Nothing was okay. Nothing could ever be okay,nothing could ever be the same again. How could she? How could Naomi rip her heart out and cause her so much pain? Emily was almost certain she never felt like this before. Never had she felt so empty and low, life seemed so pointless. She was the stupid one, stupid for believing their fairytale romance could pull through, for ever believing Naomi could be the one. Her mind wondered back to the recent times they spent together, smiling and laughing, when all along the lie was ticking away like a bomb, just waiting to cause an explosion.
Emily wiped her damp eyes with the back of her hand. Although the pain was written all over her face, she didn't want Naomi to see how upset she was. Being a Fitch meant you were strong and fearless, the redhead felt weak and scared. A thick silence washed into the blonde's room, the sky turning a deep shade of black as the sun disappeared.
"Were you thinking about me?" Emily asked, her eyes darting towards the tall blonde then back down to the carpet.
"What?" Naomi replied, her voice sounded so small she was sure the redhead hadn't heard her.
Emily sighed, the upset and pain now slowly began dissolving, she felt her temper rise as she gritted her teeth. "When you were fucking her, were you thinking about me?" she asked slowly as if she was talking to a deaf person.
Naomi knew this could never be brushed under the carpet, she knew if Emily cheated on her she would be reacting the same way, she wasn't sure what to do at the thought of loosing her life line. She felt her eyes sting with tears, just looking into those brown eyes shattered her heart into bits. She had done this, she fucked everything up and now she had to face the consequences.
"Emily..i..she was just.."
"Don't..just fucking..don't"
Emily squeezed her eyes shut, just the thought of her girlfriend with someone else made her skin crawl. She wanted to be the blonde's first and last, nothing was meant to come in-between them. "You and her, in this bed? You fucked her in your bed?" the redhead spat viciously suddenly leaping off the double bed she was sitting on.
"I'm sorry, Emily please!" Naomi pleaded, her lip quivered as the hot tears ran down her cheeks. "I was messed up, I didn't love her it was a stupid mistake" her words were almost choked, she couldn't loose Emily, she loved her.
"Trapped. You felt trapped but you didn't come and talk to me? Why didn't you talk to me?" Emily asked wanting her questions answered, although she wasn't sure if she wanted to hear it.
Naomi sucked in a breath to try and control her breathing, never before was she so afraid of loosing someone. "I didn't mean to hurt you Em, believe me I didn't" she shook her head as the words escaped her lips.
"All them times we were together, having a laugh and just..just being together, it was all fake" Emily muttered, her heart pounding in her ears wondering what to do, what's best for the pair of them.
No, none of it was fake" Naomi sniffed taking a step towards the shorter girl. "I've always wanted you Em, I love you" her voice wobbled, all she wanted was to feel Emily in her arms, to make her feel loved and wanted.
Emily let out a laugh, she crossed her arms across her chest. "Yeah you loved me that much that you fucked some random, you lied about the open day, you lied about everything" she growled wondering whether to just walk out the door and never turn back.
"If I could take it back, if I could undo it I would" Naomi tucked a strand of hair behind her ear. She was willing to beg on her knees to make Emily forgive her, there was no way she was going to give up just like that. "She's dead, she's not coming back, she's out of our lives" the blonde bit her lip, she could feel every piece of her heart slowly shattering, it hurt so fucking much.
"Yeah she's dead, but she is never gonna go away Naomi, this isn't gonna go away!" Emily snaps. The whole situation being so messed up because Sophia was gone, never would she be able to talk to her and get her side of things. Emily felt so out of depth, like she was drowning and Naomi was just sitting back watching.
Naomi couldn't stop the tears, she couldn't stop the sobs or the nausea feeling inside her stomach. She was loosing the best thing that ever happened to her, all for some one night stand because she felt trapped and insecure. "I can make it right" she sobbed. The blonde's eyes connected with Emily's, she hated herself for hurting her, for taking the sparkle away.
"You ruined it, you fucked it up" Emily bit her lip as fresh tears rolled down her face, she stared at the girl she thought was forever. The girl that promised she would never hurt her, she began doubting everything.
Naomi moved closer to the redhead, she had to make her see that she wanted things to work, that she loved her more then anyone. "I love you" she repeated again, she knew she'd say it a thousand million times to get Emily to give her another chance.
Emily watched as Naomi touched her wrist, her eyes closing at the contact. It somehow seemed so long ago that the two had touched, she felt delicate kisses being smothered on her cheek along with whispers of apologizes.
"I love you, im sorry, im so sorry" Naomi whimpered wrapping her arms around Emily's back, she needed her, she wanted to show her that she only loved her.
Emily's mind began tail spinning out of control, her brain flashing images of Naomi fucking Sophia, the two kissing and cuddling. Nothing could get rid of the bile building in her throat, the thought of Naomi touching somebody else made her feel sick.
"Don't" Emily moved her head away from the blonde, she had to be forceful, there was no way she wanted to be intimate with the blonde, all she could think about were Naomi's hands all over somebody else. Somebody that wasn't her.
"I don't want anyone else Ems, ive always wanted you" Naomi held the shorter girl as close as she possibly could not wanting to let her go. She wanted to feel her, she had to hold her.
"Just..fucking..get off me!" Emily blurted out along with a gut wrenching sob.
Naomi felt her heart drop to the ground. "Please..Please Emily" she begged wanting to make everything better.
Emily struggled to free herself from Naomi's arms, she felt too tired and weak. "Don't fucking touch me!" she screamed beating her fists against the blonde's shoulders. The redhead felt a surge of energy strike her.
Naomi simply stood taking each hit, she deserved it. She deserved more then a few fucking measly punches to the shoulder, she winced in pain as Emily sobbed and finally collapsed into her arms. Naomi threw her arms around her holding her close,she listened as Emily cried into her chest, she was responsible for this, for all of this.
"I'm gonna make everything better, I promise" Naomi whispered pressing a tender kiss ontop of Emily's head.
The redheads sobs quietened as the minutes passed, silence filled the room, two shattered hearts still beating as the hands on the clock ticked away. Naomi slowly slid down the wall sitting on the floor with Emily still in her arms, her tear stained face lighting up as the moon shone through the window.
As Emily slept in her arms, Naomi had time to reflect. She knew she could never find anything close to her, she didn't want to feel love with anyone else. A stupid mistake had ripped Emily's fragile heart out, she wanted to make it complete again, she couldn't give up and watch the relationship fade away. There was hope, there had to be hope.
So this is my version of series 4 carrying on from episode 2. Please please review and i will hopefully post the next part soon. Thanks :)