AN: I own nothing.
Just a moment
One peculiar passing moment...
-A Moment in the Woods, Into the Woods
Shivering, Hazel Amell rubbed one arm with another, attempting to still the chill that was coming from somewhere deep inside her. The Tower was on its way to being restored but, despite everything, it frightened her to see what had once been her home turned into such a thing.
A twig snapped behind her and she looked up sharply, the hints of a spell on her fingertips. Alistair froze, just as startled to see her as she was to see him. Letting her guard drop slightly, she turned back towards the stream she had seated herself near.
"Most of the time when you say you need some time alone you're out destroying some defenseless tree," he commented wryly.
Hazel didn't respond, only hunched further into herself.
"Are you cold?" he came forward and knelt down near her. She tensed and stared at him. "I won't hurt you," he said before shrugging his cape off his shoulders and wrapping around her. The cape-like coat was warm from his body-heat and she found herself burrowing into its folds.
"Thank you," she murmured unsure if he could even hear her.
Alistair nodded before sitting next to her. "Are you all right?" Hazel glanced at him with an unreadable expression. "I mean, it couldn't have been easy, to see your home like that,"
"The Mage Tower wasn't my home," her words were curter than she had intended and Alistair looked like a scolded boy. "Home is a place where you feel safe," she looked away her voice thickening. "And loved," she shivered. "The Tower was just a place I lived in,"
Mutely he nodded, surprisingly understanding about it.
"Do you think," she started and then stopped, not fully willing to continue her thought.
"Not usually no," Alistair's amusing comment caused a light smile to grace her lips.
Taking a breath she looked her companion in the eye. "Do you think that Cullen will hate mages forever?" Alistair blinked. "I mean, after what those Blood Mages did," she shuddered, a movement Alistair mistook for another shiver and sidled closer to her in an attempt to share his warmth with her. "I can't exactly blame him, I hate the idea too."
"Does it matter?" he asked quietly. "Cullen will be relieved of his duty until it is deemed he is fit to serve again,"
Hazel played with a piece of grass. "Cullen was always kinder to the mages." She bit her lip. "To me," Alistair frowned. "Being a mage in the tower is difficult and many grow to resent Templars. Cullen was different," she shrugged lightly. "He showed me that not all Templars reveal in the idea of killing mages; he showed me the logic the chantry has about magic and the control necessary for it. I may not agree with a lot of it but it helped to understand."
"Not to mention his crush on you," Alistair seemed to be trying to make a joke but his voice sounded harder than normal, almost resentful in its tone.
"It was always rumored in the tower," Hazel leaned back into the tree, unconsciously scooting closer to Alistair for the heat he provided. "Other than study, gossip is the main function everyone loves to take part in," she snorted in disgust. "It didn't help that most of my time was spent with males,"
"Secret meetings behind the shelves," Alistair wagged his eyebrows suggestively but his smile did not reach his eyes.
Hazel laughed despite herself and nudged him playfully. "No." she swallowed hard. "My best friend was Jowan, an apprentice who had been then for about a year before I was brought. He kind of took me in and, being a young boy, thought every other girl in the tower had cooties."
"You mean you didn't?"
Shaking her head, Hazel found her smile staying longer. "Honestly most of the girls were really weird, complaining about their appearance, some would spend hours in front of the vanities before they let anyone see them." she made a face. "We had one robe color to wear, three robes, and a cloak if we got cold. It wasn't as if we could have a lot of variation."
Alistair chuckled. "Somehow I have a hard time imagining you like that,"
"No," Hazel glanced at him. "I couldn't care less." Pulling the cloak tighter around her, she wished it would warm the coldness she felt inside. "I never thought this would be my life," she whispered. "A year ago I had just passed my Harrowing, I was the First Enchanter's apprentice. I hadn't been off the island since I was child. Apprentices are rarely allowed out and even when they are it's under heavy guard. I'd never been anywhere that I did not know there was a Templar within ten feet." She felt detached, as though her life before was nothing but a dream. "Everyone thought that I would take Irving's place when he passed. That of all the mages in the Tower, I could be the best,"
"Some would say you've become something even better,"
Closing her eyes, she frowned. "But how did I get here? I helped my best friend destroy his phylactery only to learn he betrayed me."
"What do you mean?"
Looking at him, Hazel found herself lost in his rich brown eyes. "He taught himself blood magic. My best friend, a man I thought of as a brother, and I didn't even notice!" Blinking back the tears, she bowed her head. "The world is falling apart around me and I'm not sure if I can stop it."
"What he did, it's not your fault," Alistair tried to comfort.
"Isn't it?" Hazel picked at a patched spot on the cape. "The Circle, the place I've lived all my life destroyed itself; maleficar pouring out like puss from a wound. It had been festering even while I was there and I never noticed. How am I supposed to lead, to stop the darkspawn, when I never saw what was happening?"
A hand covered hers, heat enveloping her cold hand. She followed the arm up to his face, something stirring in her chest at the look Alistair was giving her. "You learn from it. Hazel, you're one of the most amazing people I've ever met." She blushed. "You barely became a Warden when everything got dumped on our shoulders but you've kept going, you keep fighting. I was useless after Ostagar, I could barely think straight but you, you knew what we had to do, decided on an action and took it."
Hazel swallowed hard. Alistair reached forward and tucked a stray strand of hair behind her ear, his hand caressing her cheek for a brief moment before pulling back.
"Don't lose hope now," his words sounded more like he was begging her than trying to convince her.
Leaning her head on his shoulder, Hazel was amazed at how comfortable it felt for him to wrap his arm around her. "I haven't lost hope, Alistair," she closed her eyes. "I just," Hazel sighed. "I just wish things could be different,"
"Yeah, I have wishes like that," Alistair grinned. "I once wished all the darkspawn would spontaneously combust," She snorted. "But if there were no darkspawn you and I never would have met,"
Hazel felt her stomach drop. "We could have," her voice was quiet. "Only you'd be watching to insure I don't turn into an abomination,"
His grip around her tightened. "For what it's worth, I prefer it this way,"
Closing her eyes, Hazel smiled. "At least this way there's no looming threat of you killing me,"
"No." he agreed resolutely. "Definitely no killing you," He shook his head. "Kissing you on the other hand,"
Hazel sat up abruptly and looked at him. "What?"
A blush spread across his cheeks. "Oh nothing," Quickly Alistair got to his feet. "Is that dinner burning?" She stared after him, bemused. He was really a very strange man.
