A/N: Not that funny, but good enough, I suppose.
20 Ways To Annoy/ Cause Great Pain To Cluny The Scourge.
1. Sneak into his camp and steal his eyepiece.
2. Somehow capture Cluny and introduce him to Basil Stag Hare.
3. Tell Cluny that he is a horrible leader and that even Ragear would be better at the job.
4. Chop off his tail.
5. When talking, interrupt him and tell him, "Aw, go fall out 'o a tree."
6. Interrupt Cluny and yell loudly, "Huh? Huh? What did you say?" every time you hear him talking.
7. Inform him that his horde is about to rebel against him and go to Redwall's side.
8. Politely tell him that he is insane.
9. Yell to the entire horde that Cluny has nightmares about butterflies and daisies.
10. Introduce him to a hungry Asmodeous.
11. Casually tell him that the tapestry is going to be taken from him soon (before Basil and Jess do it) and laugh at him when he ignores you and it is taken.
12. Wag your paw/finger at him and tell him that he should stop playing 'Capture Redwall' and go to bed.
13. Tell him that he is spawn of toads, frogs, and eels mixed together.
14. Chop off his tail and force-feed it to him.
15. Chase him, tie him up, and sprinkle flowers over his head.
16. Yell in horror that there is an angry looking mouse in armor, growing bigger and bigger all the while, heading towards his tent.
17. Introduce him to the Warrior Cats, and politely tell him that they want to eat him.
18. Give him a small dose of Rat Poison.
19. Remind him about the unsuccessful siege on Redwall, and how his horde was hurt badly by the hornets and the vegetable oil. And then tell him that a little squirrelbabe had done that.
20. Lastly, show him this list.