Title: Most Wonderful Time

Rating: PG (for swearing?)

Warning: None, really

Pairings: Ratchet/Impact (OC), Prowl/ Jazz

Disclaimer: I do not own Transformers. I do not own the lyrics or the music either. The only thing I can lay claim to is Impact.

It's the most wonderful time of the year.

With the kids jingle belling,

and everyone telling you,

"Be of good cheer,"

It's the most wonderful time of the year.

There'll be parties for hosting,

marshmallows for toasting and

caroling out in the snow.

there'll be scary ghost stories and

tales of the glories of Christmases

long, long ago.

It's the most wonderful time of the year.

There'll be much mistletoeing

and hearts will be glowing,

when loved ones are near.

It's the most wonderful time of the year.

Eddie Pola, George Wyle 1963

"Okay, so explain this to me. Why do the two crankiest 'bots in the entire Ark, the ones that refuse to put up with any foolishness, endorse this stupid holiday? It's not even a Cybertonian holiday, for Primus sake!"

Jazz looked up from the decorations he was setting to study the young mech who had spoken. As part of the new rotation program he hadn't been on Earth very long, and coincidentally had just recently met the local medics. To say that the meeting had not gone well was an understatement.

"Because it is special 'round here, to a lotta 'bots. Don't knock it 'till you try it."

"Special? What's so special about it? And what is this?"

Jazz wandered over to look in the box, which he promptly took and placed on a table well away from his cranky helper. "Human stuff for the humans that will be coming early in the evening. They have a lot of traditions that go along with this holiday, and while there are a lot of them that we have not adopted, we still allow for them when we have company."

"Why?"

The mechs sullen tone really was starting to grate on Jazz, and normally easy going mech had to take a moment to rein in his temper. He'd have to be careful or the others would accuse him of letting his mate rub off on him too much. On the other hand, he was really starting to understand why Prowl had passed the punishment detail on to him. If the second in command had given it to anyone else the little twerp would have already been a scrap puzzle waiting in the med bay to be pieced back together.

"It supposed to be a time of the year for people to enjoy themselves. For everyone to enjoy themselves. So we have human activities when the humans are here, and once they leave we have our own party." He moved away to continue decorating. "Humans tend to refer to it as the most wonderful time of the year. They even have a song to that effect."

"Stupid." The mech commented as he pulled something green out of a box and waved it around. "What do I do with this?"

As soon as Jazz realized what it was he waved his hand around vaguely. "Oh, just hang it somewhere. It'll cause its' usual amount of amusement and mayhem, I'm sure."

"What is it?"

"Mistletoe. It's a human thing we adopted." Jazz smirked at some of the memories that that little bit of plastic and silk brought to the surface, and a part of his processor was immediately dedicated to figuring out how he was going to get his lover under it this year.

"And what do you do with it?" The mech eyed it for a moment before looking around for a place to hang it.

"Traditionally, if you can catch someone under it, they have to kiss you. We've made a couple of exceptions, but it's usually fun." Jazz's visor glinted bright, amused.

"Exceptions? What kind of exceptions?"

The note of panic in his voice had Jazz smothering a laugh. "Bonded 'bots are excused unless the one that catches them is their bonded. It's just safer that way. Younglings are excused too. Other then that, anyone and everyone is fair game."

"So if someone catches me…"

Jazz could see where his processor was going with that and really did start to laugh. "Calm down. You have the advantage because you are the one hanging it this year. Just remember where you put it and don't get caught under it. Unless there is some you want to catch you there…" The look he got in return made him laugh all the harder.

The party was in full swing by the time the medics showed up. In fear, and not really understanding what was going on around him, the young mech had attached himself to Jazz and his mate. So far both had resisted the urge to strangle the young 'bot, though they had come to a mutual agreement to cut him loose on his own as soon as the humans were gone.

