An: I know I really should write another chapter and finish the other oneshot its just... this one begged to be written!

Disclaimer: iCarly ownership is not in anyway associated with my name.

Carly's Bad Day

Carly Shay put her math book down with a yawn. She had been out for a week with the flu and had to go in early. It was 10:30, she had to get up at 5:30 to take a pop quiz Mr. Howard had given during her absence. She turned off the lights and climbed into bed instantly falling asleep.

"GNNNNNNNNEEEEEEEEERRRRRRRRRRRRRRR" A loud buzzing noise filled Carly's brain jolting her out of sleep mode instantly. The buzzing stopped just as suddenly as it had started. The quiet was almost deafening. Only to be stopped by another more blasting sound.

"You! You! You two!

Get up and face me

You both know that your guilty

Now I'm saying what needs to be said

Just for you! You! You two!

You know what your games did

I've got eyes that can see

All those secrets you two hid

From each other

From your sister and mother.

But you suck at lying

And you know you never could

You! You! You Two!"

Spencer's favorite song blasted through Carly's brain in absolute clarity. It was a song she secretly felt described her two best friends. Then the gnering sound joined in masking the words. Shaking her head to try to clear her brain as she forced her eyes open only to be greeted by more dark. Extremely confused as to why the sun wasn't shining she looked at her alarm clock positioned across the room. It was 1:07.

She sat for a moment still waking up. Her brain was in a fog and she seemed unable to register the time or even think with all the noise and lack of sleep. Finally a good 5 minutes later her brain was able to come up with the thought of going downstairs and asking Spencer "What in the world are you doing with a gner making noise thing and listening to music at loud volumes? It is sleepy time and a school night!"

Carly pushed the covers off and zombied her way to the top of the stairs. She than tripped and glared her way down to the landing. The noise only increasing with every step. She closed her eyes trying to adjust to the sudden light. When she opened them she looked to were her couch should have been. Instead of their nice, sturdy orange couch she saw Spencer shaking from the Jack hammer he was currently using on a very large sculpture thing. She surveyed the rest of the scene to see pretty much every power tool they owned littering the floor.

Her eyes turned back to Spencer glaring at him. Spencer was very accustomed to glares. He could sense them a mile away, it had to be all those years of Sam practically living with them. He quickly turned of the jack hammer and turned down the music sending her an apologetic look.

"Oh I'm sorry Carls. I didn't mean to wake you it's just I was inspired and you know the gnering sound irritates me." He shot her a look that clearly said please understand.

Carly sighed, nodded and then turned to trip back up the stairs. She knew that if he stopped now he would never finish whatever he was doing. He was just so easily distracted. Carly climbed back into bed staring at the clock waiting for Spencer to turn of the power tools. At around 4:54 Carly was given the gift of silence. She immediately closed her eyes and fell into a wonderful deep sleep.

The last thing Carly remembered was a peppy cola fountain and Edwin Collins leaning forward to kiss her while a really annoying buzzing noise in the back round. Carly's eyes opened the second she realized what the buzzing noise was. She looked at the clock. 6:00 she had to be at school by 6:30.

The alarm clock had been buzzing for half an hour. Carly jumped out of bed and ran down stairs heading straight for the kitchen. Studies showed that the key to doing well was getting a good nights sleep and a good breakfast. So if she didn't get the sleep she was going to make sure she got the breakfast.

As she opened the fridge door her eyes rested on a mostly empty fridge. (Well condiments, fish oil, an empty apple juice, and a few bones left over from some form of meat.) She checked the cabinets finding only 8 boxes of jello powder, Sam's favorite plastic ham, salt, moldy bread and olive juice. So no food and no sleep. Carly was not a happy camper.

At least I can take a 5 minute shower. Carly turned the hot water knob and nothing came out. She closed her eyes and held her breath as she checked the cold water nob. When no sound of rushing water came out she opened her eyes hoping she had gone deaf. She had no such luck, " Damn, SPENCER!" She waited a minute for a response. All that could be heard was her breathing. It appears that Spencer was in a post mega awesome sculpture coma. She closed her eyes took a deep breath in and got changed for school.

