It's life I guess.
So, I live it even though somethings I wonder why.
Not that I'm one of them teens that want to kill themselves or something, cause, trust me, I'm not.
It's just, I wonder somethings. What's, like, the purpose of living and shit cause I sure as hell don't know and I really do at times.
Like my mom, I asked her once as she said something about founding the right person to spend the rest of your life with.
I doubt it.
She's not spending the rest of her life with anyone but me I guess, not that I mind or anything. I love my mother to death, like, she's the freaking world to me and I'll die for her if I had to.
She's my everything, lets leave it at that.
So, before I go on to ranting on about my life and how I'm looking for the meaning of it and how I found out the meaning of it and blah, I will introduce myself.
Luce is what everyone calls me, except mom, since she calls me by my first name which I won't tell.
Not a big fan of it, to bad.
I'm apart of the Fairy Tail Guild, insert smiley face since I am a proud member, I have lots of aunts and uncles, and I have a white cat named Honey.
She's a girl, just saying.
That's all you need to know, so yea, deal with it.
I know I'm beyond interesting but I don't really know you.
Oh, damn, I should probably tell you about my mommy though, she's very important.
Her name is Lucy, she's beyond pretty since everyone says so, she's a blond, she's a key mage or something, I'm not sure since I'm a Fire Dragon Slayer -yea!- and keys aren't my forte, and she's amazing.
Did I tell you I love my mom, cause I do.
I remember someone saying I shouldn't be so attached since one day she's going to leave, I punched him so hard my hand was swollen for weeks.
He deserved it.
My mom would never leave me, she even told me herself.
Anyways, before I through a fit, that's pretty much me.
So, I'll begin with my life story and the meaning of it and what not.
It kind of started when I asked my mom who was my dad.
She smiled, but I could tell it was fake, I always could.
She said he was somewhere, being an S-class mage saving villages and searching.
Searching for what?
She would then brush my blond bangs to the side and say he loves her very much and wishes he was here with them.
Bull shit.
If he wanted to, he would have been here from the start.
He pretty much abounded us and I despise him, but I wouldn't say it to her.
She was sensitive to the subject.
So I left it at that.
But, you know how karma's a bitch and I guess it was finally getting back at me for beating up a whole school group of whiny rich snobs that had something to say about my skirt being to short and my cat talking,- like what cat didn't talk?- I was just hit by something and not just literally.
I ran into the Guild's Library in the back and found it.
The book was huge and all, but whatever.
And there, seating at the stools by the bar where I always sit with my mom, was her and a pink haired man.
I scratched his face off with my nail.
He had his arm around her and they where smiling so big I thought it was a little corny out-of-a-movie thing.
But what ever.
I flipped a couple more pages and found out his name was Natsu, whom, if I remember right, was the name of my father.
I finally found it out after years of not knowing what he looked like, which made me feel a little dumb since it was just a few steps away.
"Luce, what are you doing?" the blue hair boy says, a new tattoo on his shoulder she sees, "Are you breaking rules? You know our mom's don't like us back here idiot."
"Suck one," I groaned, before putting the book away. "Pain in my ass, I swear."
He shakes his head before grabbing my arm and walking me out.
He's only a year older and a half older then me and he acts like he's the boss of everyone, especially me.
Yea, whatever.
Anyways, aside from the pain in my ass Jerde, I found out my father's name is Natsu and for some reason, I don't like him even more then I did before.
No, more like I hate him.
He's a dead beat if you ask me that left my mom to do kami's know what.
Why would my mom settle for less if she deserves the world and more for being just her.
And then the whole purpose of life hits me and I get mad.
And I don't know why.
Was it cause of Natsu, my mother deserving more in life, or the fact that I don't know why I'm living in the first place, or all three?
I don't know.
My mood is at an all time low now.
But then, like sent to me by a guardian angel or something, a man comes and visits us.
I seen him before when I was little, but never really talked to him.
His name is Loke, and he has brown hair that reminds me of a lion.
"She's gorgeous," he says out loud, smiling at me. I blush a little cause it caught me off guard, and he gives me a hug.
I look over at my mom and she's smiling so wide I thought I would cry or something cause I rarely see a smile on her that's so, so real.
I look at Loke and he's just as happy, hugging my mom and telling her that he misses her so much.
He loves her.
I can tell, I'm good at that.
