Title: Fool's Paradise
Author: snarkysweetness
Rating: PG-13
Pairing: Skyeward with the team
Summary: With the snap of a mad Titan's fingers Skye finds herself forced to confront a ghost from her past.
Warnings: Infinity War spoilers & character deaths, which you can blame on Marvel.
Disclaimer: I haven't fucked with this mess of a show since the disaster that was season two and what they did to Skye so don't expect this to be true to any sort of show canon.
Author's Notes: I had to watch Infinity War three times to numb the pain so now I must inflict it on the rest of you. Sorry, I don't make the rules.
"Any clue why Fury wants us underground instead of out there helping with this mess?" Skye strode through the hangar doors alongside Bobbi, failing to hide her irritation. With Bobbi's skills and Skye's powers they should be out there with the Avengers, not trapped on this base hiding like cowards.
"I don't think he's sure what this mess is. Stark's missing, the other Avengers are still on the run, no one knows what the hell is going on."
"Oh, I know what's going on. More alien invaders hellbent on killing us all. That's all I need to know."
Bobbi smirked. "Since when are you so eager to fight?"
"Since the last time creatures from another planet attacked I lost someone I loved," Skye said without thinking, then, realizing her admission, added: "And don't forget when the Chitauri invaded Coulson died and this time there's no miracle drug to bring him back."
Skye could feel Bobbi's pity eyes, but she ignored them because something felt off.
"What is it?" Bobbi asked as Skye froze in the middle of a hallway.
Skye lifted a finger to her lips to 'shush' Bobbi. Spinning slowly in place, she listened closely, her intuition telling her something was wrong.
"Do you hear that?"
"Hear what? It's dead quiet."
"Exactly!" Cold spread through her veins as she fought back a wave of nausea. "Coulson called us back to the base hours ago, we should be the last ones here, which means the base should be-"
"Bustling," Bobbi finished.
Their eyes met for a moment, both worried, and without a word they continued, searching the base for signs of life.
"This way," Skye whispered, leading Bobbi towards Coulson's office. She could feel a faint, humming vibration that grew stronger the further they climbed up the stairs. When they were within earshot Skye realized the humming was voices, but when they arrived they found the team staring up at the projection screen in silence, horror etched into their faces.
Before Skye could focus on the news report, she caught movement in her peripheral.
"What are you doing alone, little one?" Skye whispered, plucking Peggy up off the floor and cradling the toddler to her chest before setting her sights on the girl's parents.
Jemma was nearly collapsed over in tears while Fitz gripped her shoulder, keeping her upright, his mouth hanging half-open. Coulson had gone pale while both Mack and Elena looked ready to be sick. May on the other hand had her fingers gripped around her gun, ready for a fight.
"Holy fuck," Hunter muttered, shaking his head as Bobbi took hold of his arm.
The moment her eyes focused on the screen she understood their despair.
Arial footage showed hundreds of things swarming the Wakandan border. The images were nothing short of carnage. Skye's stomach went sour as a sick feeling that they were losing settled in. Skye couldn't make out who was who in the chaos, but their guys were outnumbered. They were witnessing the Avengers being decimated with their own eyes.
It was soul crushing.
And then, without warning, the feed began to crackle, like static on an old television, followed by the news 'copter crashing to the ground. A loud explosion rocked through the speakers before the feed cut to black.
Skye's heart raced in her chest and the baby in her arms was the only thing keeping her from falling to the ground in anguish.
The air shifted. Vibrations only she could sense in the atmosphere changed. She became aware of the slowing heartbeats of the others in the room. And then something that she could only describe as anguish from beyond the walls of their base.
"What the hell happened?" Fitz muttered quietly as the feed returned to the news room and the anchors sat in a stunned silence before-
"Fitz!" A panicked Jemma cried as she stared down at her hands which were disintegrating into ash.
Skye clutched Peggy against her chest, shielding her eyes from the scene before them. She could feel Jemma's fear and pain and her life fading but she had to stay strong because there was no way in hell she was letting a daughter witness her mother dying.
"Bob?" Hunter whispered, his face going first while Bobbi's screams filled the air.
It all happened in the blink of an eye and yet there were no words to describe their suffering and her own grief as she watched every person she loved crumble into nothing. Just like Trip had in the underground city.
She was a plague. Everyone she loved died.
A blood-curdling scream filled the air and it wasn't until Skye stared down at the ash covering her hands and clothing where little Peggy had just been that she realized the screams were coming from her.
"Skye, look at me, it's going to be okay," May insisted sadly.
Her eyes moved to Bobbi. It was just the three of them now, but Skye could feel another life fading.
"No, please," Bobbi whispered, placing a hand on her pelvis, her face already stained with tears.
