Phil looked around the alley, making sure that there was no one around to see the two of them. He turned back around to face the other male. "You got the money, right?" The man asked, looking at him warily. "OF course I do." Phil replied, slipping his hand into his pocket. The money was not his, though. It didn't have to be anyway. It was his best friend's money. Dan didn't know that he had taken it. He didn't know where Phil was, and Phil didn't want him to. He was ashamed of his secret, and he never wanted anyone to find out. After all, who would want to even be friends with a drug addict?
Dan sighed as he closed his laptop. being stuck inside all day was so boring. then he had an idea. he quickly put on his coat and shoes then picked up his phone and keys. a nice walk was just what he needed. he locked the door then went in the lift. he was soon walking through streets. he slowed as he saw two figures in an alleyway.
"You know what, you are one of my best costumers." The man said, looking into Phil's blue eyes. "And since you are, I will give you a deal. You let me have a go at you, and I'll give you a discount on your next buy." Phil hesitated, not knowing what to say. Would it be worth doing it with a stranger, just to get more drugs? "I don't know." He replied, looking down at the ground
Dan stepped into the alleyway. he blinked a few times before gasping quietly. it was Phil. he was frozen in place, he had no idea what to do. he slowly stepped forward "P-Phil?" he asked in a shaky voice.
"Dan!" Phil gasped, jumping slightly. "What are you doing here?" He asked, now angry. He ignore as the other man looked between Dan and him.
"I was just taking a walk when...what are you even doing, just here in a dark alleyway" he asked even though he was pretty sure he knew the answer
"None of your business." Phil said. He grabbed Phil by the arm, and dragged him to the end of the alley. "Go back to whatever you were doing." He hated being rude to Dan, hated having to lie to him, but it was necessary. He couldn't know. Nobody could.
Dan suddenly felt angry. "Phil!" she shouted, an annoyed look on his face "your coming with me right now" he walked over to Phil and grabbed his arm, dragging him towards their flat.
"No Dan!" Phil pulled his arm away from Dan. "I am not going." He turned around to look at the man, worried as he saw the impatient look on his face. He would leave if he didn't hurry.
"NO!" he almost glared at Phil "you're coming with me now, you can fuck your boyfriend later!" he spat almost hateful
"He is not my boyfriend!" Phil yelled. "I just don't want to leave!" He turned around, wanting to turn away from Dan. He could feel tears begin to fill his eyes.
"Phil" he said in a stern voice "come with me right now" he made a grab for Phil's arm turning him around to look into his eyes "I don't care /what/ your doing with him, we're going home now" he said through gritted teeth.
Tears spilled down tears Phil's cheeks. "Please, Dan," He whispered, feeling pitiful. "I need it." He said, his voice breaking. "I need it."
Dan quickly wrapped his arms around Phil "lets go home please" he said with a shaky voice, he could feel his own tears stinging his eyes "please Phil"
"No." Phil looked up. "Just let me get it first." He looked into Dan's eyes, his heart breaking as he realized he was hurting Dan by not leaving with him. But he needed it. He had to get it.
Dan let go of Phil. he gave him a quick nod then looked to the ground, he didn't want Phil to see the tears he could now feel slipping down his cheeks.
Phil walked towards the man, taking the money out. "Here, now give me the stuff." He waited till the man gave him the drugs. He looked down at the white powder, feeling relief. He handed the money to the man, and then watched him walk away. He turned around back to Dan, putting the drugs away. "O-ok." He said, feeling his chest go up and down. "We can go now."
Dan quickly turned on his heals and sobbed as he began walking back towards the flat. he didn't look up at Phil once as they walked. he felt so angry yet so upset. he knew if he even tried to talk to Phil he would just explode. they eventually got back to the flat, Dan quickly opened the door.
As soon as Dan opened the door, Phil practically ran into his room. He locked the door behind him, and went to the side of his bed. He took out what he was looking for. He opened a box, and took out all of the object it contained inside. Before he realized what he was doing, he started preparing the drug. He ignore the bangs on his door, as he sobbed. How had he gotten here? His last resort of happiness being cocaine.
Dan sighed as he went to his own room, there was no point trying to talk to Phil. he layed on his bed and stared up at the ceiling. so his best friend was a drug addict. great. just when he though life couldn't get anymore complicated. it was hard enough being in love with his best friend. he knew he had to help Phil, he had no idea how but he had too. he sighed heavily as he closed his eyes.
Phil smiled happily as he snorted up the drugs. God it felt amazing. He hated it, and yet loved it. He laid in his bed, staring up at the ceiling. He sighed, and giggled. Why didn't everyone do this? They should. He slowly fell asleep, forgetting about all of his worries. He would work them out as they came.
