THE DOUBLE DEBACLE VIDEO
A/N
Bear with me, I'm not sure what I'm doing. I'm writing this fanfic originally in spanish because that's my natural language. Fortunately I can read english, so I was able to enjoy many of your amazing works. But writing in your language is a very different task. So maybe some sentences will be in a pretty poor english (Ohhhh Sheldon would hate me). So don't laugh too much at me ok? :p
If this doesn't work, just tell me and I'll delete it
I decided to do this because I have enjoyed a lot some of your fanfics, and they inspired me to do this. And I want to try to do the same for you. So here we go
Disclaimer: I don't own Big Bang Theory and its characters
"Alright, it's enough!" Sheldon squealed after sigh exasperated. This had crossed his threshold of tolerance. Despite everybody thought, he considered himself a quite flexible person and able to accommodate (reluctantly, of course) the most irritable changes affecting his schedule. Specially in the last few months.
Without going any further, past Thursday he had stoically accessed to an aberrant alteration to the long established tradition for living in his apartment. The gang had decided to modify the ingredients of their usual order of pizza. And all this without more than a little tantrum from his part (Of course, the others disagree and said Sheldon was doing a huge scandal… Ohhh they are so overreacting sometimes…). How none of his friends seemed to appreciate his incredible efforts to cope with the obnoxious disruptions to his life was out of his understanding.
And if anything could show those efforts, was how he has been willing to enter in a boyfriend/girlfriend relationship paradigm. He never pursued a relationship before or thought it was necessary for his life. When Sheldon met Amy he was a little impressed for her intelligence, logically, it was refreshing spend time with someone who could contributes a valuable vision for his work and give him and intellectual challenge (even if only on a few topics).
Besides, spend time with her served him to avoid the increasingly unsavory conversations of his other friends. These conversations always orbited on the same topic: coitus. So Sheldon was willing to increase his time alone with Amy, and that's how was born The Relationship Agreement. But ever without forget the clause that guarantees something some distasteful like intercourse would never take place.
At first Sheldon thought Amy agreed with this point, but the she had begun to give more and more to their basic carnal urges, pathetically crawling for any gesture of affection or physical contact her boyfriend was able to provide. He blamed the rest of the gang, it was a matter of time that their perverted minds infringe the weak conscience of her. Particularly, he suspected of her confusing approach with Penny. Penny, always Penny.
Not that he had never been attracted to a woman. For his chagrin, he still was a man and from time to time his libido (Yes, Sheldon has a libido) sought release. Fortunately, Kolinahr had revealed like a fairly effective method to suppress it, although sometimes, just sometimes, wasn't enough. Anyway Sheldon, like the homo novus he pretended to be, must be beyond those instincts, his goals could not be as elementary as content with the satisfaction of basic needs in Maslow's Pyramid. No, he must aspire to the top of his career, to the Nobel Prize.
Initially the vain attempts of Amy to seduce Sheldon could be considered as childish as the games a puberty boy performs to steal a kiss from the girl he likes. But eventually they had increased, worsened, becoming more and more manipulative. Using logic, Sheldon should have predicted finally things come to this point. Maybe he should have stopped it sooner.
Prohibit your partner do the activities he enjoys, irrigate his office with her feminine essence, show her private parts against the will of him, or pretend to be sick to get a little physical contact, don't contribute to building a healthy relationship. Even Sheldon knows these manipulative acts aren't brought by a sense of love (though the concept of love still baffles him) but quite simply lust.
Still, nothing had prepared him for this. After tell Alex and Raj their jobs were already fullfiled and they could go home, Sheldon was alone in his office close to finish his workday. It had been a particularly stressful one, so he still had not checked his email.
After identifying and open an email from Amy, Sheldon almost fainted at his desk. It was probably the most disgusting he could have ever seen: a film of Amy masturbating with a toothbrush called it "Gerard".
If its goal was really to get Sheldon jealous telling how this "Gerard" and not him was enjoying "the sweet and juicy fluids emanating from the loins of a beautiful young woman in the prime of her sexuality", clearly wasn't working. Unless jealousy involves almost uncontrollable need to induce vomiting. After all, Sheldon was not familiar with the feeling.
The decision was made, next time he sees Amy would notify his decision to cancel their relationship agreement. During his relationship with her, Sheldon felt he had gone from being the evil and relentless Darth Vader from the Stars Wars IV: A New Hope to the whiny and immature Anakin Skywalker from Stars Wars II: The Attack of the Clones. Oh Damn you George Lucas.