But Skye couldn't focus on her. Her vision grew dark and she could feel herself fading and she knew; she'd be joining the others in whatever hell she was destined for in death.
May pressed a tearful kiss to Skye's forehead, keeping Skye's focus on her face. "I love you, baby girl," she whispered. May's haunted gaze was the last thing Skye saw before she ceased to exist.
Skye had never given much thought to the afterlife. She didn't believe in a higher power or heaven or the Christian definition of hell. Once she'd imagined it was just another realm of existence, but when she'd nearly died at the hands of Ian Quinn she knew deep down that there was nothing waiting for her after death except darkness. She would simply disappear, as if she'd never existed in the first place. All her thoughts and dreams and hopes would be extinguished. In the grand scheme of things, her life meant nothing.
So, imagine her surprise when she not only found herself conscious in whatever hazy plane of existence she'd found herself in but that she wasn't alone.
"You died," she called at the figure lurking in the shadows.
Maybe 'lurking' wasn't the right word. He stood in the distance, staring out at the purple sunset, as if he'd been waiting for her.
He turned slowly and when his face came into the light she could see tears in his eyes and, somehow, she knew they were for her.
"So did you," he whispered sadly.
"What is this place?" She didn't want to think about what this meant, that the person here to greet her in death was him, and that despite all he'd done she was almost relieved to see him again.
"I don't know the name, but it seems to be some sort of purgatory. An in-between place to wherever it is you're meant to go next."
"And so, what? You've just been here for the past three years…waiting for me?"
He gave her a smile, one that reminded her of the time before his betrayal, when loving him hadn't felt like a crime.
"After Coulson murdered me in cold blood," Skye winced. Sure, it was the truth, but it still hurt to be reminded of it. The man who was the closest thing she had to a father had murdered the only man Skye had ever really loved. And while she'd done her best to justify Coulson's actions, meeting the other Ward, in the Framework, had brought back all the feelings she'd tried to bottle in.
He was right. She'd finally understood him, and she couldn't keep pretending to hate him, which made this encounter even more painful.
She realized now how much she'd missed him.
"I was stuck on that planet, like…a ghost, I guess. I knew I was supposed to move on, but I couldn't go and then when that thing took over my body, I knew he would try to hurt you, so I stuck around until I found a way to get into his head, to keep you safe."
Skye stared down at the grass, unable to look him in the eye. She'd known he was there, fighting Hive, all for her, but it hurt too much to admit. Because he was dead. And then he'd gone and died again in that ship.
They'd never stood a chance, had they?
"After the explosion, I woke up here."
"Where are the others?" Skye asked, needing to change the subject.
He shrugged. "Moved on, probably. This is just a pit stop on the way to where they're meant to go next. Those who don't get sucked into the flames, that is. I think this is the place where you get to see whoever you need to see most before you're finished."
"Then why isn't the rest of the team here? Trip? Anyone else?"
She knew why, but she didn't want it to be true. She didn't want to admit he was the only person she wanted to see before she was gone for good.
"Have you been waiting around…for me?"
"Everyone dies sometime, and I hoped if I stayed, I'd at least get to you see you one more time.
Besides, I think we both know that wherever I'm meant to go after this will be somewhere where I'm meant to suffer for my actions."
Skye didn't know how it was possible to cry in this dimension, but her cheeks were wet and when he reached out to wipe them away she didn't pull away from his touch.
This was so incredibly fucked up in a million different ways.
"Just tell me why," she whispered, knowing the answer but needing to hear it from him.
"John was everything to me, until I met you. I know now that wasn't really love but I was stupid and loyal, and I regret everything I did to make you hate me, but I can't regret that it all led me to you."
Skye closed her eyes, more tears spilling.
She really hated him sometimes.
"I wish I'd been enough for you," Skye whispered, finally admitting to herself and to him the real reason she'd been so angry with him for so long. They'd all done horrible things over the years and somehow found ways to forgive themselves and each other and Ward had done no worse but the pain of knowing he hadn't loved her enough to choose her over John was a betrayal she could never get past.
He thumbed her cheek until she opened her eyes to find him smiling down at her sadly.
"Skye, loving you is the best thing that ever happened to me. Everything I did before they threw me in that vault to rot was to keep you alive. And everything I did after…that wasn't me, sweetheart; losing you broke what little bit of humanity and sanity I had left.
You were always enough, Skye; I was the one who was never good enough. You always deserved better."
It wasn't a lie, but she couldn't help but feel that if she'd done more, not written him off like he was nothing, that things would be different.
But none of it mattered anymore. Nothing mattered anymore. They had no use for regrets. Not here. Not ever again.
"I'm so sorry," Skye whispered, reaching up to stroke his cheek while she fought back tears.
