A/N: Hey everyone! Here's a little post 5x16 one-shot for you since they almost gave us an emotional scene with the Charmings but decided to end it before it could happen. Sorry it took so long to get out. I wanted to take my time on it and make it decent. Update- i will be finishing my other story soon, not sure how soon, but most likely before the month of May is over. Fun fact- I'm already working on another MC story that I'm really excited about. Anyways, I hope you enjoy this one-shot! And may your sanity be with you during these final episodes of season 5! Thank you guys!
Another sleepless night plagued Emma in the underworld, or as Regina affectionately named it, "Underbrooke". It was easy as the Dark One to skip out on sleep because she didn't need to, but now her body craved it. Unfortunately, no matter how much she wished to sleep, it never came. Countless thoughts raced through her mind.
Tonight her head was filled with all the 'what-ifs' tagged along with her mother's statement earlier. "For all those years, if you had just heard our voices would that have made a difference knowing someone out there loved you?"
Of course it would have, Emma thought. She held out hope for so many years that her parents were out there somewhere and that they loved her. She couldn't even count how many different scenarios had played through her mind. At age 28 she was still thinking of excuses to explain her parent's absence. She could remember wanting to believe Henry's crazy theory at first merely because she couldn't wrap her mind around the fact that she was left on the side of the road with nothing but a blanket and a name.
Her life would have been so different if she had grown up knowing their love. Hell, her life would have been so different had she grown up the way she was supposed to, as a royal. She saw how her parents were with her little brother, how they loved him unconditionally from the start and how they remind him all the time how much they do. But Emma in no way felt jealous of her baby brother. She got over that the minute she laid eyes on him. But she couldn't help how she felt as she watched her parents raise Neal the way she wanted to be raised: loved.
She found herself, at times, longing for a life that was never hers. The late night lullaby's and stories, her parents comforting her bad dreams, playing make believe and indulging in her childhood fantasies. Sadly, that was a life that was never hers. Instead she grew up bouncing from home to home and being used as a meal ticket for her foster parents. She couldn't say that for all the homes though. Emma sometimes wished Ingrid didn't go crazy, Minnesota would've been a nice place to live.
Emma let out a huff of frustration. There was absolutely nothing they could do about it now so why bother worrying about it. Her mother's words still wouldn't leave her head. She would've loved to hear their voices. Her younger self would've loved that sense of hope. She was unsure of how her adolescent self would've dealt with it, but yet again it didn't matter. That never happened.
Rolling over for the thousandth time that night, Emma decided she needed to stretch her legs out a bit. Being curled up on that small couch was taking a toll on her body. Mindful of Killian, Emma made the short trek to the kitchen. She'd love to take a walk down to the docks to help clear her head, but she was pretty sure her parents would kill her if she went wandering off alone in the underworld.
Bracing herself on the counter she began stretching out her calf muscles. Her stomach was growling and she highly doubted her mother went grocery shopping in Hell, but she soon found herself searching through the empty cabinets anyway. Confirming her suspicions, she found no food in the cabinets and a quick check of the fridge made her want to cry.
Sliding her back against the fridge, she sat on the floor with her head in her hands. She had conjured plenty of things before with her magic, but nothing as precious as food. What if it had some magical after taste? Or if it wasn't edible? Regina never covered nutrition in any of her magic lessons and Emma was disappointed in herself that she never bothered to ask.
Getting ready to call it quits, Emma remembered her mother's emergency stash of granola bars in her backpack. She stood up and glanced around the bottom floor of the apartment searching for that sacred backpack. Her eyes finally landed upon it and of course it was right next to her parent's bed. She considered forgetting about the granola bar, but the ache in her stomach drew her to her parent's room.
Before she realized it she was at the foot of the bed. She laughed at the nerves bubbling in her stomach because the thought of her parent's catching her sneaking around at her age humors her. Being extra cautious Emma tiptoed by her mother's sleeping form and bent down in front of the backpack. She slowly opened the front flap reaching her hand in and dug around for what she had been in search of.
The familiar crinkle of the packaging told her she finally got something to hold her stomach over until they once again go to the blind witch's diner. As Emma got up and turned to leave she felt something grab her wrist. Her body jumped and the light in her parent's room flickered.
"Emma?" a groggy Snow asked.
Feeling guilty for waking up her mother, Emma cringed. "I'm sorry. I didn't mean to wake you up."
"Are you alright?" Her mother became more coherent and Emma noticed the flash of panic across her mother's face. She'd panic too if her kid had accidentally woken her up.
