I happened to be listening to the radio and this song "Fall" by Clay Walker came on and an idea for a Songfic hit me! Even if you hate country music (personally I love it, then again I was born in Texas, then we moved and I still live in the South) or if you hate the story I wrote for it, you can't deny this song could fit Eric and Calleigh like a glove.
I put tons of thought into this one.
Disclaimer: I own nothing
Eric walked into the locker room and saw Calleigh as she slid off her on-duty gun, along with it's holster, and laid them on the shelf inside, Eric knew that she had another gun in the purse she was now pulling out of the locker. Based on how well she was holding herself, no one ever would have suspected she was harboring a burden. Eric, however, knew what she truly thinking, even though she built up her walls of titanium to keep out all emotion and the comfort of people. The truth was, he was scared for her, scared of losing her. Eric tried to put on the bravest face possible for her, but she was doing the same for him, herself and everybody else, not letting any fears break through.
Eric approached her, she saw him as he did. She looked up and her lips spread into a smile. The smile she always wore when the going got tough.
Only Calleigh Duquesne would attempt to smile and march on after the call she had that morning.
They had been about to head out to work when the phone started ringing. Slightly annoyed that the phone had interrupted their attempts to leave, Calleigh went back and answered.
"Hello?" she had answered. Eric stood at the door, waiting as she listened intently to the person on the other line. There was a few seconds of silence, then the atmosphere changed.
"And?" he heard her ask, her voice slightly strained. Eric looked in the kitchen and saw her. Her face was falling into a look of shock and fear as she continued to listen. He instantly became worried; he crossed over to the counter she was leaning against. Her lips were tight as she tried to cover all her emotions, but for a second Eric saw tears in her eyes.
"Okay," she nodded her voice heavy but no longer strained. She pressed the end button and put the phone back on its cradle. She took a deep breath, continuing to compose herself, before straightening up. "Ready to go?" she asked Eric, who was standing in front of her, looking worried at what had caused her those moments of sadness.
"Cal," he said, softly, putting his hands on her waist. "What's wrong?"
"How are you holding up?" he asked her now.
"Fine," she shrugged, cheerfully. "We got the killer, I got a few test shots done, and was able to help Valera a bit in DNA. All in a days work."
Eric would have thought she'd of taken a day off, but Calleigh wouldn't here of it, despite the glint of fear in her eyes.
"Someone today is going to need me to help them out," were her exact words.
She had been right, of course.
She closed her locker, his eyes following her every move. Calleigh noticed. She smiled as she put her hands on his chest.
"I'm going to be fine," Calleigh reassured him.
Eric nodded his head and took her hands in his, moving them so they hung interlocked between their two bodies.
"I know, I'm just worried, Calleigh," he said, squeezing her hands. He could feel her engagement ring on her ring finger press against his skin.
Calleigh knew Eric was worried, they both knew her will to live would only stretch out so far before something stronger would attack her body. The news of that dire phone call that morning had hit her like a speeding train, but she couldn't show fear. If she showed fear now, when she just got the news, how was she going to survive surgery and chemo?
Calleigh looked down at her and Eric's hands. For a brief moment, a horrible image came to her mind before she had a chance to put her protective barriers into affect and she saw what could become of them. She saw herself weak and dying in a hospital room. The walls white and everything cold, she could see herself with pale skin, dark circles under her eyes and her fragile hand in Eric's. Calleigh stopped herself; she refused to believe that Eric would have to see her like that. The image frightened her, what if that happened? What if she reached that stage?
She let out a shuddering breath, her walls of steel cracking.
Calleigh was able to keep her tears at bay, for now, but she had to tell someone about her feelings. She needed someone who wouldn't judge her by her tears or the fears she held captive in her heart. She needed Eric, her supporter, her rock, her love.
"I'm…" she breathed before meeting his eyes. "I'm scared, Eric."
Eric gently unwound one of his hands from hers as he reached up to stroke her golden hair. She closed her eyes as she wondered if the times he were able to do that were numbered.
"I know," he whispered.
With that, he pulled her into a tight embrace.