Dan sighed as he walked out his room and too the bathroom. he quickly locked the door then rummaged through the cabinet until he found what he was looking for. a razor. tears came to his eyes as he rolled up his sleeve. he hated his scars they were so ugly, yet, he couldn't stop doing this. sure Phil was a drug addict but at least he wasn't freak that self harmed. Dan's vision blurred as the tears began to pour down his face. he brought the blade to his wrist then cut lightly. he only wanted pain. he knew how to kill himself yet he was too scared to do it. he sobbed loudly as he continued to cut. he soon sunk to the floor and curled up into a ball as he held his stinging wrist.
Phil woke up to the sound of Dan's sobs. He got up, not wanting to remind himself of the events from last night. He walked towards the bathroom, and knocked. "Dan, you alright there?"
Dan tried to stop his sobs but he couldn't. he just sobbed louder as he heard Phil's voice. he hated himself right now. everyone should hate him. he was cutting himself all just because his best friend didn't love him. yeah. great reason Dan.
He heard Dan's sobs increased. "Dan! Please open the door!" He knocked on the door once again, this time more urgently
Dan pulled his sleeve down, covering the cuts. he then walked to the door and unlocked it. he probably looked like shit but he didn't care anymore. he continued to sob lightly as he opened the door slowly
Phil pulled Dan into a hug as soon as he opened the door. They both needed one. He pulled away, looking at the tears in Dan's eyes. He saw the way Dan kept fiddling with the sleeve of his shirt. Phil gasped as he realized what he had just been doing. "Dan.." He sighed, taking Dan's wrist with his hand gently.
Dan pulled his wrist away "n-no...you cant..." he bit his lip "you'll hate me...I..." he began to sob again, clenching his fists slightly
Phil looked into Dan's eyes once more. "I could never hate you." He said, meaning it. He couldn't hate him more than he hated himself. "I am surprised that /you/ don't hate me."
"how could I ever hate you Phil, I love-" he covered his mouth with his other hand. he stared with wide eyes at Phil. he had just told Phil he loved him. fuck.
Phil's eyes widened as he heard Dan's words. Or at least what he almost said. Did he mean it..? "What were you about to say?" He asked, stroking Dan's cheek with the hand that wasn't holding his wrist.
Dan shook his head and closed his eyes. he couldn't say it again
"Please, Dan. I need to hear it." He said, feeling tears fill his eyes. He had never cried this much before in his life.
"I...I love you okay!" he almost shouted as he tried to cover his face as he cried. there he'd said it. even if Phil had wanted him to say he was sure Phil would still hate him. everyone did.
Phil stood there, frozen. He had dreamed many times of hearing those words, and finally hearing them made his heart fluttered. He cupped Dan's cheek, and slowly pulled him into a kiss. It was short, but it had the passion that they both had been withholding since the day they had met.
Dan felt Phil's against his. he didn't know what to do. all he could do was cry. such a wonderful had happened yet he was still crying. why?. he lightly pulled down the sleeve of his jumper as he caught sight of one of his cuts. he couldn't let thsoe ugly things ruin this beautiful moment.
Phil pulled away, looking confused as Dan cried even more. He saw as Dan kept pulling down at his sleeves. He smiled sadly. "Dan, don't worry, we'll get through this, You are beautiful, and I don't care if you have scars. I will try to forget about the drugs. Just please, never leave me." He said. "I love you. I don't know what I would do without you in my life."
Dan hugged him tightly, smiling for the first time in a while. "thank you so much" he whispered "I love you so much it's unreal"
Phil chuckled as Dan leaned against him. "I know what you mean." He said, wrapping his arms around him. "We'll get through this, together." He kissed his cheek.
"i hope so anyway..." Dan whispered sadly. he knew his problem could be stopped but Phil's was much more serious. he really didn't know how to help him.
Phil felt as Dan tensed against him. "What's wrong?"
He looked into Phil's eyes with a sad smile "I just feel so...worthless. you can help me with my problem but...I cant...really help you at all...I just..." he trailed of biting his lip.
Phil held Dan even closer. "Don't worry, when the time comes, we will face the problem. And with you here with me, I will get better. I have everything I've ever wanted. You." He smiled.
Dan buried his head into Phil's chest "I love you, I love you so much" he whispered softly
"I love you too. Words can't explain how much I love you." Phil leaned forward, to kiss Dan for the second time. This time the kiss was longer, and he loved every second of it. "Don't ever leave me, please." He whispered into Dan's ear as they broke apart.
"I'll never leave i promise, no matter what I'll always be with you" he smiled softly
"Good." Phil kissed the top of Dan's head. "That's just what I wanted."