I walk down the streets in the dim morning light, its January but I of course I only had enough sense to wear a thin fleece jacket, Kyouya always says I don't have the greatest amount of common sense. Of course he means that in the most loving way possible, I know that by now, fact is, I even knew that back to when we first met.

When we first met, I was introduced to him as an exchange student from Paris; he was to show me around the school. I remember admiring him, the way he stood so tall and how all the other students seemed to look up to and admire him as well. He had dark brown eyes that looked like they could see straight though to your core, and when he looked at you, he really looked at you. I didn't know it then but that fire that ignited in the pit of my stomach that day, was deeper than admiration, it was love.

He took care of me in a way I suppose, in the beginning with things like assignments and studying but by the end of our freshman year, I knew I could tell him anything. I told him of my father, how he left me before I even knew him, and of my mother, the person in my life whom I admired most, she was strong but poetic and didn't abandon me when my father abandoned her. He listened with silence and sympathy only a best friend could display.

I tried to get him to open up to me, but it wasn't easy. He hated talking of his father, I secretly thought it couldn't be that bad, but I was proven wrong. He told me how he was the youngest, how his brothers didn't even try and his father thought they were the most wonderful, talent boys in the world, how Kyouya devoted the better part of his high and middle school years to being the best at everything, so maybe his father would notice his accomplishments. It never worked all he saw was a failure. He told me one time, his father had come home drunk from a business party, when Kyouya was about 6. He had been talking and laughing with this lady, someone Kyouya had never seen anyone like before. She wore a dress, which looked too small for her, tall boots and her cheeks, eyelids and lips were covered in a harsh pink. Now of course he recognized her as a prostitute.

She bent down, putting her face at the same level as his, pinched his check and remarked something such as, "well aren't you just the cutest," his father only pulled her away, giving him a sour look. She followed hiccoughing drunkly. They were upstairs for what seemed like for hours and when he heard muffled cries coming from his father's room, being only six Kyouya had wondered what was going on in there. He crept up the stairs quietly, avoiding his brothers and the staff. At one point though, he did run into his brother, he told him,

"Kyouya, I know what you're doing don't go in there." He said nothing, but nodded obediently. "I'm serious, you'll regret it if you do." He crept on once his brother was out of sight, in his room.

Opening the door, just enough to take a peek, he saw movement coming from under the covers, a sort of up and down motion. Then there heads appeared from under, both of their hair was ruffled. The woman's eyes shifted to the door she let out a startled yelp and Kyouya quickly shut the door, not knowing what to do he hid in one of the spare rooms closets. He heard unclear voices from the room and then the door slam, about a minute later his father came, looking for him. He slammed doors and screamed his name. Tears welled up in his eyes as his father threw open the closet door, grabbed him by the wrist and shoved him on his stomach onto the guest bed.

The rest he could even describe to me, but I can only imagine.

I know now, that's why he only displays his hard outer shell to the world, his inner self is too fragile, he just can't be hurt any more. Maybe that's why he fell in love with the happy-go-lucky person I used to be in high school.

I confessed to him our third year. I didn't expect him to feel the same way, but I could go on with him thinking I only thought of him as a friend. I remember my whole face burning and emitting red hot heat. Also I remembered that was the first time I saw Kyouya blush, admitting he felt the same way. We didn't have a physical relationship right away, or soon after even.

We officially came out at our graduation, keeping it a secret for almost a year and a half, every time we would say something romantic to one of our host club clients; we would meet each other's eyes as if saying it to each other. In short, that was the year we each became the least popular among the ladies. When we told our friends at the ball, that we had come together as lovers, they were less than surprised. They told us they had always expected it, but didn't want to bring it up until we were both comfortable with talking about it. They were supportive.

Graduation was also when we shared our first kiss, short and innocent, something I'd been longing for, for what seemed like an eternity. It was like until then the earth had been still, and the moment our lips met it took off in full motion, with the force of a thousand jet engines, more than enough to knock me off my feet, it was like light bursting in through the darkest cave, in a beautiful kaleidoscope pattern and colors.

It was the best 10 second of my life.

But then we noticed, his father saw from his table.

He stood up and we both knew, this wasn't going to end well. He blamed me, he screamed in my face for corrupting his youngest son's mind with my "evil homosexual ways" he told Kyouya that he would get him help, to repair what I had done, he started to drag him away, when Kyouya slapped him across the face. His father stood there stunned, and Kyouya told him,

"WHAT HE'S DONE?"

"HOW ABOUT WHAT YOU'VE DONE, YOU BASTARD! YOU NEVER LOVED ME! YOU NEVER DID! IT WAS NEVER ENOUGH! IT WAS NEVER ENOUGH!"

I took him by the hand and told him he could stay at my estate, but my grandmother did not approve. She told me she loved me, but couldn't support her grandson having a homosexual relationship. Then Hikaru and Karou stepped in and told us we could stay with them.

Soon though, Kyouya found a job writing the odd article for the business column in a local newspaper and I found one as a cashier at a grocery store. We have a small one bedroom apartment in a lower middle class neighbourhood and while it's not the ideal lifestyle, as long as I have Kyouya, life is wonderful.

I'm pulled back into reality by the realization that I'm now several blocks away from our apartment, downtown and that the early morning chill is warming at the feet of the sun. I remember why I've come this way, groceries. I open the door to ULTA supermarket, ah yes; this is the place I work, except only on the weekdays.

"Hey Tamaki," Yuki, my co-worker, greets me from behind a register.

"Hey Yuki, how come you're working on Saturday?"

"Had to get some extra hours, I'm broke right now, damn collage is so expensive."

Ah college, I would like Kyouya to go, he would get more out of it than I would at least, but he says he won't have his lover working at ULTA 10 hours a day while only he gets to go.

"Ah I see, were do you go again?"

"Tomoya Sate"

"About how much is it a semester?"

"***** yen, plus text books and things," he pauses for a moment, "You thinking of going back?"

"Nah," I shake my head, "Not me. Anyways I gotta run, see yah later Yuki-kun."

"See yah"

Huh, ***** yen hey? That's not too bad; maybe I could follow Yuki's lead and pick up a couple more hours, so Kyouya can go back. Although he says he doesn't care if he goes or not, I know him better than that, he's aching to go. Plus I have most all of my bonuses saved up, and Kyouya could easily get a scholarship for anything he chooses, I wonder…

I get only the basics, rice, plain sushi, curry sauce and instant ramen. Oh what a fascination I used to have for "commoner items" they were such a novelty to me back then that is until one of my major food groups became instant ramen.

I'm walking back lost in imagination, imagining my lover, my precious Kyouya earning a degree and becoming a sell made success, showing his father a thing or two, when I bump into this lady.

"Oh I'm sorry ma'am, I didn't-"

Our jaws unhinge slightly as we take each other in.

"Haruhi? Is, is that you?" Though I don't expect her to, she nods. I'm taken aback by this now what do I say, I need the perfect ice breaker…

"How's the Neo-Nazi's treating you?"

INTERNAL FACE PALM