Disclaimer: I don't own Harry Potter.
There are times, more and more frequent these days, that Lily wishes she hadn't married him. She does love him, but it is a bitter, unhappy love, caused by dependence more than any real affection. James does love her, in his own strange way, she knows. But his love is the love one bears for a prized possession more than anything else. He pays her compliments, but always spoils them by adding "even if you are" something or other vaguely insulting to the end of them. It wasn't always this way, of course. In school James was charming and pursued her, despite her reluctance. She grew tired, at long last, of having her boyfriends threatened. She agreed to be his girlfriend, hoping that if he had what he wanted, he'd grow tired of her and seek more elusive prey. Instead, he kept her close by his side, and became disturbingly possessive if any boy but himself or his friends spoke to her. For perhaps a month she thought James' rabid jealousy was endearing, and then she realized it stemmed from lack of trust. She tried to get the nerve to leave, but as the months passed, and he still had not found a new interest, she fell in love. Not with James, but with his carefree friend, Sirius Black. And so she stayed with James, just to be near the object of her unrequited affections. Now, she wishes she had not married him, that she had admitted to her belovedSirius how she felt about him. But now she is married to James and is mother to his child, no, their child. It's too late to turn back. And there are times, more and more frequent these days, that she wishes that she'd never gotten a Hogwarts letter at all.