A/N: Valentine's Day (or rather several Valentine's Days) on the more contemplative side of things. Implied onesided TxA, mentions of RxY, RxM, and some slight TxY, if you're looking for it.
The Valentine After Him
It was so cold. The bitter wind bit right through her jacket and her thin knitted gloves. Her tears felt like they were freezing on her cheeks. She rubbed them away with a gloved hand as she hurried down the sidewalk as fast as she could. She had wanted to make it home, but afraid she'd turn into a popsicle before she made it there, she went into a small convenience store on the way.
It was warm, deliciously warm. Téa sighed in relief as the cold melted away from her body. She chose an aisle at random and browsed through it, only to be confronted with a large red and pink Valentine's display. It wasn't exactly surprising, considering today was February 14th, but Téa had been unprepared for it. She bit her lip and slowly pasted on the bright, cheery smile she'd been wearing all day, the one that said she couldn't be happier that today was Valentine's Day. She forced herself to cheerfully examine the pink polka-dotted teddy bears on display, for all the world like she didn't care, like she'd never been hurt, like she'd never loved, like she'd never lost.
The smile faltered on her lips. She gripped the stuffed bear and clutched it close to her heart. The tears began to trickle down her cheeks again, but this time she didn't wipe them away. Anyone walking past the aisle would have seen a teenage girl standing in the middle of the convenience store crying her eyes out while she squeezed a cheap teddy bear, but she didn't care. It was the first Valentine's Day after him, and Téa Gardener was not okay.
……
She felt his eyes on her, watching expectantly. She smiled. "It's cute, Yugi. It's really sweet. Thanks so much."
He smiled. "You're welcome."
Téa tucked the Valentine's card he had given her into her backpack, not letting her smile slip for an instant. Yugi was a good friend and his thoughtfulness meant a lot to her. But it was hard to accept the bright-colored card from him when she was wondering, always wondering, whether, if things had been different, if it could have been from him.
She glanced up to see Yugi's eyes still on her and now they had a questioning look. She quickly deflected him. "What's that you're holding?" she asked playfully as she arched her eyebrows at the pink envelope in his hand. "Is that from Rebecca?"
"Y-yeah." Red suffused his cheeks.
"Well, what does it say?"
Yugi's eyes twisted up pleadingly at her, but she was not going to yield. At his reticence, she plucked the card from his hands and read it aloud. "My darling Yugi, I had hoped that we would be able to share this day together, but because we are so far apart, this trifling card will have to suffice. I miss you soooo much, and I can't wait until the day we are reunited. All my love from now to eternity, your valentine, Rebecca Hawkins." She paused as she finished the card, unsure of what to say. "Well, your girlfriend's got a big vocabulary, I'll say that for her."
"She's not my girlfriend, Téa," Yugi protested.
Téa dismissed his comment. "Yeah, whatever, Yugi." She struggled to keep the sudden stab of bitterness out of her voice. What exactly was it about the way the Hawkins girl gushed over Yugi that twisted this thorn in her heart? Did it have to do with Rebecca? Yugi? Or was it simply that these were the words she would never, ever get to say? All my love, from now to eternity. Téa swallowed.
"Téa?" Yugi was looking at her with concern. "Téa, are you alright?"
She nodded softly, and that old fake smile fell into its old familiar place on her face again. Only, it didn't feel quite so fake as it used to. She picked up her backpack and waved at Yugi before she walked out of the doors, head high. It was the second Valentine's Day after him, and Téa didn't feel like spending it crying.
…..
It had snowed last night and now a thick white blanket lay snug against the snow-capped houses. No snowplow had come by yet; the road was still as pristinely white as the lawn. A few footprints marked up the snow here and there, but mostly it stretched out in glittering purity. Téa couldn't resist. She pulled on gloves, snow boots, and a thick coat, and went for a walk.
There was an almost eerie stillness to the neighborhood. There weren't many children in Téa's neighborhood, but still she thought that someone would be out celebrating their freedom from school. But maybe no one felt like celebrating. After all, the snow had picked a terribly inconvenient day to fall. Today was Valentine's Day. No school meant no pink and red cards stuffed into lockers, no chocolates exchanged among friends, and no breathless possibility that a certain special someone would take notice this year.
Well, Téa had no special someone, so it wasn't a terrible loss. In fact, it was almost a relief not to have to endure school today. All the Valentine drama, the giggling girls, the yearly spectacle of Kaiba tossing out all his valentines unopened, the boys mooning after their respective girls…who needed it? Who needed it when it was the third Valentine's Day after him, and she…
She opened her wide in shock. She didn't mind. She searched her feelings, probing her heart for any dormant sentiments of heartbreak or lingering love. None. There was still the layer of grief, she still missed him, she still wished, in a way, that he hadn't had to leave them. But that was all, only her healing grief for a lost friend. Gone was the rush of emotion that his name used to inspire, the wild beating of her heart, followed by the stabbing pain. She didn't feel the sting of rejection anymore or wallow in loneliness or self-pity. She wasn't in love with him anymore.
"Was I ever?" she whispered, "or was it only ever a crush?" A crush, like the one Rebecca had on Yugi. It seemed so childish, but then she had been younger when she had first met him, and she couldn't deny that the feelings he had stirred up in her then now seemed too cheesy to be taken seriously. A crush. She had spent all this time mooning over a stupid schoolgirl crush. She wasn't sure if she felt like laughing or crying. She looked down at the snow and she wondered if it would be terribly childish of her to make a snow angel.
"Téa? What are you doing?"
She opened her eyes to see Yugi standing over her with a puzzled expression. She grinned up at him. "What does it look like? I'm making snow angels."
"Oh." He stared at her for a moment longer and then smiled. "Well, could I join you?"
"Sure." He lay down in the snow, and though Téa couldn't see him anymore, she could hear him waving his arms and crunching snow beside her. "So, what did you come here for?" she asked.
He hesitated a second. "Well, I have a valentine for you," he said at last.
"Aw, thanks Yugi. You didn't have to walk all the way over here in the snow, though. You could have just given it to me at school tomorrow."
"Well, I didn't want to. I wanted you to have it today."
Téa didn't know what to say. "That's sweet," she murmured finally. Feeling embarrassed and not knowing why, she turned the conversation back to him. "So, have you gotten anything from Rebecca yet?"
"I doubt I will," he replied, "seeing as she's pursuing Mokuba."
"Mokuba? But what about you?"
Yugi laughed. "It was a crush, Téa. It was just a crush."
She was silent for a moment, lying still in the snow. "I guess crushes aren't meant to last forever," she said finally.
Yugi sat up, careful not to disturb his snow angel. "Are you okay, Téa?"
Téa got up and looked him in the eyes. She smiled. "Yes. Yes, I am."
