A/N Hey guys! this is a new story! I started this because I needed to get my creative juices flowing so I hope you love it. I just need a break 14yss: the beginnning of the end...so yeah this is sort of based off of what happened with a friend of mine so its realistic-fiction...somewhat. I hope you enjoy.

I looked hopelessly at them. Both their stares cold and detached. I was angry and hurt and felt so betrayed I couldn't bare to continue this conversation any longer. Looking at my past love and my potential love, I thought it was it for me. Happiness wasn't for me and it will never be. I would be that cold heartless bitch forever. Nothing could save me from my misery.

"Leah, you're just going to have to move on." Sam spoke with a firm voice, when I heard it I felt as if heavy cinder blocks were pushing down on me.

"I know." I said dully.

"It's not that we don't think you're a good wolf its just-"

"Its just that you and Jacob believe that I am just here to bitch and be a burden." I stated.

"It's not that, its just-" Jacob tried to reason with me but it fell on deaf ears as tears started to form in my eyes.

"It's just that I don't belong with either of you." The tears slipped from my face then. I am not sure whether they understood my double meaning then but then again I don't think they ever will understand.

They would never understand how much they meant to me.

They would never understand the place they had taken in my heart.

They would never understand the pain they have caused me.

~XOXO~

Deandrea

I waited. All I could do was wait. I couldn't sit here and cry and sob helplessly like my friends. I could wear a worried expression like my friend Bryce and tap my foot impatiently across the floor like Sean was. But I couldn't cry.

Crying is for the weak, a gruff angered voice violently whispered in my head, It never does anyone good.

I flinched at the voice and stared unseeingly at the white door waiting for the doctor to return with some results. We weren't allowed back yet because we weren't family or something. When the nurse at the front desk explained that to us I sensed it as bullshit and stomped off to sit down totall pissed off.

They didn't see her like I did when I walked in. They didn't see the almost lifeless body sprawled across the bottom steps of our shared house. They didn't run to her with heavy breathes as they called 911 demanding an ambulance with such fierceness that it could destroy an army. They didn't see the empty beer bottles, the bloody knives, the cuts, the drugs, and the barely rising chest.

They didn't see how broken and sad this girl was.

They didn't see Leah Clearwater.

We sat there for what felt like hours but was only a mere 5 minutes in time. I guess when your in the mix of a crisis time seems to move slowly and your heart thumps louder with every tick of the clock. All was quiet except the defeaning sound of each of our hearts. They thumped because they were grieving. They thumped because of the sickening atmosphere.

They thumped because they were scared.

Our attention was momentarily drawn while a group of tall, tanned, and buff men came rushing through the door, behind them two women, two really pale people and a little girl, and a man in a wheelchair. The swiftly made it to the counter the women speaking fast.

"I got a call from her- saying that my daughter Leah was here." Our heads snap up and we all watched the scene before us. "We need to see her."

"Ma'am we cannot let you in." She said irritated.

"Thats my daughter in there!"

"I understand but you need to wait till I'm ready to escort you back."

What kind of fuckery is this? What a selfish bitch!

I get up and storm angrily towards the counter. I slam my fist so hard on the granite that it made a sound that nearly passed as thunder. The nurse jumped with a squeak.

"Listen bitch! I am sick and tired of you fucking shit! This is my best friends mother! My best friend who was fucking lying on the bottom step basically dead and so help me if you don't let the mother of that child back there, I will personally kick your skinny, pale ass!" I growled and hissed and bitched as loud as I could. I didn't give a shit if I was making a scene.

"Listen, I understand that you are going through an emotional time-"

"Fucking whore! You don't know what a emotional time is! You are a spoiled barbie skank who doesn't give a damn! Get Leah's mom back there now before I rip your-"

I felt arms wrap around my waist and thats when I realized I jumped on the counter to get into her face. I was furious. I felt heat rolling off of me in waves and I was sure if I didn't get out of here I'd burn the nurses ass off.

"Dia, that is enough." Sean pulled me away and I stuggled against him.

"No! I'm not going to let the wanna be nurse take away time from Leah's mom!" I shouted. His grip just tighted as he took me outside Byrce following behind.

When they looked at me they way they did. I finally did feel like crying.

But I didn't.

Crying is for the weak.