Chapter One Can Destiny Be Defeated?
"Only your magic can save him Merlin." Gaius said.
"I cannot save the life of a man destined to kill Arthur."
"If Mordred is destined to kill the King why has he just saved him?"
"I cannot ignore what the dragon has said."
"What happened to the young boy that came to my chambers a few years ago?"
"He grew up and learned the meaning of duty."
As the door of Gaius's chambers closed behind Gaius and Merlin, Mordred opened his eyes with a struggle. Throughout the last couple of days he had battled hard the magic that threatened his life. For the most part it seemed to stay in control of his senses. But every now and then Mordred fought hard enough, to regain his composure if just for a while.
As he re-lived the conversation he'd just overheard, his mind was in turmoil. According to what Merlin said, he Mordred was destined to kill Arthur. For a second he felt as if he wanted to laugh out loud, at the craziness of what he'd just heard. He was destined to kill King Arthur, a man he idolised. How was this possible? Surely it was a lie, an excuse for Merlin to not heal him.
No matter how much he tried to deny it to himself Mordred knew that Merlin did not trust him. At first he merely thought it had something to do with Mordred being with Ragnor. But once Mordred had saved Arthur's life he had assumed that Merlin would at least give him a chance to prove himself genuine.
But Mordred soon learnt that Merlin would give him no such guarantee. From the moment he arrived back he made it quite clear that he did not trust Mordred. Briefly Mordred thought back to his younger days, to how others would also treat him with suspicion, he still had no clear idea why. No one had ever said anything to him, what was it about him that made people fear him?
Mordred was so confused about how others saw him, that in the end it forced him to put his magic to one side altogether. It seemed to Mordred that his magic brought him nothing but trouble and strife. The people who had come in and out of his life were always more interested in his magic then they were about Mordred himself. That much life had taught him.
So he began his journey to discover himself first and foremost. What did he stand for? Who ultimately was he? He realised only by stepping outside of his magical shadow would he ever discover the truth about himself. When he became reunited with Morgana he had learnt a hard lesson. That blind hatred did not lead anyone to happiness and fulfilment.
It was only when he came to Camelot and became a Knight that for the first time in his life, he found himself accepted. He was treated just like everybody else. Mordred felt he belonged somewhere for the first time in his life. The other Knights became his friends, and Arthur a man whom the young man positively idolised, had become almost like a father to him.
There was only one person whom cast a shadow on Mordred's existance in Camelot, and he was probably the most important one to Mordred himself, Merlin. The man of the legends. The man whom Mordred had grown up learning and hearing about. The man who was going to lead his kind to their freedom and ultimate acceptence in the world at large.
To Mordred the blow was huge to his morale, and yet he was determined to change the warlock's opinion of him. So he went out of his way to try and talk to him. While Merlin was always polite to him a coldness in his manner remained. The distrustful looks kept shooting Mordred's way, so much so that at times he could hardly believe that he was the only one to notice.
But as he went on his first official quest with Arthur and the other Knights, when the search for Osgar was on, Mordred felt he had made a start with Merlin. For a brief moment the two of them had bonded as they stood over the sorcerer's grave, and Merlin had promised Mordred that one day all sorcerer's would be free again.
Mordred had felt so elated in that moment, yet by the time they had arrived at their stop over for the night, Merlin had put the shutters down once again, and the young man felt truly saddened. The only consolation he had was the respect he had from Arthur and the Knights. He felt as if he truly had become part of their world after his first successful quest.
When Arthur had gone on a second quest Mordred had managed to persuade his King to take him with him again. As Mordred rode out of Camelot he swore he would do everything for his King, and so when the Disir started started throwing their weapons towards Arthur, the young man did not hesitate to defend him, taking a full hit in the chest.
From that moment on he was in a hazy world, one that was sometimes filled with darkness but other times he was able to use his conciousness to fight back against the Disir's magic. Throughout his fight he would hear parts of conversations between Arthur and Merlin.
He was aware of how keen Arthur was for his life to be saved. But he was also aware of how Merlin did not seem too keen to heal him, and that scared him. Yet deep down he was not that surprised, after all he had always made it clear to Mordred, that he doubted him for some reason.
It was only when he was lying on the cot with Gaius and Merlin that he learnt how much Merlin doubted Mordred. Enough to allow him to die it seemed. And now all of a sudden Mordred had learnt why, because he according to Merlin was destined to kill Arthur.
As he closed his eyes he let the tears trickle down his face, still not wanting to believe the words he'd just heard. When they ceased Mordred swore he would do everything in his power to make sure such a thing did not come about. But first he had to find a way to persuade Merlin to cure him.