I know I know I'm evil, I should be writing another chapter for the other pieces I'm currently writing but this was stuck in my head and I wanted to get it out and before all these types of stories started to flood fan - fiction. Ok so firstly I have conjured this up from snippets of information from bloggers and other fan sites. So you have been warned. I hope you like it I'm actually a tad nervous about this one... I hope you continue to read and enjoy!

I don't own Castle.

The weather expressed what kind of day it truly was for the loved ones of Roy Montgomery. A dull grey covered the sky of New York; no one would even think that summer was on its way.

Words were spoken, but Katherine Beckett didn't hear a single sound. It didn't matter to her anyway she already knew what kind of man Captain Roy Montgomery was. He was everything a good captain should be, fearless, strong, and compassionate, a hard arse when he needed to act as such.

He was like a father to her.

He was her mentor, her boss, her captain...

And now he was just gone.

Just like Royce...

Just like her mother...

It wasn't fair, it never is. She hated seeing Roy's family so lost, she knows the feeling all too well.

After speeches were said Kate made her way outside she couldn't stand being surrounded by so many people.

Her emotions from the past few days were catching up with her and she would rather not let anybody see her break down in tears. She was so angry at herself and at Roy why couldn't he have just left her to try and solve her mother's case. She was angry that he died trying to help her, it should have been me. She screamed in her mind. It's my fault.

She was taking long inhales of breath in to keep herself being reduced to tears, why couldn't she just solve this case? What had she done to deserve this torture of getting so close then having it get ripped out from under her?

All she wants is justice; she could find justice for almost every other case but never the one she truly wanted. She was still struggling with Mike's death and now having her Captain die was just a kick while she was down.

"Hey" Castle's soft voice brought her back from her thoughts. She looked up and gave him a small smile there was no point to this, both knew it was forced.

"Hey, Castle." Her voice came out in croaky whisper, if her eyes didn't give away that she had been crying her voice certainly would have.

Castle placed his hand on Beckett's knee, he didn't know what else to do or say for that matter. Her hand moved over to sit on top of his. This small offering was shared between them before and it felt like the most natural thing for both of them to do. So far this year was just an emotional roller coaster ride and they wouldn't have dealt with it so well if they hadn't been there for each other.

Kate felt completely at ease (if only for a short while) when Castle placed his hand on her knee. She enjoyed the warmth Rick's hand gave hers, the silenced continued but what was there to say exactly?

The time had come to say there goodbye's, I love you's and share last embraces till they'd met friends again. Kate was completely exhausted in every way possible. All she wanted to do was sleep, hoping sleep was an escape from the world she was in now.

Beckett climbed into the cab flowered closely by Castle. They headed to her apartment first, Rick could see was tied together only by her determination of not to let her feelings show anymore.

"Castle...she spoke softly looking out the car window that was covered in tiny water pebbles that had been streaked into thin lines. He looked at her intently her gaze turned to lock with his. "You can't... I can't." She couldn't speak, she couldn't tell him this in cab of all place's they needed privacy, and he deserved that at least. The cab pulled up outside her apartment. "Can we talk for a second?"

They walked into her apartment both signing at how exhausting the past weeks had been and today was just the cherry on top. Kate knew what she was about to say was going to trigger Castle to go off, but she needed to say this today or it wasn't going to have the effect that she wanted.

" Castle, sit down."

He sat at the kitchen bench on a bar stool, this wasn't good; no one ever has good news when they tell you to sit down.

"Castle..., Rick I,.." She didn't want to do this but she needed to it was the right thing to do. "I think.. I can't have you shadowing me anymore."

His eyes showed a mixture of emotions hurt was the most noticeable. She felt awful, but this was the only way he could stay safe and be able to go home to his family at the end of every day.

"No."

Why does he always have to be so stubborn, this is for his own good! Why can't he make it easier for both of us and except it. I want him to stay as much as he does! But it's to dangerous for him to shadow me anymore.

"Castle, you knew at some point that our partnership would have to end, you can't be my partner anymore."

" Why? Please tell me why exactly Kate. You can't just expect to say this to me now and have me feel ok with it!"

"Castle." She barked trying to get him to snap out of his small outburst.

"We have been partners for three years and now you're just dropping me?" He all but yelled.

"Because I care! I care about Alexis; I care about Martha, think of the tears running down the faces of Roy's family and tell me that's not how they would feel if you had gotten killed! Do you have any idea how guilty I would feel if that was to ever happen to you? I would never forgive myself!" Tears started to form in her eyes but she was determined to get her point across.

"How do you think I felt today standing close to a casket that had the body of my Captain lying inside? Following me around for research isn't worth the risk of dying; just the thought of you in danger makes me nauseous. You have been lucky to get by in the last three years Castle!"

Castle was shocked by every word that had just come out of her mouth. But he wasn't going to back down from this yet. " I have been lucky? Beckett I'm not trying to boast here but do you know exactly how many times I have saved your life? Nine times if I'm not mistaken and you know why I do that because I'm your partner! If you want to do the whole how would your family feel if you died thing fine! You have any idea how your family would survive if you were gone? Think about Lanie, Esposito, Ryan. Imagine Alexis, she looks up to like you have no idea and your father, he can't lose you Kate it would destroy him and you know it!"

"Castle, I'm a detective, it' my job I signed up for this, you didn't." She tried to be the calm one.

"It's still wouldn't stop us all from hurting. In the past three years I come to know this incredible woman I call my best friend and partner, I get to see, laugh and talk with her practically all day every day. I know when I first came here you didn't like me that much, but look at us now, we have come all this way, looked death in the eye, stared down some of the most heartless bastards New York has ever seen. The thought of having that pulled out from under me, it breaks my heart a little." The last part of the sentence was hushed as if he was letting his voice simply trail off.

Kate knew every word he spoke was sincere, she wanted to reassure him that they could still be partners, but she knew deep down what was best for him and his family. "Rick,... I care about you too much to have you in the kind of danger again, my mother's case is so much bigger than we both imagined and I can't focus on solving it if I'm too worried about your safety."

"Kate, don't please, just think about what you are saying."

Tears slid down her cheeks as she spoke, "I'm taking time off going to see my dad this summer. I think you should too." She stood up when he did. They exchanged a warm embrace before she opened the door she murmured "I will think about it Castle."

At least she had gotten that conversation over with, for now.

So what do you think? I know it's probably nowhere near what is probably going to happen but my fan girl is going a little crazy about the final and I think writing is a good way to cope let me know what you think? This is a one-shot for now if the final was to unbearable and I suffer during the break most likely I will. I will write another chapter but not until then! :) Thank you muchly!