Now as the author of this story I feel that it is important to say that Carly without a shower is a very unhappy Carly. A Carly without a shower is a scary Carly. No one messes with an unbathed Carly, not even Sam. On with the story.

When she went to pull on her favorite shirt to cheer herself up. She realized that Spencer had shrunk it when he had done the laundry last. Sighing in defeat she picked another shirt and headed downstairs. She couldn't help but think that Spencer's sculpture had better be the best damn sculpture he has every done.

Instead of the wonderful piece of artwork that would make her feel forgiving. She all she saw was her favorite pink glitter bra straps from her "helping" bra. He was using them to hold together two rusty gross old dirty pulleys. Her bra straps! A clap of thunder and lightning from outside broke her gaze off her bra straps stuck in his sculpture.

She had to walk to school that morning due to Spencer's post Coma gaze. One day Sam and Carly had timed the walk to or from school and came to a sad conclusion. It was proven fact that you could walk faster than Mrs. Benson could drive. So there was no way Carly was going to ask Mrs. Benson to drive her. I know what about the bus?

Well, she did try to take the bus that day. Only she realized it was going the wrong way about 2 blocks in. When she tried to get up from her seat she couldn't. Her butt was practically glued to the seat by a very large, aggravating piece of gum. It took her another block to stand up. She had to run to school only to be stopped by a hobo party blocking the sidewalk. She barely made it with less then a minute to spare. Sliding into the classroom breathing heavily she sat down and Mr. Howard handed her the test.

She wrote her name on the top and read the first question. Unable to answer it she went on to the next. About 5 questions in she realized she had studied the wrong chapter. That week of never putting her math book down had done absolutely nothing for her.

Carly walked out of the room after handing in her test. She had guessed all but 7 of the answers. It was a 50 question long quiz. When she got to her locker she was blessed with the much appreciated sight of her two best friends arguing. (Sarcasm if you didn't catch that.) The bell rang signaling it was Freddie's turn to drag Sam off to class. If she skipped anymore she wouldn't be passing. Once her ears were finally free from the bickering and bell ringing she felt the need to create some more noise.

Carly stood their slamming her locker over and over again until she finally felt better. With one final slam she turned to go to class only to be stopped by a teacher. He gave her detention for being in the hall without a hall pass and then another when he figured out she was the one slamming the lockers.

I now your thinking oh the rest of her day had to get better I mean how many more detentions could she get? I'll tell you, two. One for being late to class, the other for falling asleep in class. She kept dropping things and had difficulty concentrating. When lunch time rolled around Carly was immensely relieved. Until she checked her wallet and pulled out $1.37 in change. She bought a juice and gave what was left over to Sam.

Of course she wasn't able to actually drink the juice. Instead she spilled it all over that really cute guy from science class. The cute boy that caught her drooling later in the day when she received her fourth detention. Sam and Freddie just would not take a break from bickering. It was like a nonstop bickerfest.

When she got home all she wanted to do was take a long, relaxing shower. After all she was going to the movies tonight! Before she could even enter the bathroom Spencer informed her that he might have accidentally used a few of the water pipes in his sculpture and the water wouldn't be working for about 2 days.

You would think that this would be the straw to break the Carly's back. Nope, it wasn't. She sighed and couldn't help but think she should have seen this coming. For someone with a normally awesome life her day had been going incredibly crappy.

Now low and behold who would they run into on the ticket line but Neville Pappermen and 2 of his "Friends". Now Carly really wanted to see this movie Caught Between Day And Night. (It was a Vampire movie based on the very popular best selling book series.) So when it came their time to but the tickets after waiting 2 hours in line. Sam and Freddie whining about going to go see such a stupid movie. Freddie was saying something about wasting his money on 2 tickets knowing Sam wasn't going to pay for hers and the constant taunting of Neville wasn't helping any. She also had to skip dinner for this. Those 2 hours had to be taken from some were.

