Title: hot chocolate on a cold day
Author: dulosis (previously HiddenGoddess :P)
Prompt: Hannah Abbott, anti-cheating quills, loyalty
Format: one-shot
Word Count: 854
Rating: pg. ish.
Genre: romance, gen, and flangst?
Characters/Pairing: Hannah, Justin. Hannah/Ernie and Hannah/Zacharias are mentioned.
Summary: sometimes they remind her of that one time she almost got expelled (maybe) for stupid reasons and stupider assumptions.
Author's notes: Thanks to glastaigsyzygy(lj) for the speedyquick beta! Written for badgerchallenge

Ernie is familiar. He's comfort and stability, an anchoring rock, hot chocolate on a cold day. Hannah admires this about him: how open he his to her, how well they fit. She knows exactly what makes him tick--how he'd give anything for an Augusta Bell chocolate frog card (even his one Aristophanes card, which, she also knows, is one of the rarest cards out there.), how he only combs his hair with his right hand, how he sets great store in what each House apparently stands for.

And Hannah loves him.

But Zacharias! Zacharias is different. Hannah's known him for years--exactly as long as she's known Ernie--and she's been friends with him almost all that time, but still, that doesn't stop her from recognising that he's amazing in so many ways, too. He, unlike Ernie, is unpredictable. He's intrigue and speculation, a loose gun, and his hot chocolate has pepper in it. Hannah knows nothing about how his moods'll affect his behaviour--and she isn't quite sure that she wants to know. His is a mysterious allure, and Hannah wants to figure him out. The only thing she can be sure of is that he's interested in her--and she's interested in exploiting that interest.

She talks to Justin about it. Justin is in her boat: he's hit it off, famously, with Anthony Goldstein, but he's been mad for Zacharias for ages. Maybe months, maybe years. Hannah chews the end of her quill as she stretches out, stomach-down, on Justin's bed and inks in the eye of the unicorn they're diagramming for Professor Grubbly-Plank. "What do you think?" she asks, and Justin just points at her quill.

Last year, Hannah had a little problem with her Charms final. She studied for days, and when the morning of arrived, she forgot everything she'd been drilling into her brain.

She decided to pass the test with less-than proper means. We're Hufflepuff, she reasoned. We're supposed to help each other out!.

So she decided to peek at Susan's paper.

In the end, she didn't cheat. She would have, in a heartbeat-- she couldn't afford to fail! Her mummy would be so disappointed!--but her all-too-aware friends had somehow read her mind (She suspected there was an illicit potion involved), and when she started to look over Su's shoulder, she found she couldn't write any of the answers down. She couldn't get anything down, at all, until she stopped considering doing anything but trying her hardest. No outside help involved.

She asked everyone about it, after. Ernie was the one who explained: "We didn't want you to get into trouble," he said. "We knew you could do it yourself," he said.

"But what if I fail?" Hannah demanded, only partially contrite. "What about the whole being there for each other thing? Shouldn't you have helped me?"

"That's not it," Megan broke in, earnestly. "See, we wouldn't be helping you--"

"Wouldn't be friendly," Wayne broke in.

"If we didn't help you fend for yourself sometimes," Susan finished, frowning. (Later, she told Hannah that she was pretty upset that Hannah would do that to her, would chance Susan's own credibility in the class).

Hannah thought she understood. Together yet separate, and all that rot. Or something. It didn't make her much happier, in any case. (It didn't stop her from keeping the quill, and using it instead of any others.)

"I passed that test," Hannah remembers. "What about it?

"You could take this one of two ways," Justin says. "Friends don't let friends cheat, or make sure your quill is your own."

Hannah frowns. She thinks she understands. But... "But I would be cheating myself," she says, "in a way. If I didn't let myself experience..."

"And that's the choice you have to make," Justin says. "Which choice is the cheating choice?" He laughs and rolls over, onto his back. "Hey, at least you're the right gender for Zacharias."

"Point," Hannah murmurs. And it really is: what if Justin is just being jealous?

But she can't think of such things. She has to carry the whole lesson with her. (But what does Justin really mean? Is only thinking about Zacharias all the time the proper thing to do, or is actually kissing him the proper thing? Should she stand apart, yet with her friends, and do as she really wants, or should she stay with the unmoving love that is Ernie's? Safety or excitement? Which will estrange her from her friends? Which will endear her to them?)

She could just become a lesbian and have fantastic sex with one of those Ravenclaw girls. Then she wouldn't have to choose between Ernie and Zacharias...

In the end, she'll probably kiss Zacharias once (maybe twice). Perhaps she'll organise a game of Truth or Dare, agree with someone beforehand to dare her to kiss him or vice versa.

Or maybe...

The next time she's with Ernie, she'll have that quill in her pocket. The next time she's studying alone with Zacharias... again with the quill.

And maybe it'll straighten things out. Maybe, just maybe, she'll find the perfect flavour.

♥!