"So then," the Doctor said levelly, "we really must be off."
Everyone in the room was quiet, most staring at the Doctor, a couple exchanging queer glances with one another. The one holding Rose's arms cocked his head, chest heaving minutely in what Rose guessed was laughter for his species.
"We'd love to stick around for your Higdenshi celebrations, truly we would, but her mother is one to fret." He gestured to Rose with a cheeky grin, looking around the room as if he were trying to make eye contact with every single being. "It wouldn't due to worry her, would it?"
A woman, still crouched by the ceremonial table, pulled a small boy into her arms. The two aliens who had jumped to their feet shifted uneasily and shot looks at the child. The Doctor didn't miss them.
"That's right," he went on with a nod. "Her mum, that's it. You don't want to upset someone's mother, do you? Not on Higdenshi day."
Rose felt the grip on her wrists tighten and heard a hissing from behind her. The Doctor looked over quickly, brow low, directly into the lizardman's eyes.
"So," he said, "you should be letting her go now."
He stepped forward and put his hand out to Rose, but the alien jerked back, spitting at the Doctor. The Doctor pulled his arm away before the acid could contact his skin.
"Why ssshhould I give herrr to hyoou?" the alien breathed, stooping so his head hung near hers.
The Doctor grinned. "Look up."
The Doctor darted back and forth, throwing switches, and occasionally buttons. One in particular landed by Rose's feet.
"Do you need this?" she asked, picking it up.
"If I threw it, no." He threw another switch; this one missed Rose by several feet. The floor shook dangerously. "Rose— Grab that colourful thing in front of you, pump it five times, and bite the handle."
She pocketed the button and pumped the colourful thing five times. "Which part's the handle?"
The floor continued to shake. Rose nearly lost a hold of the oblong, knobbly thing as she tried to keep her footing.
"The green part!"
"There is no green part!"
The Doctor looked up, brows furrowed, before they lifted in remembrance. "Right. Your lot can't see that shade. To you, it looks like a sort of vomitty-blue colour—"
Rose bit the vomitty-blue part. It was tangy.
The ground stabilised. The Doctor grinned and flicked a switch, then pulled a large lever before walking to the doors and throwing them open. Rose hopped over to him and looked out, eyes widening as she took in the parade of festively dressed lizard people.
She jumped out into the street with a happy smile, and almost immediately someone from above shouted, "Carrreffffull!"
Rose flattened herself against the TARDIS just in time for a pair of stilts to walk past and join the procession, their wearer gallant in flowing sleeves and mask with hooked beak. A few young lizards in the audience cheered.
"Would hyoou like to buy a lupo cattivo, love?" An old man appeared, making Rose jump. "They make a jussst lovely giffft for the motherrrr—"
"We're set, thanks," the Doctor said, placing a firm hand on her shoulder. The old man startled and regarded him oddly, but slinked away nonetheless. The Doctor turned his grin on Rose. "Not a bad way to spend your birthday, is it?"
"It's my birthday?" she asked, surprised.
"It is on this planet."
He grabbed her hand and pulled her towards the parade.
The lizardman's eyes narrowed at the ceiling — or rather, the container rigged to overturn that was on the ceiling. "Hyoou wouldn't."
It was the Doctor's turn to cock his head. "Oh? Why not?"
"Hyoou care fffor herrr," hissed the lizardman. "Hyoou would not hurt herrr to get herrr back."
"That's where you're wrong," the Doctor said. "You see, the stuff you have in there? Nasty, deadly thing — to your species. To hers? Not so much. So if you want to live to see the sun rise in the morning, to see your mother smile at you tonight — back away. Let Rose go and back away."
"Liar!" the lizardman accused. He wrapped an arm around Rose's stomach, squeezing hard enough to make her choke; the Doctor's expression turned thunderous and he very nearly charged. "Hyoou are bluffffing!"
"Well, if you so say." The Doctor glanced at his wrist before seeming to remember he never wore a watch. He located a timepiece on the wall of the room instead and pointed it out, smiling cheekily. "Although if I'm not mistaken, that ball is scheduled to drop right about…"
"AAAAAHHHHHHH!"
"…Now."
"Mother's day!" Rose laughed. "You brought us to a planet celebratin' Mother's day!"
