Unrequited Love
*Feeling a bit depressed at the moment….here's what came of it.
-Kait*
Disclaimer: Just so you know, I'm not J.K. Rowling, because if I was, I have the feeling I wouldn't feeling blue at all. So hurrah! Now that we've established that…
James's POV
Man. How stupid am I?
To think she could actually like me…or even want to talk to me.
Alright, I've come to the old-age conclusion.
She's too perfect for me.
I mean, she would never get herself into detention five times in one bloody day. She would never be able to manage that. She's not as brainless as I am. Besides, there isn't enough time in the day to have five detentions.
Hence why they all took until four in the morning the next day.
So that's why I was so tired, then.
But now I'm turning into a Sirius and going completely off topic only to make myself feel worse.
God, I must be depressed.
Either that or dead…at least I hope so.
And besides that, what even gave me the courage to go ask her out? She's made it incredibly clear that she hates me, and will continue to hate me until the day I drop dead.
Then I'm sure she'll hire a "Hallelujah!" chorus.
Wow…I've talked about my own death three times without laughing.
Must be some kind of record.
Someone better hand over the award before I die from shock.
(Well…if you don't say, I did it again…)
"I'd like to thank the academy and the girl who broke my heart to make it all possible…Let's give a big round of applause for the lovely Lily Evans!"
So….tell me again as to how the topic in my conscience landed on my funeral?
Sorry…rhetorical question there.
I guess it's a bit pointless to wonder why she said no. It's because I'm James Potter…there's no other reason for it. Had Remus asked her out, she would have gladly agreed to go, but because it's me (and I also happen to ask her this question nearly everyday), the answer is somewhere along the lines of no.
And each time I ask her, she gets more creative with the answer. A simple "no" won't do anymore. She feels it necessary to publicly humiliate me in the process by saying things like, "I'd rather be stuck on a date with Snape," (who she also has formed a disliking towards). Of course, in her defense, she thinks that every time I ask her, I'm trying to humiliate her in public. Which I'm not.
Wait, why am I defending her again?
Oh yeah…because I bloody well love her.
And it sucks.
It really does.
It is the worst feeling in the world; when you're in love with someone and they don't love you back. It makes it even more horrible when this girl pleads with you to leave her alone and stop feeling these feelings, but there's nothing you can do about it. I've wished day after day that I could fall out of love with her, so she'll be happy and actually smile again, but it isn't working so far. I'm still madly in love with her, even if she does hate me.
So…now that I've summed it all up for myself and also managed to make a complete fool out of myself in front of the girl I love; I might as well call it a day. Not much more could happen to make it worse.
Unless, of course, when I open the portrait hole in front of me, the girl of my dreams is sitting there looking perfect.
Which, I just found out, she is.
Only one in the Common Room, too. Now fancy that…
Oh no, she's just spotted me.
And wonderful…now she's glaring at me…
I suppose I should be used to it by now, but of course, as usual, I'm not. Surprise, surprise…
I'm still staring at her, looking pretty stupid I bet. God, she must think I'm going insane or something.
As she looks up again, her mouth opens, "Could you quit staring, Potter?"
Man, she's got a beautiful voice, even if when she only addresses me with it is when she is feeling angry.
"Sure, sure…" I call, as I head up the stairs to my dormitory. I took one last look at her and breathed deeply.
I can only hope that someday she'll love me the way I love her.