They may have been in a locker room, but they could care less. Calleigh gripped to Eric like a lifeline, her arms wrapped around his neck and her chin resting on his shoulder. Eric held her just as tightly; almost afraid he would lose her if he even loosened his grasp the slightest. He prayed to God to help them, he prayed like he never prayed before. He couldn't lose Calleigh, that just wasn't an option. He would do anything to keep her alive; he would sell his soul to the devil himself if it meant she would be rid of this disease once and for all.
In a few moments they totally switched positions, he was the one telling her she was going to be all right and she was the one who was scared.
"What if I don't survive this?" she asked the one question she knew there was no answer to.
"You will," Eric promised, there was no doubt in his mind she could fight this. "And I'm going to be here with you every step of the way."
Calleigh saw the image of herself in the hospital again, only this time she saw Eric. He had sure pain and sadness in his eyes as her hand went limp in his. She refused to be the reason he shed tears. Calleigh would be able to handle goodbyes and the concept of leaving this Earth more than the idea that she would make the man she loved cry. That was something she couldn't live with knowing that may happen after taking her final breath.
Calleigh pulled back, tears brimming for the first time since she got the call about her newly discovered Breast Cancer. She folded her hands in front of her.
"Eric," Calleigh choked out, her voice full of tears. "If I'm going down, I don't want you to have to go down with me," she began to pull off the engagement ring that had barely been on her finger a week, but she wouldn't let him become a widower. "I can't take this."
The ring was halfway off her finger when Eric put his hands over hers and stopped her; she didn't dare look up into the eyes that she knew would be full of comfort and love, something she never deserved from him.
"Cal," he said, trying to meet her eye but she refused. He raised one of his hands to cup her chin and gently coaxed her to look at him before moving his hand back to hers. Calleigh's eyes shined like emeralds through the pool of tears she had yet to let fall, he had never seen her so scared. "Calleigh, if you go down, I'm going to as well, whether you want me to or not…you're going to need someone, Cal, that's why I'm here."
With that, tears began to cascade down her cheeks. She bit her lip as it became harder and harder to put on a brave front, her titanium walls dissolving into sand.
"I-I can't ask you to do that," Calleigh shook her head.
Eric took her left hand and slid the ring back to where it originally sat on her finger.
"The thing is," he said, sliding his hands up her arms until they held her shoulders. "You aren't asking."
"Eric-," Calleigh started to protest.
"You are stronger than any cancer," Eric whispered to her. "I have complete faith that can and will get through this…just let me be there to help you."
Eric's eyes only backed up his words; Calleigh could feel her heart melting as he held her gaze. Suddenly, trying to hold back any emotion seemed totally pointless. If she was going to be completely honest with herself, she wanted, needed, Eric's comfort. Succumbing to that fact, Calleigh put her head against his chest and let herself fall apart. Tears bathed her face and sobs broke in her chest, they probably would have come out louder if Eric's shirt hadn't muffled them.
Eric let her cry, one hand lying against the back of her head and the other running up and down her back in a smoothing motion.
"We'll get through this…we always do," he promised her.
She couldn't find her voice to answer just yet, so she nodded into his chest.
He gently kissed her temple.
"I love you," he whispered.
Calleigh's reply was almost incoherent, but Eric heard her sob, "I love you, too."
For the first time in her life, Calleigh fell apart. At least someone had been there to catch her.
Six months later…
Calleigh had become accustomed to seeing herself in the mirror at night before she and Eric went to bed. She had become use to sliding off her wig and seeing the few patches of hair that remained on her scalp, use to how pale and skinny her face looked and just how…ill, she was. The one thing Calleigh wasn't used to was looking into the mirror and not knowing her place at Miami Dade Police Department. She couldn't go in the field, she couldn't do one thing without everybody looking at her as though she were about to die on the spot, Calleigh was also wondering if the suspects she questioned had stopped taking her seriously because of how fragile she looked. She did have one thing at MDPD, until today. Calleigh Duquesne Delko had still been the Bullet Girl, despite the diagnosis. Calleigh was still able to find some stability in her life in working with guns, her first love.
That was until today. She shot a 22 mag, a gun she had never had trouble with before, and she wasn't able to elude the kick of the gun. Her shoulder had become so weak, that the rifle nearly dislocated her shoulder and left an ugly bruise. Calleigh may have been able to cover it up and continue in firearms if Horatio and Stetler hadn't been there to witness it. That afternoon, Stetler forced her to remove herself from firearms.