"Yeah, I'm fine. Just grabbed a granola bar, I was a little hungry." Emma explained, unable to meet her mother's worried eyes.
"I meant to leave you a few snacks in the cabinets, but I never got around to it today. I'm sorry, Emma. Do you need anything else? Some water?" Here she goes, Emma thought as she rolled her eyes. Emma called this her overbearing mother mode.
"No this is fine, thanks. Goodnight." Emma turned to leave and for the second time her mother grabbed her wrist.
"What's wrong?" Blunt and to the point. Maybe Emma was rubbing off on her parents. Or maybe this was another trait she got from them. She'd never truly know.
"Nothing, I was just hungry." Emma explained as she pulled her wrist from her mother's grasp.
"No, it's more than that." Snow eyed her suspiciously.
"It's nothing." Emma sighs. She was stubborn and didn't want to talk about it.
"Emma, honey, you need to sleep. I know it used to be hard for you, but it's starting to take a toll on you now." Snow affectionately rubbed her thumb over the back of Emma's hand. Not thinking about her actions, Emma ripped her hand away from her mother's.
"I'm fine!" Emma said with more force than she intended. She saw the slight hurt cross her mother's face while her father rolled over, no longer asleep.
"Snow, what's wrong?" He rubs his eyes and they focused on his wife. Confusion was clear in his features until his eyes landed on his daughter, then panic took over. "Emma? What's wrong? Are you okay?"
"As I was saying, I'm just fine. Just came in here to get a damn granola bar." Emma watched as her parents had one of their signature silent conversations. Her father's eyes grew soft as he turned back to her.
"Still can't sleep?" David asked.
"UGHHH. It's not about the no sleep thing. So can we please move on?" Emma snapped.
"Emma, talk to us." Her mother invited her to sit on the bed. Deciding not to go against them, Emma sat down on the bed.
"What's bothering you?" Her father gently prompted. Emma took a few moments before answering.
"I don't know if it would have made a difference." Emma started. She slowly looked up and saw the confused look on her parents faces. "Hearing your voices all those years. As a kid I would've loved it, I know that. But waiting 28 years and only hearing ghostly whispers? I know me and I would've lost hope like I did in reality." She finished.
Her parents seemed to mull over her answer before her mother replied, "So why do you seem so upset?"
"I absolutely hate the 'what-ifs' of our situation. I hate what I missed out on, you guys would've been everything I dreamed of growing up and I hate thinking about it. I can't stand it because it makes me angry and bitter and I don't want to live like that. We can't change what happened, ever. As much as I would've loved growing up with you guys, it was never meant to happen." Emma dropped her eyes and took a deep breath.
"Emma," her father said. "Emma, look at us please." He waited for his daughter to make eye contact before he continued. "We love you more than anything. We hope you know that. It killed us to make that decision. Not a day goes by that I don't think of the 'what-ifs' too. But I would make that decision time and time again to save your life. Please never forget how much we care about you."
"I know you do and I appreciate it. You guys have done nothing but show me how much you care ever since the curse broke. You've followed me to countless lands to help me out, but you shouldn't have followed me here." Emma said.
"Emma, we weren't letting you do this alone." Her mother countered.
"Mom, our names are on grave stones and now we're trapped down here. My brother is up in Storybrooke without you guys. You already missed out on my childhood, don't miss out on his." Hurt flashed across her parents faces. Emma knew that was a low blow the second it came out of her mouth, but it was true. She had felt incredibly guilty ever since Hades started targeting them.
"We aren't discussing this. We made our decision, that's it." David said forcefully.
"Although we miss him dearly, your brother will be just fine for a couple more days without us because we will be leaving here very soon, you can count on that." Snow added for good measure.
"I'm sorry," Emma whispered.
"Like your father said, we love you. No need to be sorry, okay?" Snow grabbed her daughter's hand once again and gave it a loving squeeze.
"Okay." Emma gave a small smile to her parents.
"Think you can try and sleep a little bit tonight?" Her father asked.
"I'll try. Thank you guys. I love you." Emma said and she got up.
"We love you too, Emma." Snow said.
"Always." David added.
Emma made her way back over to the couch, where she finally opened the granola bar she had been dying for earlier. Who knew wanting food could turn into such an emotional conversation? After satisfying some of her hunger, she laid down once again hoping to sleep. Her mind continued to wander from one thing to another until finally landing on one topic. Getting out of the underworld once and for all.