My friend Ellie and I decided we were bored of normal fan fic so this is our take on harry potter we do hope you enjoy but we do love hp
nd sadly we dnt own the characters
Harry looked at the plate of cold dog food that had been set in front of him at the table by his mean, horse faced Aunt Petunia and picked up a fork. Ever the long-suffering hero, he heaved a dramatic (and frankly unnecessary, because it was very high quality dog food) sigh and with an expression of noble fortitude, began to eat.
As he forced down the chunks of meaty sustenance that Lay on his plate he began to remember his days at Hogwarts which seemed so far away……
"Oi, Potter, you smell" remarked Malfoy wittily as he passed his table in the dining hall
"Yes, I think it's quite a manly scent, don't you, my love?" asked Harry dreamily, imagining himself pouring chocolate over Malfoy's naked body
"ummm NO really Potter, No I don't." as he dreamed the same dream
"Just kidding, see ya later, sexy" Malfoy purred, strutting off to his equally sexy Slytherin pals. Harry watched his ass sashay off appreciatively and turned his attention back to Hermione's very boring conversation.
"Blah blah blah……homework…..blah blah blah" she bleated……
Ah yes, those were the days.
A few days later Harry dragged his oh so heavy bag onto Platform 9 and ¾. Well, when I say dragged, I mean he pushed it on a convenient trolley. He huffed and he puffed and his face turned a nice shade of red as he heaved his bag onto the Hogwart express. His bag wasn't actually that heavy as earlier in the day Harry had found a very convenient spell, which meant he no longer had to ask for help from Hermione when carrying his bag. But one has to put on a show for ones adoring public, doesn't one?
Harry gave his bad to an adoring first year and strolled into his compartment which had been specially made for him an all his needs. So it also contained a very large king sized bed for him and his many sexual partners. Hermione and Ron sat on the edge of the bed.
"Bigger that last year." Ron remarked
"Well I got more girls this year and there all up for it. Me and you buddy you in?" Harry questioned
"Ron don't answer that I thought I was the only girl for you?" Hermione snapped
" Yes dear but well,(dramatic pause) I need someone to fill well, (another dramatic pause) my more shallower needs."
"Or twelve someones" agreed Harry. Ron nodded sagely.
"Ok," said Hermione reluctantly "But I get first go on Malfoy then"
both boys open their mouths to complain