A/N: It's been awhile since I've written for Grey's, but this has been saved on my computer for far too long. Thank you for reading and please remember to review at the end, ox
Disclaimer: I do not own Grey's Anatomy.
~x~
The room was q u i e t.
It took a good ten minutes to fully understand what had happened.
Alex punched the gallery window as hard as he could. His world went black and nothing seemed to be working. "Izzie!" He cried, "Please, no!"
Meredith stood, stunned. Tears stained her face, "Alex, stop." Trying her best to stop his now bloody fist from hitting whatever it could.
"Izzie! Don't... no, please" He cried harder then he punched.
Cristina sat there; blanked face, emotionless. What happened?
She could heard voices in the background, but she couldn't make them out. It was all a blur... All that seemed to be going through her mind was the endless beeping of the machine indicating that it was over.
George O'Malley, now Izzie Stevens. Who the hell was next?
Dr. Bailey leaned over, tears hitting the poor girl's body beneath her. How could this be?
Derek's eyes were shut, "Damn it." he wispered. This was his fault, how could he have let this happen? He had her, and then he lost her.
He saved lives, not lose them.
In a split second everything changed.
In the gallery window, were the faces that would haunt him forever.
He looked up and felt the pain of those strarring faces run through his body like an electric shock.
"Time of death..."
-
"Karev?" Chief said. His office was s i l e n t. It was ripping him apart.
Alex sat there, eyes glued towards the ground. It was obvious of his lack of sleep. Red swollen eyes from crying. It was obvious.
He finally spoke up.
Dead face, dead expression, dead soul, dead.
"I'm sorry chief, I'm sorry. I have to, I need to. There's... I-" He tryied to find the right words to say, but honestly, what do you say in a situation like this? It was over, everything changed in a single minute. "I can't... I- There's nothing left sir. There's nothing left for me! I have nothing left here."
Nothing at all.
-
They packed his clothes in utter s i l e n c e, both completly lost in their own thoughts.
She didn't want him to leave. She can't bare to lose another one. Why? Why were they all leaving her? They can't do that.
Alex placed the last pair of jeans into the suitcase and walked over to his window. Everything was so still, so fragile, so peaceful, so q u i e t. It seemed as if nothing in the world could ever be wrong. Everything was so... right. But it wasn't, everything was all different and nothing will be the same.
He cries, every night. More than you could possibly imagine. It's draining out all of his energy. He can't take this anymore. He needs to breath, to escape, to live, to smile again.
But that seems to be impossible now.
He took a deep breath and closed his eyes, forcing the tears to not slip out, fighting back the pain.
He listened to Meredith as she zipped up the last suitcase. "Alex?" He turned around to face her. Their experssions were the same: agony, "we're done."
It seemed like happiness was all the way across the universe.
-
He slammed the car door shut behind him.
This was the right thing to do, he had no other choice.
He backed out of the driveway and looked up at the house for the last time.
He had a life here. A great job, amazing friends, a beautiful wife. It all seemed unreal. It was paradise compared to his childhood. But now, nothing could seem like that again. This, this right now - the emptyness - it is killing him.
Little by little, soon there will be nothing left but p i e c e s.
He's going home. Back to Iowa, home to his mother. He figured it's for the best.
He needed to be away from here, away from it all. Too many painfully memories that couldn't be handelled.
He couldn't bare the s i l e n c e. It's all too much and he just wanted it all to end.
He had said his goodbye's and thank you's to everyone who had c h a n g e d his life these past years.
He looked at her and nodded towards her.
She closed her eyes and nodded back, allowing a small smile appear on her lips.
It hurt for him to smile, he was almost positive he forgot how.
This was it.
Someday he'll return, when he's ready. Someday when he is able to let love back into his heart. Someday when he's able to smile.
Someday...
So, he is ready for a new chapter in his life.
He was ready to take on the long journey home.
Alex took a deep breath. He looked at the road ahead of him and drove away, leaving Meredith in the doorway with tears streaming down her face.
Everything changed in a second, why did it happen?
~x~
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