Ok, so this is my first attempt at writing a fanfic in a long time. This chapter will be really shor I hope you enjoy it, and would appreciate any feedback that you could give. Thanks!

I do not own Twilight or any of its characters….that's all Stephanie Meyer.

Tick…..tick…..tick…..

The rhythmic cadence of the kitchen timer had become a familiar and depressing noise for me during the last 18 months. Hell, it was practically my own personal theme song. Every month, the same painful routine. Pee on a stick, spend the next three minutes desperately hoping and praying for a positive result, then become even more heartbroken when the result is yet again, negative.

Tick…..tick…..tick…..

I sat on the edge of the bathtub, head resting on my hands, trying to calm myself. I knew this month wouldn't be any different. I knew that I wasn't going to be pregnant. Yet I still hoped with all my heart. Jacob and I had been trying for a baby since we got married 18 months ago. We had decided that we wanted children immediately, while we were still young. It just made more sense that way, but I guess fate had a different plan.

Tick…..tick…..DING!

I took the stick from the countertop and let out a sad sigh as my suspicions were confirmed. Negative. After throwing the stick into the trash, I set to washing my hands, scrubbing vigorously as if it could help wash the sadness down the drain. Looking into the mirror I could see that my eyes were glassy and red, brimming with tears that threatened to fall. I turned the faucet off, dried my hands, and faced myself in the mirror. I could not leave this bathroom looking upset. Jacob was sitting right outside, and it didn't take me long after our first few attempts at conceiving to figure out that he did not like for me to get upset when we didn't succeed. He hated to see me sad and hurting. I think it has something to do with the summer before my senior year of high school. The summer that Edward left me and never returned.

I wiped my hands on my skirt, straightened my back and forced my face to remain neutral, then turned the knob and went to face Jacob. I had to be strong.

"So?" he questioned. "Any good news?"

I shook my head and stared down at the ground. The carpet suddenly became very interesting.

"Oh well, there's always next month…" That seemed to be his mantra lately. Always next month, always another try. He stood to give me a hug and a chaste kiss on the cheek. "I'm gonna go watch the game, baby. The Mariners have been doing pretty well lately, might make it all the way. I'll be to bed later. Love you."

I whispered a quick "love you too" as I watched him turn and leave the bedroom. It puzzled me that he never got upset about the results. He was always so stoic about it. Maybe guys were different from girls in that way. For me, every time I saw the negative on the stick it put another crack in my already fragile heart. I felt an overwhelming sense of loss and failure. Then came the nagging "what if" thoughts, followed shortly by a burst of shame. Perhaps this whole thing was my fault….was I doing something wrong? Was I messed up? Was this some kind of punishment for all the things that happened in the past?

I knew these thoughts would take me nowhere but in circles, so I shut off the lights and crawled into bed. Sleep was swift in coming and soon I was drifting into dreams. Dreams of a beautiful clearing in the woods. Dreams of unruly bronze hair and luminous golden eyes…