Title: "Conspiracies"

Author: Wish Wielder

Fandom: Doctor Who

Pairing / Character Focus: (Tenth) Doctor x Rose Tyler

Challenge: Say What?! An Unusual First Line Reunion Challenge

Theme / Prompt: "Doctor, quick question. Hypothetically, if there was some bloke callin' himself the Master about to destroy the planet…what would you do?"

Word Count: 1,416

Rating: K Plus / PG

Summary: The TARDIS, the multiverse, and Jack – all of them, he decided, were conspiring against him.

Notes: Slight spoilers if you haven't seen the end of S3. There's no excuse for this, other than I had that song stuck in my head when I read the line…

Disclaimer: "Doctor Who" and all respective properties are © the BBC. Megan D. (Wish Wielder) does not, has never, nor will ever own "Doctor Who".

"Conspiracies"

The TARDIS was conspiring against him. There was absolutely no other explanation for it.

It had started a few days ago, when he had left Donna and Martha in Cardiff for some shore leave. A little well-earned R-n-R while he went off to help a rebellion on Box. The TARDIS had decided to land fifty years out of date, landing him in a jail cell that had been, as jail cells go, less than hospitable. It had been an overall dump that left him longing for that cell he had shared with Rose on Jira 8, the worst being that it had a deadlock-sealed door. He never should've taken that long to free himself, a fact that almost made him glad Rose was in Pete's World. She never would have let him live that down…

When he had finally made it back to Cardiff, a week had passed. He had found Donna and Martha at Torchwood, laughing with Gwen and Jack about an alien invasion they had thwarted while he was gone – with the help of 'an old friend' he'd be 'ecstatic to see'. They wouldn't say who; Jack just told him to go back to the TARDIS. He had been wary of that; if the 'old friend' was on his ship, he really hoped it was because Martha or Donna had given him (or her) one of their keys. But leaving him (or her) on the TARDIS alone…

Well, now that he was back on board and actually looking (ok, staring…gawking…spluttering like an idiot…) at this old friend, he could say he didn't mind. Much. Granted, a universe somewhere had probably imploded in the past week, but…yeah, he was ecstatic. Now if he could just get his mouth to work properly enough to say "Hello", or at least take his eyes off her for a moment…

But back to his point, the Doctor was fairly sure the TARDIS was conspiring against him. Otherwise she would have told him about the universal disturbance that had resulted in Rose Tyler standing in her console room. Or Rose Tyler being back in this universe in general. Preferably before he reached this moment of shock, where all he could do was gawk as she stroked the central column.

And yes, she was stroking the central column. She had a hand steadying herself on the console as she reached up with the other to run it along the glass tube. To top it off, she was grinning like an idiot and…and…talking to her. His hearts swelled at that; it had been too long since a companion had accepted the old girl was really alive. And as he stood there, smiling and gawking and just drinking in the sight of her, she turned to face him. Her smile widened, and it was almost painful; Rassilon, he had forgotten how beautiful she was…

And that's when he decided that it wasn't just the TARDIS conspiring against him; it was the multiverse in general.

"Doctor! Quick question – hypothetically, if there was some bloke callin' himself the Master about to destroy the planet…what would you do?" she asked, and it was like the glass shattering. He was spluttering out confused "What?"s for an entirely different reason than he should've been, and the twitch that had come from the need to touch her turned into one of nervous panic.

"Granted, Mr. Saxon seemed like a nice 'nough bloke, aside from trying to get me to marry him and all, but when your president starts callin' himself your 'lord and Master' you start to realize there's a bit of a problem there," she continued, and his jaw dropped at the casual way she referred to his old friend…enemy…frenemy!

…oh, he liked that word…

He wasn't entirely sure what to say when his TARDIS seemed to answer for him. There was a sound like a warped record going out of an imposed pause, and then the speakers burst to life with a song he knew wasn't in his audiocube…

"Here it goes, here it goes, here it goes again – oh here it goes again!"

"…what?!" he finally snapped as the second verse started. He looked from the ceiling to Rose, who was biting her lip and…trying not to laugh. He quirked a brow at her, and she nodded towards the door.

"Jack's idea," she said. "Thought it'd be funny. Can't say he was wrong – you look like your brain just imploded."

"What?!" he asked again, and she shrugged. "Jack…but…what?!"

Rose patted the console, and the Ok Go track stopped mid-chorus. She turned back to him and paused, and he almost felt guilty at the look of shock (he'd call it fear, but he didn't want to think she was scared of him) that crossed her face. His eyes narrowed, his gaze shifting between her and the central column. Right. Very funny.

"So…you're not here because the Master's about to destroy Pete's World?" he asked, just to clarify.

"Right," she said, and he nodded.

"And you only said that because Jack thought it'd be funny?"

"Right," she said again, and he pushed out a heavy breath in a sigh as he turned around. Without another word, he began marching down the ramp, fully intent on giving Jack a piece of his vastly superior mind. That is until Rose's voice stopped him at the door.

"Oi!" she called, and he paused with his hand on the latch. He looked back to find her with her hands on her hips, and that's when he decided that this really was not fair. She'd had a week – possibly longer – to prepare to see him again. He, well…hadn't! And here she was, smiling and grinning and making cheap shots at the Master, and all he wanted to do was…was…well, hug her. Take her hand and tell her to run. Granted, a snog would be nice, but he really just wanted a hug.

And killing Jack a few times wouldn't hurt, either…

Oh, she was looking at him…and those were her angry eyes. The ones that told him he was about to be slapped – usually because she had just said something important and he hadn't been listening…

"Erm, come again?" he asked, and she rolled her eyes and – Rassilon help him – he winced. He actually winced.

"I asked what you were doing," she said. She looked to the controls and ran a hand along the console's edge. She sighed, throwing on a rejected sort of look. "Y'know, I would've thought I'd at least get a hug, after all this time. I mean, I did cross the Void for you – though I'm not quite sure how. Still, sure I could find my way back again, if you really don't want me here…"

"No!" he cried, leaping forward with an outstretched hand. She glanced up, a slight smile tugging her lips, and he knew he was – for lack of a better term – screwed. With a couple billion "really"s thrown before it. He pulled his hand back, instinctively reaching back to scratch his neck. "Erm, it's not that I'm not glad to see you – I really am, honest! It's just…I was…and…oh, sod it – I really cocked this up, didn't I? Mind, you were no help…what are you smiling at?"

"Nothing, just…forgot how you could go on like that," she said, her smile twinkling in her eyes. She walked over to the top of the ramp, and he blinked at her outstretched hand. "Shall we try this again?"

"I'd like that very much," he said, and he wasn't sure if the sigh that came out was relieved or grateful. He paused at the grin that curved those (lovely, kissable) lips, and he started and laughed as she threw her arms out and shouted, "Surprise!"

Well, it wasn't exactly the best first line, but it was a decided improvement over the last one…

"Oh, just c'mere," he said, opening his arms wide for her. She laughed and ran at him, and he caught her in a massive hug that lifted her off her feet as he spun her around. He put her down, and she squeezed his shoulders as she lifted her head to his ear.

"I've missed this – missed you," she said, and he couldn't agree more.

"Just…next time Jack tells you to say something because he thinks it'll be funny, don't," he said. He reluctantly stepped back to see her nod. He smiled and cupped a hand against her cheek, his thumb brushing beneath her eye. "Right…time to kill Jack!"