Disclaimer: I don't own the Bible or any of it's characters.

Note: I posted this story before under the name Jesus Christ: Son of God or another curst angel? , and now I'm re-posting it. All information in this fic is most likely incorrect. But that's why it's called fiction, hahaha. Most people will find this story offending, but for the sake of art, I'll post it anyway. It's called freedom of speech. Flame ahead. I've grown from last time.

Very important for you all to know. This fic was not made with the intention to solely bash Christianity. The story actually has a PLOT and some WISE LESSONS, if one is open enough to look past the jokes and read between the lines.

Warning: Parody of Jesus life. Insanity ensues.

PLEASE READ AND REVIEW!

"Faster!"

Mary and Joseph raced through the streets as if the Devil himself was chasing after them. Sirens made loud noises and red and blue lights flashed. They were in big trouble. The police was chasing after them and they weren't happy.

"Hurry or we'll miss the plane to Bethlehem."

The police were catching up with the couple.

Why were they chasing after them? The answer of this question was simple. Mary and Joseph had been caught with some coke in their pockets. The two of them had been in the drugs business for awhile and this time they've finally been caught.

Bethlehem. Why of all places did they choose to go to Bethlehem? Because, the police of Israel did not have the guts to go inside Bethlehem. The Palestinians had taken over that place and they had placed bombs in the whole area. Israel and the Palestinians talked exclusively of war these day. But it was the year 2000. (1) And people believed that this year would be the year when the world would change. The year when paradise would arise.

Faster. The two were almost at the airport…

"Ouch!" Mary winced.

"What is it, Mary?" Joseph asked irritated.

"The baby is kicking me!"

Mary was pregnant and time was running out on her.

Joseph rolled his eyes in frustration, grabbed Mary's arm and yanked the pregnant woman with him. "No time for the baby now. RUN!"

"HEY, STOP THAT PLANE!"

In the plane.

"God, we made it!" Joseph said, while wiping the sweat off of his forehead.

"That's it!" Mary screamed and in her anger she slammed her fist on Joseph's head.

"Oww!" Joseph winced. His right hand came up to rub the abused spot.

"I'm out of the drugs business," Mary stated. She crossed her arms over her chest in a manner that did not tolerate any objection.

Joseph stared at Mary, his mouth hanging open from disbelieve. "Just like this?"

"Yes, just like this."

Joseph bit his bottom lip, while thinking over Mary's words. He came to only one conclusion. It had to be one of Mary's moods. After all, she was pregnant. Yep, that just had to be it.

"All right," Joseph said, "how about we join Al-Qaeda?"

Mary felt like banging her head against the chair in front of her.

(1) It's not the year 2000, but you'll just have to deal with that, lol.

STAY TUNED...