Calleigh had been able to rough it through everything, the surgery, countless chemotherapy sessions, the pain, the physical and emotional scars. From losing the inside of her breast to losing her hair, Calleigh tried to be a trooper, but losing firearms was just too much terrible. Losing firearms made her realize she was losing everything to this disease, except one thing.
A shirtless Eric came into the bedroom, an ice pack in hand, and saw Calleigh sitting in front of the dressing table as she looked at herself in the mirror. Eric saw something in Calleigh's eye he hadn't seen in a long time, and that was fear. When they first found out about the cancer was the last time she showed fear. Ever since that day in the locker room, Calleigh didn't shed a tear. She focused on fighting, nothing more and nothing less. Even when the pain become almost unbearable, she didn't complain, she still marched even when she was weak or tired and, unless the doctor told her otherwise, she went to work and gave a hundred and ten percent everyday. He saw her now, though, and knew that it was becoming too much.
He walked over to her and stood behind her, gently lying the ice pack on the shoulder she had injured. She placed her hand on the ice pack and held it against her shoulder.
"Thanks," she mumbled to him, not a trace of liveliness on her pale features.
Eric knew for certain now how upset she was. Calleigh would usually be able to put up a smile when things got bad, but Eric could see now that she couldn't even find it within herself to do that. She wasn't looking at her reflection, at him, or anything particular, she was just starring at the wooden tabletop. Calleigh had known what it felt like to feel sadness, anger and pain, but never had she felt as though she were lost. Lost in the maze of her life.
Eric gently ran his hand up and down her good arm, warming her cold body with the friction.
Calleigh snapped out of her ravine of sorrow, got to her feet and faced Eric.
"I, um…I better go review a few notes, I have to be in court tomorrow," Calleigh said, her voice barely above a whisper, as she headed for the door, clearly forgetting they had been about to get some sleep. Eric knew she was trying to stop anymore emotion from escaping, but he could also see she was reaching her breaking point. He stepped in front of her, blocking her exit.
"Calleigh, get some rest, you've had a long day," he tried to reason with her. He had expected her to protest or roll her eyes and step around him. Instead she began to shake as she held in the cries that she didn't dare let escape. Eric wrapped his arm around her waist and led her to the bed. He laid down and then pulled her into his arms, careful not to inflict any pain on her shoulder.
Calleigh needed this; she needed to remove work, Stetler, firearms and everything else that wasn't here and now from her mind. Somehow, Eric had known she needed that, too.
She didn't start crying right away; she just sat there and held her ice pack to her shoulder, Eric's arms wrapped around her waist as he held her against his side. Eric looked at her as she closed her eyes and leaned into him. Eric could have cared less about how she was losing her hair, how skinny she was becoming or any of the other "imperfections" Calleigh saw in herself, he still saw her as beautiful and would never see her as anything else. He told her so whenever he thought she needed to hear it, sometimes he told her for no reason. Some days she would smile, other days she would scoff but appreciate it nonetheless and days like today…
"You're beautiful," he whispered to her before kissing the skin just above her bruise, which was exposed by the tank top she was wearing, and moving his hand to hold the ice pack against her shoulder.
Calleigh felt her heart tighten in her chest when she heard Eric's lie, at least that's what she thought it was. She shook her head, slightly, before opening her eyes. Not quite ready to become consumed by tears and his comfort, Calleigh glanced over at the picture on her bedside table, with her good arm she reached over to grab the picture frame. The frame consisted of many silver rose vines tangling together along the sides to elegantly form a subtle weaving pattern of rose blooms and the leafs along the picture inside. The picture had been taken a few weeks after Calleigh's diagnosis outside a local church, the church in which Eric and Calleigh had become husband and wife in the same day. The wedding was nothing major, just a few close friends, a preacher and themselves; it didn't bother them one bit, they liked having everything simple for once.
