Titles: Crooked Flowers
Pairing/s: None?
Disclaimer: for some reason my re-emergence into the animorphs fandom is happening right in the middle of my transition to adulthood and i've lost control of my life
Summary: "We'll save him, Ax."
"Alright, so since Jake's not gonna ask, Tobias definitely isn't gonna ask, and if Marco asks, you'll just lie, I guess it's up to me: why did you decide to stay in the military?"
Cassie tries never to pry. But it's been almost four years since a young Andalite aristh with too much to prove landed on the planet Earth, and they've all learned that if you don't pry Ax (or punch him, or spy on him), you likely aren't going to get an answer at all. So Cassie pushes him sometimes. They all do, because Ax is different. (Ax isn't like Jake.)
Her friend swings his stalk eyes in her direction and shrugs. [I had just been promoted to Prince,] he told her. [It made sense for me to stay.]
"Bullshit. Try again."
Ax frowns. [I… like being in charge?]
This time, Cassie laughs. "Ax, we both know that while you're probably an excellent leader, you like being in charge about as much as Marco would like living in a convent. Once more, the truth this time."
Ax heaves a heavy sigh through his nose. He's been doing that a lot lately, Cassie's noted. Not just sighing—shrugging, nodding, spreading his hands when he speaks. Part of Cassie thinks it's because he's just spent too much time around humans for his own good. The other part knows it's an unconscious defiance to the Andalite fleet. Human gestures are not exactly something they approve of.
It's been almost a year since the war ended. The trial of Visser Three is looming in. The Animorphs will be together again (the few that remain, anyway), and Jake—Jake's just gone. Cassie has no idea how he's going to make it through the next few weeks. She has no idea how she's going to make it through the next few weeks.
She looks back to Ax and feels her fear and worry melt a little. She's always had a bit of a special bond with the Andalite. She knows he'd never admit it out loud, but she thinks she might be special to him, too. Special like Tobias and Jake were.
(Cassie wonders when she started referring to Animorphs relationships in the past tense.)
[My brother ran from the war once], Ax says finally, his stalk eyes lowering. [It nearly destroyed him. I do not think I would be able to handle it so well.]
"Elfangor quit the war because he hated it," Cassie argues. "He came back because he was needed. You're not needed out there chasing sceptres, Ax, you're needed right here." A little of her frustration seeps out and she curses inwardly. There's so few of them left these days. Jake's gone. Tobias is gone. Marco is—Marco tries to forget the war ever happened. There is no one else out there who understands, and Cassie needs that understanding so much. She needs a friend and it feels like there's no one out there who can be that for her anymore.
(Rachel's gone, too, a part of her mind whispers, but she slams it out with a bang.)
It takes a moment for her to realize Ax is gazing at her with his main eyes. She looks up, meets them, follows the direction his stalk eyes are staring.
Rachel's gravestone. Flowers are there, obviously recent, obviously hand-picked with the greatest love. But there is an air of terrible guilt hanging over them. The sit crookedly and distant from the mountain of other flowers that veil the monument. They seem thinned out and frail, crumpled and worn. And all of a sudden, Cassie understands why Ax won't stay.
[My brother ran from the war once. It almost destroyed him.]
Ax wasn't talking about Elfangor.
When Cassie finally speaks, her voice is slow and sure.
"We'll save him, Ax," she tells him. "We're Animorphs. We saved the planet once. It might take awhile longer, but I know we can save Jake, too."
fin