Hello. My name is Kylie, formally known as Empress Jing of Jin . Welcome to my talk show, Dynasty Chat. Let me explain to you what it is and how it works.

Dynasty Chat is a talk show that I host and ask your (meaning my) favorite Dynasty Warriors and Dynasty Warriors couples questions that you (meaning me again) want answered.

Because of the fact I have very limited creative abilities, I allow my readers to send in questions that they have (leaving the name of the Warrior or couple that you wish to be interviewed).

With that said, I also have a co- host who is running fashionably late (did I mention that I also have EXTREMELY limited patience?).

10 minutes later

We're going to go ahead and begin (Dylan has been fired). Today, I will be interviewing the evil emperor, Cao Pi.

(He comes out from behind stage and seats himself across from me)

Me: Welcome to Dynasty Chat, Cao Pi! How are you today?

Cao Pi: *Glares at me* I'll be fine when you quit wasting my time.

Me: *Frowning* Well then. First Question is from author DeathsColdEmbrace.

Why did you die your hair?

Cao Pi: I never died my hair. The Koei people did. Besides, black hair is better. So yeah… Next question.

Me: *Still frowning at him for his rudeness in taking my line* The next question is from author DeathsColdEmbrace again.

Why are you always frowning?

Cao Pi: *Still frowning* What is the reason to walk around smiling like an idiot for?

Me: *Bored by Cao Pi* The next question is from an anonymous fan.

Will you go on a date with me?

Cao Pi: *Smirking* That depends on what you look like, my dear.

Me: Aren't you married, Zihuan?

Cao Pi: I am married to many women. Why?

Me: If you are married, why are you trying to catch a date with someone? To be exact, someone you don't even know. How would that make Zhen Ji feel? Or that piece of trash Guo Nuwang? How would they feel?

Cao Pi: I can care less about how Zhen feels.

Me: What about Nuwang and the thousands of other wives you have?

Cao Pi: Do you mind?

Me: Mind what?

Cao Pi: You are annoying.

Me: I know you are.

Cao Pi: *Glaring* If you are not going to say anything productive, leave me be.

Me: If you were not prepared for one of the questions, you should have informed me of what you did not want to talk about. *Look back at the camera* The next question is from author Element Life!

Exactly how many wives and children do you have?

Cao Pi: A lot.

Me: How many?

Cao Pi: *Stares at me*

Me: *Stares back at him*

Cao Pi: *Smirks deviously*

Zhen Ji: *Running towards Cao Pi* YOU MONSTER! *Takes her shoe off and chunks it at Cao Pi*

Cao Pi: *Gets hit in the head and is now unconscious*

Me: We are experiencing marriage difficulties. Please enjoy the following pointless commercials as we go to break.

5 minutes later

Me: *Staring at Cao Pi* Welcome back to Dynasty Chat! With the…situation we had corrected, we can now continue interviewing Cao Pi.

Me: *Sighs* Next question is from author DeathsColdEmbrace…again.

Are you loyal?

Cao Pi: *Holding an icepack to his head* … Hell no. Why would I be loyal to anyone if I don't have to?

Me: Are you loyal to your people?

Cao Pi: You mean am I loyal to Wei? Why wouldn't I be? I am the kingdoms emperor.

Me: Next question is from author IgNighted.

What would you have done if you had lived longer? Do you trust Sima Yi and would Cao Rui be your heir I mean because they turned kind of sucky for you.

Cao Pi: …I would have found out where you live and beaten you up. I'm sure any of my inferiors would have done the same.

Me: *Blinks* Next question is from Fangirl98!

Why are you always glaring?

Cao Pi: *Pissed off*

Cao Pi: Can you read?

Me: I'm reading the questions, aren't I?

Cao Pi: …Do you have any grapes?

Me: Hey! I'm the one asking the questions. Not you.

Cao Pi: *Glares and spits on the floor*

Me: *Shocked and disgusted* Eww! Why would you do that? Clean it up!

Cao Pi: *Gets up and walks away, pulling a bag of grapes out of his pocket and eating them on his way*

Me: *Looking at the spit* Um… That's all for today people. Until next time! *Yells at the custodian* Get this cleaned up!

A/N: The authors used in today's interview were randomly selected. I just came up with Fangirl98, wherefore I doubt she is real. Next week I will be interviewing my husband, Sima Yi. If you have any questions for him, please leave them in your review.