There was no point to continue fooling himself. He clearly was not attracted by Amy, but inwardly he knew that he had tried. Just that feeling was not there. Hopefully, upon learning of Sheldon's decision, Amy would end to pressure him to engage in coitus, and their relationship could be restarted at the point when they only shared their progress in their work. That was indeed what he missed.
When he was finalizing his reflection on the matter, Sheldon heard a few knocks on the door and Leonard quickly opened it slightly and poking her head.
"Hey Sheldon, we have to go home".
"Alright, I'll be ready in a minute", rushing to turn off his laptop that, amid all his confusion, had not been disconnected.
TBBT
On the way back Leonard could see clearly that something was wrong with his roommate. Sheldon had not said a single word (Not that Leonard was complaining), his eyes seemed to be focused in any particular place, and he was pressing his lips so hard Leonard could swear that at any time he would see a stream of blood coming out of them.
However, if something did not want to hear Leonard was the stupid problems of his lunatic friend. He had enough with his owns, despite Penny finally said she loved him, nothing has changed in their relationship, both were quarreling as much or more than before, without being able to find any comfortable moment, except when they were having sex. And even there they were totally comfortable, it was just the easiest way to stop fighting.
"Eyes on the road Leonard!" Sheldon shout.
"Uh… yeah, I'm sorry. You know Sheldon, now let's move to pick up our Thai food order and go to the apartment. Everyone will be there". Leonard said, hoping to distract him.
"I know Leonard", He turned his head toward his roommate and giving him a look of disbelief for his endless stupidity. "It's Monday, Monday is Thai food night, you don't need to remember it me".
Great, I'm glad that at least he's still the same bat-crap-crazy. Leonard thought sarcastically to himself. Finally seeing that it was no way to avoid the issue he asked: "There's something wrong Sheldon?"
"Yes", he said drily.
"Do you want to talk about it?"
"No"
"Fine", Leonard sighed relieved, he really didn't want hear about whatever stupid thing was disturbing Sheldon now, but he had a bad feeling that sooner or later he would listen anyway.
TBBT
When Leonard and Sheldon arrived at the 4A apartment, everyone was already there. Sheldon saw Amy and the others and instantly felt uncomfortable.
"Hi guys, food is ready", Leonard announced after closing the door and leave his key in the bowl.
Amy was sitting on the middle seat of the couch, slightly tilted toward Sheldon's spot, Penny beside hers in the other corner, Raj was in the armchair and below him the Wolowitz marriage was sitting on the carpet huddled together.
Sheldon froze for a moment, not daring to sit on his spot yet. Did they all know already about the pornographic video? He figured they did, women are unable to resist the gossip, so they have no secrets. He wouldn't be surprised if the entire thing wasn't an original idea of Amy.
Despite his inability to read facial gestures, Sheldon looked carefully at each of the three women: Amy was watching him with her usual expressionless face; the only difference was that the corners of his lips seemed to be slightly tilted upward. Penny was watching the TV, though without seeming too focused on it, her eyes reflected the same sad look she had since several days ago and Bernadette was nauseatingly rubbing her nose against Wolowitz's again.
Without a word, Sheldon walked slowly and sat on his spot, while Leonard after searching a chair for him was serving the food. The memory of the video of Amy was not doing any favors for his appetite. Also, it did not help that Amy tried continually touching his thigh with her hand.
Sheldon had resolved communicate his decision once all of them finish eating. He knew that the announcement would cause a shock in the others and he did not want to add to his existing problems having to clean the floor of chewed food waste through the dirty mouths of their friends or having to make a visit to the hospital because one of them choked. Also, he decided that he would communicate it in front of everyone, create a scene apparently was effective and because he might avoid having to tell his resolution again and again to the others separately. Everybody knows how valuable his time is.
Fortunately, out of the silent harassment of Amy, the night was uneventful and no one asked about his surly humor that matched those of Leonard and Penny. He retired slowly toward his room in the eyes of the others, and a while later he returned with a folder in his hands. He leaned it on the coffee table and everyone could see that it was the relationship agreement. Standing firm in front of Amy with his hands clasped on his back raised his head and with his usual smug finally said:
"Amy, I must inform you that I have decided to cancel our relationship agreement".
A/N
Few months ago I would believe that this so OOC for Amy, but the current Amy... come on! it's just matter of time.
I'm not particularly proud of this chapter, but it was necessary. The next will be better, I promise. See you :)