Disclaimer: All characters belong to J.k. Rowling. She is the amazing mastermind behind the Harry Potter stories.
Million thanx to xMrsJamesPotterx, she was so kind to béta-read this story.
Warning: Slash!
Sadness, anger or in love?
He looked up, to the ceiling. It sucked. The ceiling was forming, at least in his head it was. He didn't know anymore. He was so sure that he made the right decision. That he knew what he was doing. Oh, yeah of course. He was really popular by this decision. He had had girls enough times. But, was that what he really wanted? If someone asked him then his answer would always be the same. Yes, he wanted that. But actually he didn't want that. He hated it to be like that, he hated it to use every girl, to break them. He didn't want it anymore. He failed.
He stood up, very quick so that the others wouldn't wake up. He walked in the dark. He walked quickly on his toes to the bathroom. He started to cry at the moment that he closed the door behind him. He sat against the wall. His knees up, his hands against his head and his elbows on his knees. His shoulders rocked back and forth . That was him then, a seventeen year old boy, sad, angry, and full of remorse. Angry, because of his stupidity. Anger, because of the things he had done. Sad, because of the deep, painful anger he felt. Sad, because all the broken hearts he had made. His 'creations'. Sad, because he could never ever get what he desired more than anything else in the whole world. The door went open, a sleepy person walked the bathroom in
"Padfoot? What's wrong?" The sleepy person asked.
"Nothing, Moony. Just couldn't sleep. That's all, go to bed." Sirius answered. Remus closed the door behind him and turned on the light. He sat himself down next to Sirius.
"What's really wrong?" He asked soft.
"It just that," Sirius stared, but he stopped after those words. "Never mind" Sirius noticed something; he noticed that Remus was looking at his face, straight in his eyes. Would Remus notice that his eyes were red of the crying? Would he think now that he had that more often? Would he think that he had this every night? Sirius was shocked when he saw Remus confused face.
"Remus?" Sirius whispered after a while. Remus nodded, even the fact that Sirius couldn't see Remus, he knew Remus was listening. "Could you keep this a secret? I prefer no one else knows." It stayed quiet for a few second, and then Remus smiled. He hugged Sirius, while he whispered in Sirius ears:
"Of course Sirius, of course. Because you want it" Sirius smiled, tears walked down a path on his face. He wanted to stay like this forever, just like this. In the arms of his love. But, he knew he couldn't. Remus had had a girlfriend since their fourth year. That girl got all his love. Sirius knew that was what he wanted, but he couldn't get. But, he would keep loving Remus and that was the best he could do.
Me: And today a special guest in mine room.
James: What! Are you crazy or something? Sirius loves Remus, no way!
Me: James, sweetie (Yeay, sweetie, something wrong with that:P) It's a story and btw, what wrong with such feelings?
James: He loves girls! But, whatever, if you are so crazy you like this relationship. Go on with it.
Me: Well, thanx. Not like I needed your permission. But I'm happy I got it.
James: Hé, if you write about me or my friends you need our permission.
Me: Sweetie, it's my story. I can write about who ever I want. Understand?
James: Well, if you say it like that... I don't like it. Hello, Remus and Sirius. No way that that ever happend.
Me: Well, it didn't happen here. Did it?
James: Damn, you're right. I like to hear what the readers think of it. Please tell me.
Me: Right... Well, I guess you will know in a few days...
XXX