows he has to keep up the front. He approaches Oliver slowly until he can sink into the other man's familiar embrace. "I'll be okay. I know it doesn't sound like enough but…I will be."

Oliver's face nuzzled against his shoulder and neck, his fingers curling into Connor's shirt against his shoulder blades. "You're not the only one who's scared," Oliver mumbles against his skin.

Connor feels the guilt gnaw deeper in his belly as he grips Oliver tighter.

~FIN~