A gift fic for H-thar! She has helped me so much, and kept projects going, and has been an awesome friend. So I did this little number for I had NO CLUE what to put for categories. I sat there for several minutes, agonizing over it. Ugh. I still don't know if the ones I put fit it. I hope you're not too mad at me for that-I really had no idea.

To H-thar: I hope this is kind of what you meant, or what you imagined. I had fun writing it and I hope you'll enjoy it. Thank you. *hugs*

This is mostly Hope-centric, so he's the only character mentioned in the character category for this story. But it does include hints of HopexLightning(very tiny). I hope you all enjoy as well. But mostly you H-thar! :)

Hope is the thing with feathers.

-Emily Dickinson.

"She's missing."

"What do you mean, missing?"

"T-they think she might be dead, Hope."

The room was small and circular; the walls were lined with wooden shelves stacked with books of all kinds. The large, multicolored, bound texts were stuffed to bursting on the shelves, some poking out of their places on the ledges. Desks were positioned in the center of the room, but only two of them were occupied, one person at each desk. The one window took up an entire wall of the room-but it added no light to the space. Dark clouds were churning, deep black and gray, and dimming the already poorly lit room.

A silver-haired teen was staring out this window, his chin resting in his hand, and his book forgotten on the desk. His green eyes were half-lidded, and his slow blinking and small yawns signaled that soon his head would fall into his book. His legs were stretched out underneath the desk and he was slowly lowering his head to the book, the words on the pages lulling him to sleep. Equations were quickly becoming the word of soft, easy music; to not rest despite their chimes was almost insulting.

Just for a second-

"Estheim!" His head snapped up so fast it cracked and he bit back a wince, shuddering slightly as he opened his eyes and stared at the woman in front of him. Her arms were crossed and she had a sharp frown on her face. Her brown hair was drawn back into a tight bun and her eyes were flashing. She arched her eyebrow and Hope sighed and gathered his book.

Or I could just go. No sleeping in study rooms, after all.

The woman nodded at him and tilted her head toward the door, but Hope was already walking out. He ignored the small, hushed giggling of the other teen at the desk. He slipped his slender form out of the door and started down the stairs, his feet tapping lightly on each step. He ran a hand through his hair, blowing out another sigh and looking back toward the ceiling, even as his feet wobbled on the next step.

I guess I should call dad soon and let him now how I'm doing. If I don't call he gets all worried and then he starts talking about mom and-

Yeah, don't need that.

And I should call Snow soon too, see if he's heard anything about Lightning. I mean-something right?

Right?

But the hope of news of Lightning sounded dead to his own ears. The chances that something had changed in only two days -and three years- were slim at best, and in all honesty, Hope wasn't sure he was willing to try again. Not if Snow would attempt another of his awkward, maybe this will cheer you up, talks. The kind that made Hope's face really hot and his stomach tighten oddly-and maybe had him shouting if Snow tried to mention something along the lines of "crush"or "first love".

Where did you go, Lightning? I mean-we had saved the world. Sure, we're on Pulse now, and Fang and Vanille were gone-but what happened? Did you leave? Did someone take you?

Are you alive? Dead? Safe? Hurt? What?

Light...

Hope's heart jumped and his head snapped up when his foot missed the last step, and he slammed his eyes shut and threw his arms out in front of him. His book flew from his hands and he crashed into the ground, body throbbing on impact, especially his stomach. He groaned, resting his cheek on the cool floor, and he slowly peeked his eyes open.

"Well, that was graceful," he muttered. Hope glanced around, pushing himself up and scooping his book from the floor. He sighed and stood up, fixing the sleeves of his blue jacket and hurrying down the hallway. At least no one saw that. That's something, huh?

Hope shook his head and turned the corner, eying the cream colored walls before his eyes swept to the double doors ahead of him. He could see a small tree tucked by one of the darker, brick red buildings just across the pathway, and his chest loosened when he saw the no one was around. As he pushed the doors open he was hit by a cool breeze and he glanced at the sky, surveying the dark clouds.

"I hope it doesn't rain," he mumbled, heading for the tree and tugging on the sleeves of his jacket again. "I don't feel like hurrying back to my dorm right now."

Hope slowed when he reached the tree and plopped down on the grass, shuddering when he felt wetness leaking through his slacks. He ran his fingers through the blades of grass, narrowing his eyes as his hands were slicked with water.

"Awesome." Hope rolled his eyes and leaned his back on the tree, letting his book fall into his lap and laying his hands out at his sides. "I guess I should get going soon...I have to do that project with the others. And I still have to call dad."

Hope blinked, then slowly closed his eyes, letting out a heavy breath from his nose.

It's all so normal. So boring. So...

I don't know. Wrong?

I want to find Lightning. I want to help build this new world-I want to be a part of something.

I don't want this. At least...I don't think I do. Maybe I'm thinking too much. Dad says it's best to relax after what I went through, but I have and I still-I don't feel like I'm doing the right thing. But even if I went to search for Lightning, where would I start? It's not like I got some-some weird vision like when we were all branded. And even then, it hadn't been helpful, so why should that change?