Prowl, temporarily abandoned by his mate when Jazz went to assist Blaster with some sort of musical selection, contented himself with watching the party. He was also making a bet with himself, knowing the odds were in his favor, as to how long he had before the next question came up. In the end he had timed to within 1/100 of a second.

"Those aren't the same 'bots."

Well, maybe it really wasn't a question, but it broke the silence he had been enjoying, so Prowl counted it anyway. Jazz would have sided with him on this one. "Who are you referring to?"

The 'bot pointed to the medics across the room. "Them. There is no way those two are the same."

Prowl sighed. "Ratchet and Impact are the some medical officers they were in the med bay. They are simply off duty right now, just like everyone else present."

A snort of disbelief was the only reply he got, and Prowl chose to leave the subject alone. He had gone back to watching some of the humans who had imbibed a little too much of the drink they referred to as eggnog. For the safety if the humans present, any 'bot that reached a level of overcharge where they posed a danger to their guests was removed from the party. The only restriction placed on the humans was that they had to accept a ride home if they reached a certain level of overcharge, and Prowl had already spotted several who would warrant the attention of a 'designated driver' before the night was over.

A snicker from beside him drew his attention once more to his uninvited companion, and as the sound continued without explanation Prowl searched for the source of such intense amusement. His search gained him nothing.

"This is going to be gooooood."

Prowl frowned. "Would you care to explain that?"

He followed the pointing finger and finally processed that Impact had wandered under the location of the mistletoe. Since there was nothing else in that direction he still failed to see the amusement in the situation, and felt no hesitation in sharing his observation. "I am afraid you are going to be disappointed if you are looking for entertainment. While Impact and Ratchets disagreements have reached Ark disturbing decibels, neither of them are much inclined to participate in public displays of affection, mistletoe or not."

"But Jazz said anyone is fair game if someone catches them under there. Anyone except-." The entirety of Prowls' comment suddenly registered and the 'bot gaped at Prowl. "Wait- they're bonded?"

"Yes. And have been for almost thirty earth years. You didn't know?" Prowl sipped at his energon.

"No. They were fighting the first time I had to go to the med bay. I thought they couldn't stand each other."

"Nah." Jazz interrupted as he rejoined them. "That's jus the way the two of 'em work through things. I think it's almost a sport for 'em anymore."

"That makes no sense."

"Not everything in like makes sense kid." Jazz plopped down in a seat. "Better get used to it."

The mech grunted, watching in disbelief, watching as the normally stern medics mingled with the other guests. Jazz studied his expression for a minute, and then sighed. "You're still pretty new to all of this. Ratchet and Impact yell because they care. You watch- neither of them yells when someone is really hurt."

"Right." He didn't sound like he agreed, but he wasn't going to argue the point either. Instead the mech chose to skip subjects. "So what is so special about today?"

"What?" Both Prowl and Jazz looked up then.

"When we were decorating earlier you said they put up with today because it is special to them. What is so special about it?"

"Oh." Jazz chuckled a little there. "It's special for them because Ratchet asked Impact for permission to speak for her on Christmas one year. She said yes, obviously. And usually- yup, there they are."

The mech blinked, completely confused by Jazz until he noticed two other 'bots enter the room. A small femme and larger mech. Though both of them bore the Autobot symbol they were strangers to the mech.

"Whisper and Devcon, as usual." Was Prowl's only comment.

Before he could get clarification there was a mild commotion as the two newcomers were greeted by an excited Impact and an obviously pleased Ratchet. Everyone was so pleased, so happy, it was just confusing, and the mech frowned as he tried to make sense of it all.

He was so focused on trying to make sense of it that when his companions rose it startled him and he jumped. As they moved away Jazz paused. "You keep wanting to know what is so special about taday. The truth is, there is nothing about the date that makes it special. What makes it special is what ya choose to acknowledge today and durin'this time ah year- family, love, and friends. That's what makes it the most wonderful time of the year."

***Just a note: I tend to not post as much on now. Most of the writing I do post to the public is posted on my LJ account now.