Pinkie sat in the middle of her room, her usual bright pink cotton candy mane was dull, straight and lifeless, her eyes showed none of her 'pinkie' sparkle that everypony seemed to love, nor did her face have a great big smile plastered on it. The room was dark and gloomy as the curtains were drawn tightly shut, the bright colours of her walls now seemed dark, boring and gray. Pinkie was sat on a small wooden stall, looking at her own reflection in the mirror. The mare sighed, her eyes staring back at her own. All she wanted was to be happy, really happy this time, not just that fake smile she would put on every day. She couldn't remember the last time she actually felt happy, she always just felt... empty. The pink mare started to talk to her own reflection.
"Why do I always have to be the pony to fill the silence?"But Pinkie already knew the answer. She hated the silence because it screamed the truth; she was a boring old ugly earth pony that had nothing going for her. Maybe she had her friends, but then that didn't properly count because she lied to them all the time, they didn't know the real her.
"Hey Pinkie, how you doing?"
"GREAT thanks Dashie!"
"Hey Pinkie great party last night, you seem to be having a lot recently!"
"Oh well you know how much I LOVE LOVE LOVE them AJ!"
Pinkie had always hated her parties, she knew that she was good at them but she still hated them, this just made her feel worse as she felt she had to do to do them, it was her duty. She knew how much her 'friends' enjoyed them, so it would just be selfish to stop them! The mare started to get angry, why did SHE have to feel like this? What had SHE done to deserve it? She was always there to cheer ponies up, however, who was there to cheer her up? Her pink hooves crashed down the colourful blue dresser, they both slid sidewards, smashing everything that once sat on top of the dresser to the hard wooden floor. Her breaths were sharp and quick, anger flooded though her as she jumped to her feet, pushing the stall downwards with a crash. The earth pony glared around her room. She had started to hate all the bright colours, it hurt her eyes. With anger pumping though her veins she attempted to break all her colourful possessions, unfortunately that was a lot of things.
"WHY IS MY CUTIE MARK THE ONLY CUTIE MARK THAT'S A LIE? IT'S NOT FAIR, IT'S NOT FAIR, IT'S... not fair..." Pinkies outburst used up most of her energy and before she finished talking, she was back in front of the mirror, silent tears falling along the hot pink fur. She stared at herself, her cyan eyes glistening from fresh tears. Why did she have to go through this...? It just wasn't fair.
"I don't want to be the pony that laughs the loudest; I don't want to be that pony that never wants to be alone. It's not me." Her eyes were tightly shut; her head ached from these sudden mood changes. Minutes ticked by, each second seemed to last forever until Pinkie Pie finally opened her eyes. Her heart was beating heard in her chest, even in just a few minutes pinkie had changed. (That pony really could do anything) The old Pinkie who loved to party was long gone, and as pinkie realised this, the empty feeling within her went, replaced with nothing, she had become numb inside. She was done with seeing herself cry time after time, never again. Never again will she brake down in agony. No pain inside. She couldn't never stop smiling now, she realised what she had to live for, to make others happy. No pain inside. Her hoof seemed to shake as she picked up a small, sharp and shiny object. No pain inside. 'Carry on smiling' the pink mare thought to herself as she placed the object in her mouth, she rested it in one corner of her mouth before pulling up and diagonal, like a smile. No pain inside. The sharp object tugged slightly as she looked as herself in the mirror. I can never stop smiling. With one quick pull the pink party pony would never stop smiling again.
No pain inside.