Looking at this photo brought back old memories to Calleigh. This was before the chemo really hit her hard and it was two weeks after her surgery, but she had totally forgotten about the cancer that day. Maybe that's why Calleigh found such solace in this picture, she had been able to live normally despite the curse that plagued her and the picture had once given her the hope of finding that again, but even that good feeling was disappearing. She still saw her and Eric smiling at each other as they stood on the front porch steps of the church, his arm around her waist and hers resting on his back. She still saw how handsome he looked in his black tuxedo as he stood beside Calleigh, who was in a long white, spaghetti-strapped gown. Calleigh sighed a bit as she saw that her hair had almost reached her elbow in this picture. She still saw that both she and Eric had the biggest, most loving, smiles on their faces. This time, however, she didn't see how she could ever find herself to be this again. In the course of one afternoon, she had lost any sense of light in this whole situation.
She touched the glass in front of the picture as light as possible with her fingertips, resting them where their bodies met in the picture before gliding them up to trace each of their smiles with a separate finger. What Calleigh wouldn't give to smile like that again with genuine happiness?
"Everything's disappearing," Calleigh croaked through the thickness of tears in her voice. She didn't know if she was talking to Eric, herself, or if she was talking to anybody at all.
Eric gently pulled her so that her head was on his shoulder. At that point, Calleigh couldn't control it. Huge, silent, tears rolled down her cheeks and onto Eric's shoulder. Eric hoped, for her sake, that she would be able to let go all the baggage she had been holding in the last few months so she could try to find some harmony in her life again. He, too, would have loved to see the smile on her angelic face as the one she had in the picture, which was now resting between their legs.
Calleigh let a few more droplets of the saltwater, that burned like acid in her eyes, fall onto Eric's skin before making herself stop. This wasn't fair on him to see her like this. Wasn't it enough to see her weak session after session, some of the times worse than others, to see her hideous, to see her scared, to see her…dying? He didn't need to see her cry too.
She took in a gust of air in attempts to stop herself from shedding anymore tears. She lifted her head off his shoulder and raised her good arm to wipe away the tears on her now crimson face.
"I'm sorry," she whispered, her voice was so rough that she wasn't sure Eric had heard her.
He had.
"Sorry?" he asked, looking down at her. He knew what she was trying to do, he had seen it for many years, she was trying to hold back tears and emotion. This was one time that she wasn't able to do it as convincingly as she'd liked, Eric could tell. She was still shaking a little and he could see that more tears were building up in her eyes. She moved her hand from the side of her face up to her now closed eyelids to lightly press her fingers against them in attempts to keep the tears inside.
Eric swore he felt a bit of his heart break at the sight of her like this. She had been through a lot already, but she still didn't think she should be crying. Eric wouldn't have been surprised if she had cried every night, seeing how sick and scared she was sometimes, but this was the only time he'd seen her break since before treatment started. The tears didn't bother him one ounce, what bothered him was her not thinking she could spill them in front of him. She was just being the same old Calleigh he had always known, trying not to show any weakness no matter the circumstance, but he had said he was going to be there for her every step and in every way. He had meant that.
"You're sorry for crying?" he asked her, gently.
Calleigh didn't answer; she just let her whole face fall into her hand, keeping her eyes scrunched up.
"Cal," he whispered, gently brushing the knuckles of his free hand up and down her forearm. "You know you can cry in front of me, you don't have to hold you feelings in for me or anybody else. No ones going to look you as weak no matter how much you cry."
Calleigh so badly wanted to let herself cry and to have Eric comfort her, but the other wanted to hold onto the dignity she had left. She heard his words, but she couldn't wrap her brain around them. He was telling her it was okay to let herself fall apart, someone was telling her that for the first time in her life. Calleigh had become so accustomed to hearing toughen up, don't cry, tears are for the weak, all through her childhood and that had never left. Now, someone was telling her the opposite of what she had been raised to believe and she didn't know how to handle it.
Calleigh shook her head at Eric's invitation to bring on the waterworks, she just didn't know what to do, she figured if she didn't know then she should just stick to her guns and continue with what she had always done.
Eric knew that if he pushed her she would just pull away, so he nodded with understanding.
"Whenever you want to," he whispered, knuckles still running in their soothing motion. "You know where to find me."
Calleigh's mind became a whirlwind, throwing everything at her in one heap. She saw the reflection of the unhealthy woman that was herself, the hospital when she went in for chemo, the happy picture of the two at their wedding. She remembered the lessons she had learned about crying at a young age and now the words of the man she loved telling her tears were okay. Suddenly, it all became too much for her tired mind to process and she felt the familiar sting of unshed tears in her eyes.
