A/N: This maybe my only way to get over it….

-December 15th 2009-

"…Tonight is the night." Shawn looked down at the floor, not wanting to see angry blue eyes. He heard a sigh and looked up.

"I don't know why you're going through with this… I thought we were happy here." She bit her lip.

Shawn sighed himself and ran his fingers through his long blonde hair. "Maybe you're happy here. But I'm not; I haven't been in a long time."

"Shawn, just because Becca—" He cut her off.

"Don't even go there Julia. It's not about that." He paused. "I'm not happy here, but I am happy with you."

She smiled weakly. "Just promise me that we won't lose this."

"I can't promise; but I'll try." He wrapped her arms around her slim waste. He planted a small kiss on her red painted lips.

She nodded. "That's all I need to hear. Now go get your award." She smiled.

He smiled back it her. "Don't worry. I will." Shawn walked out of his locker room, saying 'Hello' to fellow wrestlers passing by in the hall way. He walked over to the gorilla position and waited for his entrance music to hit.

"Okay Shawn. You can go." His theme music blared from the speakers, Shawn walked out, doing a little dance. He walked over to Hunter, shook his hand then hugged him.

Shawn talked about his legendary Wrestlemania 25 match with the Undertaker and held his slammy up. He went to walk away then stopped dead his tracks. "Undertaker, I came closer to beating you than any other opponent has. I know I can beat you." He moved his face closer to the microphone. "But more importantly, so do you.

"I'm throwing out a challenge, at Wrestlemania twenty-six. You versus me. One. More. Time." Shawn collected his slammy and walked backstage.

"That was awesome Shawn." Hunter commented. "So are you two fighting again?"

Shawn nodded. "God willing." Hunter chuckled at put his hand on Shawn's shoulder.

"Talk to you later man." Shawn nodded and both men walked their separate ways.

Shawn re-entered his locker room and saw Julia sitting on the bench in the middle of the room hugging her knees to her chest. Shawn walked over and sat beside her, he rubbed her back.

"What's wrong baby?" Shawn asked softly.

She sniffed. "Once you retire… what's gonna happen to us?"

Shawn sighed and hugged her tightly. "Nothing will happen to us. We can still be together…"

"How Shawn? We'll never see each other… you'll be at home and I'll be on the road. I'll hardly ever see you…"

Shawn opened up his mouth to say something but then closed it. "We can make it work."

All she did was nod.

"Want to go back to the hotel?" Shawn asked.

Julia wiped her running eyeliner then looked up at Shawn. "I thought we had to stay until Raw was over…"

Shawn shrugged. "Some rules can be broken."

She giggled. "Alright, let's go."

{H*B*K}

Julia rested her head on Shawn's chest, Shawn had one arm around her and the other on the steering wheel. "Have you told Hunter yet?..." She asked, almost in a whisper.

"About the match? Yes. About my retirement?... No."

She sighed. "Shawn you have to tell him; He's your best friend. Don't you think he has a right to know?"

"Yeah, I know. I'll tell him soon. I promise… I just don't know how to yet." He paused. "Taking the fact that DX will be over; he'll be able to handle. But the fact that one of the only guys that actually like him in the locker room is leaving… I don't know about that one."

"Still. I'll go with you; Hunter will have me to help him anyways."

He shrugged his shoulders. "I'll tell him soon. No worries."

The rest of the car ride was silent. Something was changing; they both felt it. Shawn parked the car; Julia leaned up and rubbed her face. "I don't feel so hot."

Shawn rubbed her shoulders. "Go up to the room. I can take our things up."

She nodded. "Kay." Shawn dug into his pocket and gave Julia the hotel room key. She scurried up the stairs and into their hotel room.

Shawn watched as she ran into the hotel and chuckled. He went around to the back of his rental truck and grabbed their gear bags, locked the truck and walked up to their hotel room.

He dropped their bags on the floor. "Babe?" He called. He walked over to the bathroom and peaked his head in. She was over the toilet, throwing up everything she ate that night. She was upset; not sick. He closed the bathroom door quietly and grabbed one of her suit cases.

He unzipped it, grabbed her some underwear, pajamas, and shower stuff.

"Babe, what are you doing?" She asked, scaring Shawn half to death, causing him to drop the shampoo.

He sighed. "I know you're upset. Why don't you take a long hot shower? Then we can watch some TV and I'll give you a backrub?"

She nodded. "Okay." Shawn handed her, her things and they smiled at each other. "Thanks Shawn."

"Anything for you." She kissed his cheek then headed into the bathroom.

Shawn cleaned of their bed then changed out of his clothes into some sweatpants. He let his long brown hair out of his half pony-tail and laid down on their bed. He exhaled deeply and wiped his eyes 'Is this really what I want…?' He thought, he wanted to retire and leave wrestling but he didn't want to leave Julia and Hunter. Shawn felt warm hands on his back and looked up to see Julia smiling at him. He smiled back.

"Lay down. I did promise you a back rub." He reminded her. She nodded and laid down next to The Heart Break Kid. She pulled his hair up off of her neck and back and into a pony tail. She pulled her shirt up in the back.

"Ready." She told Shawn. He nodded and gently began rubbed her back. He squeezed her shoulders then gentle massaged the tension out of them. He massaged her sides, her upper back and her lower back for awhile.

"How was that?" He asked.

"Awesome." She smiled and kissed him. "You're the best; I hope you know that."

"Don't worry; I do." He joked with her. Things were quite for a few moments, which was extremely unusual between the both of them. "I love what we have together." Shawn gave into the silence.

"Me too." Julia lied. What Julia and Shawn had was a relationship, but they weren't boyfriend and girlfriend, it was complicated. Shawn liked Julia a lot but he wasn't fully over his break up with his ex-wife Rebecca… he still kind of loved her and everyone knew it. While Julia was in love with Shawn and everyone seemed to understand that but Shawn.

-Flashback-

"Shawn, I really like you." Julia told Shawn again, out of the blue.

Shawn smiled, he had known that for awhile but just never said anything. "I know. I like you too."

"Then why can't we be together?" She looked down.

"Because," He sighed. "I'm still in love with her…."

She ran her fingers through her hair. "Why can't you just give me a chance?"

"I want to—"

"Then do it." She encouraged. "Shawn, I'll never leave you.."

"I know." He looked up. "I'm just not ready for that kind of commitment."

She smiled weakly and put her arm around Shawn. "We don't need a commitment. We can just be friends; with feelings for each other and benefits."

Shawn smiled back at her. "We can try that I guess." Julia leaned in and kissed Shawn's cheek.

"Hopefully this will turn into something more… But Shawn I'll never leave you. I promise." She hugged him.

"It will turn into something more. I can promise that. And I know… I think I believe you…"

-End of flashback-

And after almost two years of Shawn's bullshit; nothing had changed but she never left him. Julia had kept her promise… but Shawn hadn't. He knew she was lying but said nothing.

He looked down at Julia, who was peacefully sleeping on his chest. " I don't think I'll ever understand why you stand by me." He leaned up and kissed her forehead. "But I'm sure glad you do." He laid back down and closed his eyes and ended up falling asleep himself.

A/N: NO this is not a one shot you butlickers! Next update will be sooner than you think!