Disclaimer: I don't own Rurouni Kenshin. If I did, there would have been more romance in the anime... hehee.


Author's Note: Please don't get angry with me for what lies beyond. This idea came to me... And don't worry... it'll turn out okay. If I update, meh!






Out of Reach





It was raining. Something extremely significant always seemed to happen when it rained. Either she would be spending time with the wanderer who had stolen her heart in companionable silence–or it would be a time much like this, full of pain and her Rurouni was forced to remember his previous days as a hitokiri. She gulped and then closed her eyes. She raised her head to the sky and let the rain fall down her face. She felt empty when it rained.

A sound broke through the melodious patter of water, causing her eyes to snap open in shock. Pain coursed through from the source and it was nothing she had ever felt before. She blinked and fell to the muddied earth, hands clutching the katana where it lay unwanted in her stomach.

She couldn't hear. She wanted to. She needed to. She could see their mouths moving... his mouth trembling, but she couldn't hear what they were saying. She choked and tried to blink the rain out of her eyes, but realized--she was crying.

The pain was lessening but a foreboding eerie feeling took over her being and she struggled to keep her heavy eyelids open. She wanted to see him for as long as she was allowed. To remember every detail: his beautiful red hair, his violet/golden eyes, his cross-shaped scar. She wanted to take that with her. To be a part of her.

Finally, she couldn't fight it anymore. She closed her eyes and all the pain went away.



"KAORU...."










Drifting...


Spread out... she felt free but... what was she? Where was she?


So warm.


'Kaoru ... my name ...' She struggled with the vastness to make herself tangible. The gentle white began to mold and she found herself. She looked down at her callused hands. She felt her face and her hair and then settled a hand over her heart to feel its pulse. Then her hand froze over the gaping hole in her stomach. All the memories came flooding back to her and she suddenly felt very cold.

'Kenshin...'

She recalled a conversation she had with him one summer evening. She didn't remember why she had asked him, but he had answered and that was all that had mattered.


The two were sitting like an old married couple would next to each other on the porch, even though that was far from truth, watching nature in all of its glory. Kaoru's gaze flew to a blue jay that flapped down to the grass and then quickly changed its direction. She wondered if there would ever be happiness for her and Kenshin, as a couple. If it were possible.

"Do you believe in life after death?" She asked softly, watching the leaves rustle from the modest breeze that swept through them. He didn't turn to look at her but responded with a gentle yes. Kaoru let a few seconds pass before she asked another question. She always wondered if he was uncomfortable in times like this, where they were alone together, so she made it a habit to give him space. For the most part, she was always left wondering something. The Rurouni did not share as much of him as she would have hoped he would with her, by now, as a friend.

"Do you believe in reincarnation?" Her eyes fell upon a solitary red rose growing amongst a few stubborn weeds she had tried to eliminate not too long ago.

"It might be possible. Our spirits must go somewhere after we die. Maybe to a place where we wait for those whom we cherish, to be with them again. Or maybe," he turned to regard her, "our souls are reborn so that we can start again and make more friends than enemies. Live life better than before and repent for past sins committed." He searched her eyes.

"Why do you ask, Kaoru-dono?" She inaudibly sighed because of his never ending refusal to simply call her Kaoru when she had asked and even told him that he could numerous times.

"I wanted your opinion," she replied with a tender smile. He seemed somewhat perplexed by this.

"But Kaoru-dono, Sessha's opinions do not mean much. I am trained in the art of war and am lacking religious intellect. Although many teachings demand acceptance of death, they don't necessarily describe the result of it or what happens after."

"Kenshin no baka, of course your opinion matters. You are, without a doubt, a part of my family," she told him, displaying honesty in her big expressive eyes. His smile seemed pained and a little forced and so she didn't press any more. They looked again to the green of the grass and the trees, and wondered what really constituted the end and what would come to be thereafter.







Kaoru opened her eyes to find herself lying in an overgrown grassy field, looking up into an unbelievably blue sky. She sat up and tucked some of her black hair behind an ear and looked around. It seemed familiar but she felt odd. Like she shouldn't be there.

She inspected herself, she was wearing her favorite kimono but her hair was not tied in her ribbon. She looked over her hands again and was shocked to find them smooth and soft. There was no hole in her stomach and she did not feel the wind on her skin as she looked to the leaves visibly moved by it.

She heard laughter in the distance and it suddenly became louder as two children ran over to where she was, gasping in exhilaration for air. Their eyes sparkled in childish innocence and Kaoru realized she hadn't seen a genuine smile for a long time.

She didn't recognize either the boy or the girl and so she waited for them to speak first. The boy grinned, opened his arms wide, and fell into her body, embracing her in a familial way. She instinctively reacted by stroking his short, jet black hair.

"Sissy, mother sent us to find you," the girl explained. "She said you probably have some questions."

Kaoru nodded and followed the two to their abode. She took in the sight with wide eyes. It looked invitingly cozy and humble. And a mother was waiting inside. And she had a sister? And possibly a brother... She entered rather dumbly and walked around till she found whom she presumed to be the one the girl had told her about. The older woman was preparing food. She turned to Kaoru upon her arrival and an aged smile spread across the woman's face. Kaoru couldn't help but return it.

"How are you feeling my dear?" She asked in a concerned loving voice. Kaoru sat down in the closest available seat. The old woman didn't wait for an answer and went on to talk about the laundry.

"Could you go get it for me?" She asked with soft eyes. Kaoru nodded, forgetting that she was the one who had questions, and left the house. She found the laundry just outside the door.

Kaoru stood just far enough from it for it to be in its own world, swaying to the breeze and allowing the sun to caress it. She imagined herself at her home, standing there and watching Kenshin observe the clothing even though she knew he was probably lost in thought rather than focused on the cloth drying before him.

She stepped up to the clothes and took them down, folding each individual article before setting it in the waiting basket. She then hauled the basket inside and the woman gave her another chore. She obliged without thought. Another task that reminded her of Kenshin.

After she finished raking the yard, she walked up to the woman, determined and set on actually getting in a word or two.

"Where am I and why am I here?" The woman knowingly smiled a more than pleasant smile and rocked the chair she was sitting in back and forth, her fingers nimbly knitting a scarf out of magenta yarn.

"You are neither living nor dead. You came here because of something," she made eye contact with Kaoru, "or someone."

'Kenshin....'

"This place," the woman continued, "is for souls like yours. Which is why you'll find so many, like the children." Kaoru looked away. Nothing had set in yet. She couldn't believe this.

"What do I have to do to... leave?" She asked, expecting a dreadful mythical task that she would have to complete.

"It's not up to you," she answered, looking up through the ceiling towards the sky.