Eric took his eyes off her as he reached over to turn off the lamp on his beside table. However, before he had the chance to twist the knob, he felt Calleigh fall against him. He looked down to see that she had wrapped her bruised arm, ignoring it's discomfort as the ice pack now laid on her pillow where it had fallen, around the front of his torso and her head had fallen against the center of his chest. She was beside herself with the sobs that shook her; Eric could feel the fluttering of her wet eyelashes against his skin and the warm tears pouring onto him as she let them fall. She was finally letting go.
Eric moved his hand from the lamp, which remained the only light in the room, so that he could wrap both of his arms around her and pull her into a comforting hug. She wrapped her other arm, which trembled slightly, around his neck. He gently pulled her higher onto him; her body now cradled against his, her face was now nestled into the crook of his neck. He could feel the warm tears she shed as they ran down his neck.
Eric tried to remember that each tear that left her eye and fell onto his skin was her releasing some of her pain, bit by bit, from her heavy heart into the world. This was Calleigh allowing him to carry some of her pain, even though he couldn't so literally like he wished he could have. However, the saltwater that was now drowning his neck also told him how much pain she was in and how much she needed the weight of this burden to be shared. The realization made Eric's heart tear more; Calleigh should never of had to carry that much on her shoulders. Hell, no one should, but that didn't stop them from being forced into doing so.
Calleigh could see everything clearly as her mind screamed; she saw what she had lost, what she was losing and what was to be lost. As far as she was concerned, what she was losing and what had been lost were the same things. The things she had lost were gone for good and what she was losing would never be what they once were, not while she still had cancer, anyway. She did, however, concentrate on the two things she had yet to lose. One of them being her life. She had never really thought about the prospect of dying until all these negative feelings ganged up on her mind. Suddenly, it hit Calleigh at how much she had wanted to do with her life and what she may never get to do. Calleigh remembered wanting to see the Seven Wonders and the rest of the world, to really experience others lives and not just her own. To make amends with her father, she always had feared that something was going to happen to him because of his alcohol abuse through the years or her dying in the line of duty and they would never be able to clear the polluted air between the two of them. She wanted to have children, she never really considered the concept of having children or not until she saw that she might never have any.
Children led her to the second thing that she was still to lose other than her life, Eric. Death would certainly make her lose him and that was just the cruel reality. Even in death, she was certain, that she would miss his presence.
All of this just made her cry even harder, which made Eric hold her even tighter.
Tears still pouring down her face, she swallowed a sob so she could try and speak.
"I don't want to lose you," she mumbled into him, the thought of her losing him by leaving this world still on her mind.
Eric put his lips to her temple before inclining his head to her ear to whisper, "And you're not going to."
Calleigh heard such honesty burning in his voice that she almost believed him, but the cards were stacked against her and she was too deep in the game to stop playing.
Eric felt her lift her head so she could look at him and he her. Her face was red, her eyes slightly puffy and her face was becoming coated with water as tears continued down her face. Her arms however, stayed wrapped around him.
"Eric," she started, taking a deep breath before stating the truth. "I'm…I'm dying."
"Calleigh-," Eric breathed in sadness as he saw that she truly believed this.
"Eric, we know its true," Calleigh sobbed. "And all I can see is me running out of fight and you're going to disappear at the end of this."
By "this" Eric knew she meant her life. He gently took her face in his hands and looked into her eyes.
"You aren't going to run out of fight," Eric said with great intensity. "You won't be able to lose me."
"I'm already starting to," Calleigh sighed, she saw fear in Eric's eyes, he was afraid she was giving up. "I'm not saying I want to stop trying…I just don't know how much more strength I have left."
"You are stronger than you give yourself credit for," he whispered, trying to hide the fear in his suddenly dry throat. He didn't even want to think that she was giving up, the idea of it was unbearable.
"But what happens when I do run out, Eric?" Calleigh cried, she was reaching the point of hysteria. "No one knows what's after death for certain! I don't know for sure if I'm ever going to see you again or if-!"
Eric had pressed his lips against hers, cutting her off. Without hesitance, Calleigh kissed him back. Their lips molded together with every emotion within them, whether it was fear, love, anguish, hope, sadness or any of the emotions they had known in these last few months.
