Loss

(A/N Some emails inspired me to write not one, not two, but three fanfics today. Thank you, Anita, Shahrukhlover and ChocolateIsMyDrug! I probably won't write this much in the future though. School starting next week.)

I gazed with tearless eyes at the flames, licking all over the wood covering my wife's body. Even while seeing her lifeless body cremated, I couldn't believe she was gone. Even now, I could feel her touch my shoulder, I saw her face smiling at me from every corner.

She was always so full of life. Sophisticated, but always smiling and laughing. I was absolutely crazy about her. My beautiful, young wife Tina. I half-smiled as the memory of our wedding came back to me.

We were sitting beside each other, in front of the bald priest mumbling along in a dead language, when I tapped her shoulder and asked, "Will you be my friend?" And she had warned me with her eyes to stop, but just a few minutes later, she did the same thing.

It was so hard, so, so hard to believe she didn't exist anymore. Yet, I knew it had happened. She had died in front of me, in my arms, after giving me my daughter. I still blamed myself bitterly. She should have told me there would be complications with her delivery. She had sacrificed herself for the little baby.

Anjali. That's what she wanted to name the baby. It had been her last request. But every time I said that name, heard that name, my heart ached horribly. Anjali had been my friend, my best friend in college. But she had left halfway through the year to take care of her sick father. And we had never heard from her since.

When Anjali had left, Tina had been my comfort. Sometimes, when we were together, she filled in for Anjali's absence. Even if she did never play basketball. Now, Tina was gone forever. And my heart was left with two holes.

I couldn't cry, not even as the smoke stung my eyes. I had no one left for me, who could comfort me, make me laugh, share my sorrow. My mother was still alive, of course, the dear soul. She had taken the baby – Anjali – back with her. But still, she was my mother. Not my friend. Not my love.

I sighed. I had been out here long enough. I went back home. I was going to my room, when I saw the door of the baby's room ajar. I stepped in. My mother was lying on the bed, sound asleep. Poor her. She must be worn out.

I looked at the baby lying in her cot. When my face came into view, she started babbling and cooing. I bent down lower. I could hardly believe this was my child.

One of her flailing, dimpled, baby wrists caught the side of my nose, and I jerked back, startled. Seeing my reaction, she smiled, truly smiled for the first time, her lips stretching wide over her toothless gums. I found a smile breaking over my face as well. Anjali. It fit. My daughter, Anjali. My best friend.

(A/N I personally love the ending. I'm not so sure about the title, though. It was either this or Two Holes. Which do you think is better? I have another idea for a fanfic, but this time for a Lily/James fanfic. My first non-KKHH fanfic. But the original idea isn't mine, so I need permission before using it. I also might write some DDLJ fanfic soon. Gotta think of some ideas, though.)