I'm going around in circles. What's the point-

Hope stopped and jumped, his hands flying to his stomach again as it tightened, and for a moment he thought he had landed harder than he though when he had hit the stairs. But even as he curled his fingers on the skin of his stomach, gritting his teeth and hissing, the pain did not subside. If anything, it only flared more, and his head was starting to throb. His temples in particular were pounding, and he could feel the skin under the vein going up and down, up and down, up and down-

"Are you searching for her?"

Hope's eyes snapped open, but the campus was gone. Everything was gone. He wasn't even sitting against the tree anymore-just floating. Floating in some darkness, stretching endlessly before and after him. He tried to move, tried to kick his legs or wave his arms, but they stayed hanging at his sides. He swallowed hard, sweat trickling down his head.

And still, his temples were pounding.

"Are you searching for Lightning?"

The voice-it was calm and low, gentle but...commanding. It was a woman's voice but he thought he could hear an echo to her words. But there as no sign of her-no sign of anyone.

"And would you fight as well? Fight for her? What of your companions? Fang...Vanille. The two who sacrificed for Cocoon-for Gran Pulse. And would you fight for me? Would you fight for me-your unknown savior? Would you..."

Hope swallowed again, eyes searching the darkness. He was scared-he could feel it in the way his body shook and his racing heart. This unknown voice-this unknown person, who whisked him to this place and was asking weird questions. Asking if he'd help her, and he knew he should have said no.

But it was Lightning.

He nodded to the voice, wondering if she was expecting that, or for him to speak. The action itself sent ripples of pain from his head down to his spine, tingling and popping as it traveled. He opened his mouth, felt the world pressing against his jaw, but he forced the words out.

"Anything. Anything for Lightning." His voice was hoarse and it burned his throat, but he pressed on. "Anything for Fang...Vanille. I want-want to find them. I want to find her."

He heard the voice hum before something warm wrapped around him. It was soft and tickled his face, light touches that made his skin erupt in bumps, and then he was falling away from the world. The voice carried after him, becoming distant while the world bottomed out.

"I give you this hint and the promise of my guiding hand. Take it, and together, we shall right what has been wronged."

He wanted to ask what she meant, how it would lead to Lightning, but his voice was lost to the rushing wind, and soon everything was gone in a world of darkness and light touches.

Hope gasped and sat up, drinking in air and glancing around. His hands were shaking and his heart was trying to pump itself out of his chest, but the campus came back into view and slowly, carefully, he leaned back against the tree. He rested his head against the bark, shaking his bangs out of his face and letting out a small, sad laugh.

"A dream. And a really freaky one...but still a dream," he muttered, working his jaw and closing his eyes. He waited until his heart slowed down before opening his eyes again. "I don't even know why-" Hope made to push himself up, gathering his book from his lap, but he stopped when something soft brushed against his fingers. He blinked, looking down at his lap, his eyes snapping to a small, white feather half caught between his fingers.

"What..." Hope stood up, using the tree as his support, his eyes glued to the feather. The fluttery threads of the feather moved as he stood, and he dropped his book to get a firmer grasp of the feather. He held it by the tip, twirling it in his fingers, and his chest swelled for some reason. He blinked hard and fast, smiling to himself. "Getting worked up over-over a feather but-"

"Start your journey in a barren land, where time is still. Past the small settlements that now dot Gran Pulse, down the ravines. The rocks are gray and permeate deadness. The sky is darker than this one. But you will find a feather, just as this, and this first step toward Lightning, Fang, Vanille...and me, is taken."

Hope's eyes widened at the voice in his head and his breathing quickened. He looked around, spotting a few students that started to wave and call after him, but their voices were deafened by the buzzing in his own head and the echoing of the woman's words.

But...how? I'm not a l'Cie anymore-I don't-

"I am with you. Trust in me and in yourself. A power will be born, free from the shackles of such despicable servitude."

Hope shuddered and nodded, tightening his hold on the feather, his heart racing again and hands shaking. His eyes were wide and stuck on the feather, but he didn't see it.

It's reckless and stupid and-and I shouldn't just disappear on some weird-crazy dream. I shouldn't disappear like this-I shouldn't go off like this-

I shouldn't.

He took a deep breath and whipped around, running down the pathways and through the grass, mind flashing to things in his dorm room that he could use.

I have a little money in my wallet, and I can probably pull some out of my account to get to these settlements. And I'll need to pick up my boomerang-or get a new one. Dad will get suspicious if I just ask for it, and it might take too long to get here anyway. I'll need potions too, and some painkillers.

I wonder if I could pick up a mana drive somewhere? Snow might know...but I'd have to wait until I was far away to even ask for it, or he might come get me. Or join me. Or something. And even then, he might still tell dad.

I'll figure that out later, I guess.

And he kept running, the plans forming in his mind faster than he thought they would, and the feather clutched tightly in his hand.

But one thought was burned in his mind. Was flashing over and over, refusing to leave him.

I will find you, Lightning.

I promise.