Calleigh groaned against his mouth as more tears ran down from the corner of her eyes onto the hands he still had cupped around her face. These tears were different; these were the tears Calleigh called soft rain. Calleigh had noticed that after every hurricane, once the wind and rushing water had died down, there was always one last rainfall. The rain you wished you were under a tin roof to hear or the rain you wanted to dance in, the peaceful rain that always occurred after a major turmoil. The rain that made you feel protected like the soft blanket that kept you warm as a child, soft rain.
These tears were Calleigh's soft rain, the final tears that needed to be shed because these were the once that brought peace to her heart. Eric must have also known that the worst of her pain had subsided as he gently released his lips from hers. She put her head against his chest, his arms snaking around her middle, as the silent tears continued.
"The world will end before you run out of strength," he told her, truthfully.
A part of Calleigh, she wasn't one hundred percent sure which, but a part of her believed him and with that belief came the end of the soft rain.
"You aren't going to lose me, Cal," you aren't going to lose your life, he added in his mind.
Calleigh swallowed the lump in her throat.
"Promise?" her voice broke.
"I promise."
Four more months later…
Calleigh and Eric were bustling around the house as they got ready to go to work. Eric put his coffee mug in the sink and looked out the window. The sun had rose about an hour and fifteen minutes ago, so he didn't see the golden hues turn the sky from dark to pink and blue with the possible tint of orange. But he did see the sun was still low enough in the sky to tell him the day was very young, another day of not knowing what to expect.
"Ready to go?" Calleigh asked him as she entered the kitchen, fastening the pink ribbon pin that she wore everyday on her shirt. She had on her wig, which was only a shade or two darker than the original color of her hair, and a smile.
"Yeah," he smiled back, he grabbed the keys off the counter and wrapped his arm around her shoulder as she curved hers around his waist. "Let's go," he said as they headed to the door, prepared to face another day.
Ring! Ring!
The phone made them stop as Eric swung the door open. They hadn't been expecting anyone to call this morning; the doctors had said it wold be at least three days until they would get Calleigh's results back, so it couldn't be them.
Calleigh turned to Eric; she was obviously annoyed by the interruption.
"Why don't you start the car and I'll get that?" Calleigh suggested.
"Okay," Eric nodded as he exited the house and Calleigh walked deeper into it.
Calleigh picked the phone off the cradle, pressed talk and put it to her ear.
"Delko residence," she greeted.
Eric got into the driver's side of the car and put the keys in the ignition. He twisted the keys and leaned back into his seat as he waited for Calleigh. He checked his watch; they were running five minutes late. Sighing in minor frustration, he dropped his arm and looked up at their house. When he did, his heart sunk.
He could see Calleigh through the kitchen window he had been standing at a mere few moments ago. She had her back to him, phone against her ear and her head hanging. Eric saw that the arm she wasn't using to hold the phone was bent at the elbow and that the shoulder was hunched forward. He could tell that her head was resting against that hand. That could only mean one thing in Eric's mind, she doctors had already got her results.
Sheer panic rose in his chest. He grabbed the keys and all but ran back into the house. He burst through the door and looked over to see Calleigh. Her face was in her hand, covering her eyes. Eric saw that her face was red and that it was being streaked with tears.
"Are you positive?" he barely heard Calleigh whisper as he rushed over to her, placing his hands supportively on her hips.
There was a short moment of silence before he heard Calleigh sigh, lower her hand so it cupped around her other elbow and she choked "Thank you," in a strangled voice. She pressed the button and set it on the counter behind her before her arm fell limp to her side, her eyes focused on the floor.
"Calleigh?" he asked her, softly. "Was that the hospital?"
She nodded and, before Eric knew what was happening, Calleigh flung her arms around him and buried her face in his chest cavity.
Only one deadly though entered his mind…her cancer had spread. Fear and sadness gripped every part of his soul as he held onto her. This was defiantly a turn for the worst and the fear she wasn't going to make it intensified.
She cried a few moments, Eric's arms still around her as he felt her tears soak into his shirt.
"Everything's going to be okay," he reassured her, lips brushing against the top of her head.
Calleigh nodded into his chest, excitedly, before leaning out to look at him. Eric was surprised to see that her eyes were wide with happiness and she was smiling. Not just any smile, but the wedding picture smile.