And not just love like I love her, but love like he loves her and wants her as his and his alone.
But my mom doesn't, the way she looks at him doesn't show it.
And my heart aches a bit cause she deserves a man like that.
She deserves everything.
And just like that, he leaves.
He comes once in a while, but only for a while.
And so, I make it my life's purpose to make her the happiest.
"That's so nice, Lulu-chan!" my best friend, Levaliy, squeaks, her blue curly hair bouncing.
"I guess it is, but you got to also think about your self to. I know Aunt Lucy wouldn't be to please with this," Jerde, the pain in the ass, says with his arms crossed. "She wants you to be happy too."
"I am." I say back, picking at my nails with my feet on the table.
"Yea!" squeaks Honey, sitting on her owners lap.
"I agree with Jerde, you got to think about yourself too," says one of the twins, his shirt now off while his brother works on his own pants.
"Yea, what they say." says the blonde alcoholic, her head now on the table.
So, that night before I go to bed I walk into my mom's room and tell her about it.
She keeps a soft smile and holds my hands, telling me she loves how I think about other before myself, just like my father.
It hurts when she says that, but I don't say anything.
But then she also says she is beyond happy, she's happy with her life and the Guild and me.
"Especially you," she smiles, hugging me tightly. "You're the reason I was brought into this world and I couldn't have asked for more."
She tells me she loves me so much that the world couldn't compare and then I'm off to bed.
And I'm happy for once I should add.
And maybe yea, I'll try and find my own life's purpose and the reason I'm here living in this world.
But, of course, Life just loves hurting me in ever way possible.
But this time, it was a KO that I couldn't shake off.
I had just came back from a mission with the twins and little miss alcoholic Lana when Jerde pulled me to the side.
"Your mom as at the hospital," he says quietly, and my eyes shot up at him, "She's really sick."
And I run off with Jerde behind me, telling me to calm down.
How could I?
My mom was never sick, b-but when she was she would just need to stay home with a book she was writing and my special soup.
I felt so useless..
When we got there, my mom's in bed smiling, and I start crying cause I was so scared.
She tells me she's alright, but then she starts crying too.
Jerde steps out.
"I'm sick, Lucia."
"B-but you're here now, you'll get better soon right?"
"No, baby, I'm sick." she holds my face delicately with her soft hands, "I've been sick for a while now."
And I'm frozen, she tells me how she's been going on just because I was there to give her strength and will to do so.
Then she tells me how she loves me and she was so blessed to have had me as her daughter.
Then she tells me how she will now be with Natsu, watching over me like he had been doing since he left this world years ago.
Her heart hurts so badly.
"He loved you so much, nothing could change that."
We stay like this for another two hours before I'm asked to leave while my mom rests for the night.
Once I walk out, I see Jerde leaning against the wall with his arms crossed.
"I'm here for you," he says and I run into his arms and cry.
"She's going to leave me here alone..."
I can't handle this, my mom not living anymore, I just can't.
And then now knowing my father's been died too, that was just it.
I've been mad at a mad that's died, how dumb did that sound?
I cried the whole way home.
"She wouldn't want to see you like this," the twins say in unison, one on each side of me.
"We'll be here for you," Lana says, holding a teary eyed Honey in her arms. "Through all of this."
"Ayee.."
I visit my mom hourly after that, I don't take any missions, and my best friend and aunt Levy are MIA.
"Don't be sad, baby girl." my mom whispers, hugging me tightly while we walked into the house with Aunt Erza and Uncle Gray.
"Luce, can we speak to your mother alone for a minute?" Aunt Erza says, eyes soft.
I walk out and punch a wall and burn things down.
Why was life such a bitch to me?
What had I done to deserve something like this?
What did my mother do to be taken away so soon from my life?
She was so kind and loving, everyone loved her, so why her?
Why not me?
I had no purpose in life, I didn't even want to live anymore if they were going to take my mom from me.
I can't.
Jerde finds me later with Honey, and I cry again.
I didn't know what to do anymore.
And then the day comes.
Everyone's there, and she tells me she loves me so much and will be watching over me with my father before she leaves silently.
Everyone's crying but me, since I can't do so anymore.
My heart aches so much that I thought I'll probably die because of the pain.
But I don't.
There's a funeral a few days later, and I'm at the front with Aunt Erza and Uncle Gray and Jerde that hasn't left my side.