The Doctor looked put out. "Higdenshi," he corrected.
"Alien Mother's day," she allowed.
"It's still your birthday," the Doctor said sulkily. "I thought you'd want to celebrate."
She snorted. "Yeah, but everywhere we go, all anyone asks us is about Mum! Your mum this, your mum that— I don't wanna think about Mum!"
"No one wants to think about your mum," agreed the Doctor.
"These people do."
"Excussse me, missss?" a young voice asked. Rose looked down to see a small girl pulling at her jacket. "M-my ffffriend…"
"Aw, what is it, sweetie?" she asked, crouching down. "D'you need some help?"
The lizardgirl favoured her with large, frightened eyes. "Th-the annual offffering… My ffffriend!"
"What," the Doctor said flatly, coming to crouch next to Rose. His expression was suddenly stern, making the girl recoil. Rose put a hand on his arm. "What offering? What's happened to your friend?"
The girl fidgeted and began to explain.
Rose stumbled around the corner, wiping at her eyes. The Doctor followed on her heels, but then stopped, doubled back, and extended a hand to the mother and child.
"Come on, then!" he urged. "We've got to go now!"
The woman paused, but a second later she scooped up her son and wobbled after them, careful to avoid the residue Rose's steps left behind.
"Hyoou— Hyoou covered him in the—"
"They were going to cover you two in that," said the Doctor. "I'd think you wouldn't have too much compassion for him, knowing that."
"And hyoour ffffriend—"
"What exactly did you cover me in?" asked Rose, examining the thick, sludgy substance on her skin and clothes. It was a difficult job while running for her life, but she'd multitasked in weirder ways.
"What are your names?" the Doctor pressed on. He earned a small glare from Rose for ignoring her, and promptly ignored it.
"I am Lissshhket," said the woman, "and this is my son, Gdrisssclin."
The Doctor paused. "D'you mind if Rose calls him David? I wouldn't ask, only she's not so good at pronouncin' some things—"
"Doctor!" Rose interrupted, smile on her face. "Chocolate!"
"I'm sorry, what?"
Demonstratively, she placed a thumb in her mouth before drawing it out with a pop, leaving it free of the substance. Lishket gasped and covered Gdrisclin's eyes.
"It's chocolate!" Rose proclaimed happily. "I'm covered in chocolate!"
The Doctor smiled and reached over to give her a pat on the shoulder. "Don't eat it all at once, now."
Lishket looked about ready to faint.
The doors slammed open and in walked the Doctor.
"Where?" he demanded. "Where have they— Oh, hello."
There were five lizardfolk in the room; three nondescript males jumped to their feet, coiled and ready to strike, while an older woman crouched by a table, a small boy hanging about her feet. He shrank behind his mother as Rose sprinted into the room after the Doctor, in her haste going a few steps past him.
"Stop the offerin'!" she shouted, putting her hands on her hips. "Don't you realise this is no way to honour mums?"
"Rose," the Doctor said, holding up his arm, "let me handle this."
"You always do it, though," she said. "This time it's my turn."
"Rose," he said warningly.
Rose looked around and caught sight of what looked like a ceremonial hutch. She took a step towards it. "Is this where you do it, then? That's just…" She reached out to touch it, and one of the lizardmen snapped.
"Rose!"
The lizardman surged forward, grabbing Rose's arm before it could touch anything. He twisted it, and soon enough he was standing behind her, holding both her arms to her back.
"Let her go!" the Doctor barked.
"No," said the lizardman. "She wasss going to desecrate our ssssacred hutch!"
"She isn't going to touch it. Just let her go."
"Hyoou are a liar." The lizardman scowled at the Doctor. "If I let herrr go, she will only dessstroy our hutch — and it is ssso ssoon before our cccceremony—"
"Your ceremony?" the Doctor inquired, suddenly pleasant. The helpless looks Rose shot him seemingly did not get through. "Oh, my bad; when's that again?"
"The sixth mark of the sun," the lizardman said precisely, looking at the Doctor with suspicion. He took a wary step back and bumped into the hutch, making the container above sway. The timelord eyes darted up to it, and he smiled.
"So then," the Doctor said levelly, "we really must be off."