When it was finally her turn to buy her much awaited pass into the room that would bring her much beloved and fantasized Edwin to life. The only good thing about the whole stupid day. "One ticket to Between Day and Night please!" She was bopping slightly in what looked like the potty dance but was really the excited Carly dance beaming at the ticket person.

Only to have a soon to be very scared and apologetic ticket person say, "I'm sorry but the boy in front of you just bought the last four tickets." Now Freddie has always thought that the scariest Carly Shay has ever been was when they didn't tell her about the first fire escape kiss. That boy soon had a much scarier memory to replace it with.

When Carly heard those last three words. "Last four tickets" Carly snapped. When this narrator says snapped she really means snapped.

Carly's first reaction was shock. Then when it sank in and the ticket person repeated themselves it was rage. Pure, livid and surpassing any rage Sam has ever shown. She turned to were Neville was standing not to far off. He handed the popcorn and goodies to his goonies; smirking and laughing calling out "You can have these three for a kiss upon thine ruby red lips!" Waving his tickets in a very foolish fashion.

The only response the stupid boy would get was a very animalistic and terrifying roar from Carly who proceeded to launch herself at the boy nails with nails poised and a face displaying her inner emotions. Neville didn't even have time for it to register.

He was tackled to the ground and Carly was soon trying to claw his eyes out. Of course the clawing out of the eyes was after grabbing the tickets and shoving them down her shirt for safety. All the time ranting about her day. Neville was screeching and covering his eyes. Begging for her to "Spare his beautiful face." (His words not mine) At first the cohost and tech producer just stood in shock. Sam's hands wrapped around Freddie's neck, Freddie's hands on hers stalled in their attempt to pull the blondes hands away.

The second Carly started to rant about them they seemed to snap out of it. They exchanged glances communicating on what action to take. Sam quickly went to retrieve the host of iCarly while Freddie recorded the whole thing. Freddie would have probably just gotten in the way. Sam turned to the camera and said, "And this, dear iCarly viewers, is why you never, never, never, never tick Carly Shay off."

As Sam held the very crazy looking Carly back you could hear her pleas. "Let me at his eyes! That's all I want! His stupid, Between Day and Night last ticket buying, horrible, nub eyes! I swear after that I'll leave him alone!"

Freddie was normally a very intelligent boy. Yet he still felt it was okay to say to Sam, "Sam it's all your fault. Your horrible violent influence has led Carly too insanity." Prompting a fight to break out between the two. Carly was instantly distracted from a now very lucky arch nemesis who still had his eyes in his head.

"No! I Can't take it anymore the constant fighting and step back taking. You finally got over me and all you can do is think about Sam. Don't even try to deny it or talk back mister!" She shot him a look that said you can't fool me! "Sam your so madly in love with you don't know what to do with yourself. I could handle the fighting and name calling and physical abuse if I knew you too were together! But you're not so I can't! Get over yourselves and just make out already! The sexual tension is driving me mad!"

She fished two tickets out and shoved them into Freddie's hands. She took a moment to stare the two of them down before continuing. "Here are your movie tickets! Freddie, might I add free movie tickets! Now you'll have enough to buy Sam food. Now go on your god damn first date already! I don't want to see or even hear the two of you until after the movie!'

With that Carly grabbed a popcorn and some other goodies from Neville's "friends" and stormed away. She disappeared through the movie theater doors intent on seeing her Edwin admit his everlasting love to another girl (she always felt looked just a little bit like her) on the large silver screen.

Freddie and Sam linked hands and did as they were told without a second thought.

AN: See aren't you glad I wrote it! This turned out so well and it just flew from my brain through my fingers. Seriously it was super easy to write and enjoy writing. I just hope you enjoyed it as much as I did. That's really all I have to say. I'm proud of it and I enjoyed writing it. I hope you enjoy it too.

I'm Outtie!

unicornsrock5