And after that, I don't speak much.
I felt like life isn't all it's cracked up to be and I'm pretty much just waiting to die too.
"I miss mommy too." Honey sniffs, curled up in my arms while I walk up to the Guild for the first time in weeks.
"Me too." I whisper, pushing the doors open.
Everyone is there, quietly.
Loke, my mom's friend, walks up to me and tells me to follow him to the library.
And just like life can be a bitch, it can also be your savoir.
And just like a savoir saves a person, the seven people in the Library were mines.
Levaliy, whom I hadn't seen in weeks, was standing in the middle with a book in hand. She looked tired but was still smiling.
Her mom and my aunt, Levy, stood next to her with a pair of pink reading glasses.
The twins and Lana walked up to her, Lana taking Honey and the twins walking her up to them.
"Your mom wanted you to have this." aunt Levy smiled, placing the glasses on her. "She's been working on it for a while, and me and Levaliy finished it for her."
"Open it," Levaliy smiled before handing the book to me. I held it, almost afraid to open it.
"Her magic's in there," Loke smiled, patting my shoulder.
I looked at him, and he took a deep breath, "And your fathers, they wanted you to have it."
I wants to frown when he mentions my father, but I don't.
I opens the book and everything goes white.
I'm alone.
Then, off to the distance I can see a group of people around this man.
And then I see my mom.
She looks young, and I want to run over there and just hug her but I feel someone grab my shoulder.
It's Loke.
"She's beautiful, isn't she?"
I shake my head yes before looking back, a pink haired boy -my father- jumping over the screaming girls and looking pretty damn disappointed once he makes it to the other man.
He walks off with a blue cat, and my mom goes after him and thanks him.
"That's how your parents met."
It begins to change, and it looks like the Guild now, except it looks a little different.
"Luceee!" my father yells, pushing everyone out the way and hugging my mom, "I'm back!"
She giggles and slaps him on the shoulder, telling him to let go.
It changes.
My mom is crying and she's surrounded.
My father comes in from out of nowhere and is burning everything in sight before picking up mom and carrying her away.
"Anit no one hurting Lucy!"
I can hear a silent thank you before it changes again.
They're at our old apartment me and mom use to live in when I was little.
"Don't do this.." she says, her arms wrapped around him.
He's holding her around the waist before he kisses her.
"I can't stop myself."
Another change.
"This is my girl!" he screams, and the Guild goes into battle after.
"Well finally!" a younger Aunt Cana cheers, passing a drink over to mom.
My mom's pouting while my dad runs around burning things.
Change.
"You think she can hear me in there?" my dad pokes at my mom's big belly.
"Yea," she smiles, hands over top of her stomach. "She moves a lot when you talk to her too."
He smiles and starts talking at her stomach,
"This is your dad, and I'm all fired up to see you!"
A change.
Mom is pushing a stroller around, a baby-me- in it giggling while my dad makes funny faces.
"Lucia, guess what?" he says to the baby, grinning.
The baby giggles loudly and he picks her up, "You're gonna be the bestest Dragon Slayer ever!"
The baby is laughing while he raises her up in the air.
Change.
"Come here, Lucia." my father says, arms out while my mom held the baby up on her feet.
The baby giggled loudly before walking slowly to her father.
"She's doing it!"
A change.
"I love you," my mom whispers, her hand in his while a baby slept on top of him.
"Me moreee," he grins, and she smiles too.
And then it goes white again.
"Your mother and father did this for you before you were born." Loke begins, hand on my shoulder. "The day your father died, your mom lost her other half."
I teared up.
"You kept her going, and you made her happy again."
My tears began to run down my cheeks.
"There was no man more crazy about his daughter then you father, he wouldn't let you go at time and you were just the same with him."
I covered my face.
"They loved you a lot, and there's so much more in this book for you to see. You'll be able to see them whenever you want too now."
I drag my hands down my face, before smiling just a bit.
And just like that, they're back in the library again.
I thanked everyone and after a while, walked home with Jerde.
I'll find my purpose of living one day, since my mom and dad found theirs in each other.
A/N: I failed with the one-shot-per-day thing :( But I'll make it up somehow! :D
This story is, in a way, recycled from another of my stories from another fandom but I just wanted to use it since my friend told me about her problems and how it makes her question life and it really got me thinking about life and stuff.
Review's are Love !