Ward pressed his forehead to hers as she struggled to breathe, the weight of everything crashing down on her, too strong for her to bear.
She cried for the lives they could have had, for the loved one's she'd lost, and for all the things yet to come. And then she cried some more as the realization that she was dead fully settled in. She wasn't ready to go, she had so much fight left in her, so much she wanted to live for, like the family she'd never get to have because the thought of finding someone else, someone who wasn't him was unacceptable.
And she was terrified. The fear was suffocating. She'd come close to death once and hadn't felt a thing but now, knowing at any moment she'd be taken from this place to and that she had no idea what came next was crippling.
"I'm not ready," she sobbed as the sky grew dark. Their time together was coming to an end, she could feel him slipping away.
Ward pulled her closer and pressed his lips to hers desperately. She could taste his tears as he wrapped his arms around her, kissing her like it was the last time he'd ever kiss her. And when it hit her that it was the last kiss either one of them would ever have Skye threw her arms around his neck and kissed him back just as desperately.
"No, please," Skye cried when he broke away, still holding her face in his hands.
"It's time, Skye."
"I can't lose you again," she pleaded, shaking her head.
He stared down at her sadly and brushed away a stray tear.
"I love you more than anything," he whispered as the fog around them grew thicker. "I will always love you."
"Grant, don't go," Skye cried, her body trembling. "Don't go where I can't follow, please," she pleaded. She wanted to follow, to take his hand and go with him, but she could feel a force pulling her back.
"I'm not the one going," he whispered with a small smile. "Goodbye, sweetheart."
"I love you too!" Skye called just in time to see him smile one last time and then a force stronger than any she'd ever felt violently ripped her away from the in-between.
"Baby girl, what's wrong?"
Skye opened her tear-filled eyes to find May staring down at her with that same haunted gaze.
Her heart skipped a beat as she began to question her reality. As she glanced towards the others who had died with her she saw the same trauma she felt reflected back on their faces and she knew it had all been real. They'd died and now they were all back somehow.
All but the two missing members of their team whose absences would always leave a void in her heart.
"Oh, my sweet girl, come here," Jemma whispered as she took Peggy from Skye's arms and began pressing kisses to her face while she cried.
"Bob? Are you both…okay?" Hunter fretted, placing a hand on the tiny bump no one else had noticed until now.
"I don't know," she admitted, tears in her eyes.
"We'll get you examined," Jemma offered, burying her lips in Peggy's curls while she rocked the fussy toddler gently.
"Skye?" May stroked Skye's hair, worry etched into her face as her eyes moved between Skye and Coulson.
"I'm fine," Skye insisted, lying. "Go to him," she whispered, knowing how hard it was for May to ignore the instinct to go rushing to his side.
May gave Skye a final once-over and once she was satisfied that Skye wasn't going to have a meltdown she moved to Coulson's side and wrapped her arms around him.
Skye averted her eyes, finding that all of these couples reuniting left her feeling more alone than ever.
Sure she wouldn't be missed, she very slowly made her way down to her room, finding it harder than it should be. Apparently dying and being brought back to life really did a number on the body.
Skye knew there was work to be done, lives to be saved, messes to clean up but she locked herself in her room anyway, needing just a few minutes to herself for once.
Closing her eyes, she fell onto the edge of her bed, letting the tears come.
She swore she could still feel his presence and when she brushed her fingers across her lips she could feel how swollen they were. And then she wept. For him. For Trip. For the life, and children, she'd never have. And for the lonely, hard years she had ahead of her.
A breeze brushed past the back of her neck and Skye opened her eyes, half-expecting to find him grinning down at her with that stupid, smug look of his.
Once again reminded of her loneliness, Skye let her body fall back onto the mattress and stared up at the ceiling, wishing for some magical way to bring someone back from the dead. And while she knew magic was real and that something had brought her back from the dead, she knew better than to hope there was a way to bring her bad boyfriend and best friend back. She suspected you'd need bodies to pull that off and wow, her thoughts were turning really morbid.
"Skye?" Coulson called, knocking on her door. "Nick's on the line…you…well, I know you'll want to know what happened and according to him it's quite a long story."
"Coming," Skye called, not really caring about what really happened. For the first time her curiosity was nowhere to be found. Maybe dying had cured her of that character flaw.
"You're perfect."
Skye could swear she'd heard his voice aloud and not in her head.
"You're going to be a mess for days, Skye," she muttered, knowing this was a side effect of being brought back.
But when her hand reached for the door handle and another light breeze brushed along her skin she began to wonder if maybe his ghost had followed her home.
Staring back into her room, she smiled at the thought.
Maybe she wasn't alone after all.