"I know," she chuckled, tears still in her eyes. She cradled his face in-between her palms and continued to smile at him. "That was my oncologist with my lab results…Eric, he said I'm in remission."
Eric felt the strongest relief he had felt in his life, as though there had been a heavy boulder on his heart that had been removed. He felt a smile break across his face and warm tears of happiness well up in his eyes.
"Oh, Calleigh," he sighed as he pulled her up into a tight embrace, if he was feeling this happy and relieved, he couldn't imagine how amazing Calleigh must have felt.
Calleigh squeezed Eric close to her with as much strength as she could muster, the ground feeling as though it had melted from beneath her and air was the only thing supporting them. More tears of joy and relief escaped and, for once, Calleigh didn't try to hold them back.
"Congratulations," he whispered with deep emotion to her. "I knew you would survive this."
Calleigh leaned out put her hands on his biceps as he continued to hold her waist.
"I wouldn't have survived this without you," she smiled, but her voice was solemn.
He had kept his promise. He had been there with her every step of the way, just like he said he would. Before she went into surgery and after she came out, Eric was there. Every single chemo session and doctors appointment, Eric was by her side. He stayed up until the early hours of the morning helping her research Breast Cancer, she sometimes passed out with a textbook in her arms while he continued to read. He had been her comforter and biggest supporter throughout this whole thing.
The only one she could fall into.
Calleigh stretched up to kiss Eric, a kiss he willingly returned.
They knew this didn't mean a promised fairy tale ending; she would still have to monitor her health very closely and reoccurrence could be a possibility.
But that was for tomorrow, today Calleigh was cancer free and had the ability to start over. She and Eric had the ability to start over. And Calleigh knew that, whenever and if ever tomorrow came, she wouldn't be alone.
She and Eric leaned out of the kiss to look at each other, huge smiles on their faces, of course. But the separation of their lips didn't mean that they weren't still holding tightly to each other and they both had the pleasant feeling they were going to stay that way for a while. As she felt Eric's warm arms around her, her mind no longer thought about losing him, but keeping him and never slipping away. Suddenly, she only saw gains in her mind, no loses. She had gained her life back and with that came the possibility of achieving the three things she was most desperate to achieve.
"What do you say," Eric mumbled as he kissed her forehead. "You and I just take the day off and celebrate?"
The old Calleigh may have found work to hold more importance, but Breast Cancer Survivor Calleigh wanted to celebrate the new title. MDPD was and always would be her second home. Today, however, was the day she just wanted to focus on her first home and reaching the three goals of her new beginning.
"Sounds great," she grinned, but then she became conscious of the phone on the counter behind her and began to loosen her arms. "But would you mind if I called someone first?"
"No, go ahead," Eric said. "Take all the time you need."
"Thanks," she nodded, turning around and picking up the phone, Eric's arms still wrapped around her.
"I'm going to call H and tell him the great news," he said, sensing that she probably wanted this phone call to be private.
"Okay," she nodded.
He kissed on the cheek before untangling his arms from around her.
"I love you," he said, Calleigh could here the smile in his voice.
"I love you, too," she replied, her smile just as wide as he began to walk away, then a sudden thought hit her. "Eric?" she asked, turning to face him, he was already a good few yards away from her. "Have you ever wanted to travel?"
He knew right away what she was getting at. Calleigh had spoken about travel before this whole ordeal, but now she seemed to want to make it into a reality.
"Yes," he answered before raising a challenging eyebrow. "Why?"
"No reason," Calleigh shrugged, being coy, before turning back to the counter.
She heard Eric's footsteps travel into the distance as she picked up the phone, getting a bit nervous. Calleigh took a deep breath and, her hands shaking slightly, dialed the old Louisiana area code.
Calleigh knew she had to do this, after this brush with death she didn't want to live through life without any regrets. She and Eric seemed to be interested in traveling, she was now going to try and rebuild some burned bridges with her father and that only left one more thing to do. Calleigh made a mental note to talk to Eric about it that night as the phone on the other end started to ring.
Calleigh knew that just because this obstacle of life was coming to a close, it didn't mean that everything from here on out was going to be easy. Life was going to have its challenges, cancer or not. But Calleigh would always have Eric to overcome them, and he would have her.
This is dedicated to three women I know: two of them battling Breast Cancer, the other one a survivor.