title. that time of year.
prompt. your otp fights about something silly
genre. humour
summary. au. "That's disgusting. Did you just mix the Ceasar dressing with the ice cream?" - dmhg
Drabble written entirely in dialogue. extremely out of character, ahaha.
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that time of year
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"Malfoy, what is that?"
"It's clothes. For the baby."
"Oh, that's nice- Wait, what?"
"Didn't you know? You're pregnant."
"WHAT?"
"Surprise."
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"Malfoy."
"…"
"Malfoy!"
"…"
"MALFOY!"
"…"
"What is it?"
"It's time for my check-up."
"Mhm…"
"Why are you still in bed? Get up!"
"Mhm…"
"We're going to find out if it's a boy or a girl-"
"It's a boy."
"Excuse me?"
"It's a boy."
"What if it's a girl?"
"It's a boy."
"But what if it's-"
"It's a boy."
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"Look what you did! We missed the check-up!"
"Don't look at me. You're the one who went off on a tangent."
"You know what? Just because all the firstborns in your family are boys does not mean our baby will be a boy as well. That's just ridiculous."
"It's not ridiculous. It's a fact. That baby will be a boy or so help me."
"You're impossible."
"And you're pregnant."
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"This is why I can't have nice things!"
"What is it?"
"Look at me! This doesn't fit me anymore! What am I going to wear to work?"
"Who said you were going to work?"
"But who will-"
"No."
"This is ridiculous! I'm going to work, Malfoy. So if you-"
"You're on maternity leave-"
"I'm two months pregnant! I'm fine!"
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"Malfoy, can you pass me the salad?"
"Here."
"And the ice cream?"
"Here."
"And the coconut juice?"
"Here."
"Why did you give me all of this? Are you trying to make me fat?"
"Oh, for Merlin's sake, woman. Just eat it already."
"…it's so good."
"That's disgusting. Did you just mix the Ceasar dressing with the ice cream?"
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"It's a boy."
"It's a girl."
"Boy."
"Girl."
"Boy."
"Girl."
"Boy."
"MALFOY IT WILL BE A GIRL, DO YOU HEAR ME? IT WILL BE A GIRL!"
"No."
"But-"
"No. Boy."
"You know what? Get out."
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"I need some Ceasar salad dressing."
"You're going to turn our baby into a salad at the rate you're going."
"Well, Emily will be a cute salad, so it's okay."
"Emily? It's going to be a boy."
"Screw you."
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"Malfoy I think my water broke."
"But my party-"
"MALFOY MY WATER JUST BROKE, I DON'T CARE IF IT'S YOUR FUNERAL, YOU'RE TAKING ME TO ST. MUNGO'S."
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"It's a boy?"
"It's a boy."
"Ha! Take that, woman!"
"And here's another one!"
"What?"
"And another one! Ahaha! How lovely!"
"..."
"..."
"..."
"...so are they all boys?"
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an. omg what did I just write? Ahaha. Written for the hpfanfictionprompts on tumblr. If you want to see my more serious attempt at the prompt, you could read 'the yellow leaf'. Thanks :)