Training was useful. It distracted her mind. It held her focus. It kept her sharp. She pushed her body until her muscles screamed. Exhaustion was her goal. The deeper she slept the less chance the thoughts would creep into her head. Thoughts of that day. When she had made a choice that would forever haunt her.

She knew she was right. She knew she had the high ground, that she had made the right decision for everyone involved. So why did something in the pit of her stomach feel wrong? And why couldn't she stop thinking about him?

Him. The enemy, turned conspirator. The man who consumed her dreams both good and bad. The man whose soft use of the word 'please' in such stark contrast with his dark intentions, had made her want to accept his outstretched hand. She knew she shouldn't think of him. Yet she couldn't escape those eyes. She knew those eyes so well now. She saw what he hid behind them. Need, desire, hope. She had felt his anticipation for her answer that day and had been shocked by the discovery that part of her had wanted to accept him.

Part of her still wanted to accept now, but her loyalty to the alliance held her steady. She felt welcomed and loved by them all, but the abilities she displayed which continued to grow, were beginning to make her see she was not one of them. It appeared that people still couldn't help but deify the Jedi. Whispers followed her footsteps. She caught sweeping glances of awe and wonder directed at her. Leia has noted with pride that she was becoming something like a living legend. Rey knew she didn't want that. It was a lonely undesirable existence.

Most of the rebels were too awestruck to talk to her, and her friends were so busy now that their numbers were so few, they often could not be spared from their duties to spend time with her. Rey struggled to find her place amongst them.

She felt the force around her like a cool breeze. It wanted in. She tried to keep it at bay. She knew the force would lead her to him. She felt their bond swirl around her like a brewing storm. She wasn't ready. She didn't feel strong enough yet. She worked on the broken saber day and night, hoping it could be salvaged and wishing desperately that by fixing its smashed up parts, she could also be restored to her former ignorant self. When everything was simpler and less complicated and she didn't have any knowledge of the man with a heart full of darkness but eyes full of longing.

Kylo threw a datapad clear across his quarters. He had read the same line fifty times. Stop it. He told himself. Just stop thinking about her. His brain did not comply. Since the defeat the pressure he was under was suffocating. Hux was breathing down his neck hard and he knew he had to show he was worthy to lead, worthy of his new title. That meant no distractions. Complete control. But his mind would not let him rest. Image after image of Rey played in his mind like a faded holo reel. Kylo sat on the bed with his head in his hands. He has to forget the little scavenger. It was the only way.

The planet they were hiding out in was rich with vegetation and Rey couldn't get enough. One day, she found a clearing, green and lush, where trees shielded her from view and tiny little creatures the colour of rusted meta coils with large eyes and bushy tails, ran around curious about their new visitor. She sat cross legged on the grass enjoying the warmth of the two suns. She felt a calm settle over her, and for the first time in weeks she let her guard down.

Kylo has been called to a meeting to discuss dwindling support from the first orders investors since the 'incident.' Hux was passionately explaining his plans for future funding avenues, mainly organised around his own self-interests of course. Kylo was bored and it showed. He didn't care for this side of war. Talking had never been his strong point. He was a closer with a saber not a contract. His temper bubbled. Just as he was about to force push Hux into a wall, his eye was drawn by a shard of light glimmering on the back of his hand. It felt warm. Then he heard a soft sigh. His heartbeat quickened. He would know that voice anywhere. When he looked up, his surroundings has morphed, he was surrounded by trees and he squinted as the planets suns beat down on him. His eyes focused on a shape sitting on the grass a few feet away was him. It was Rey. She had her back to him. He watched her shoulders rise and fall gently then stop suddenly. Kylo straightened up and prepared for a fight.

Rey felt a shiver down her spine. Someone was watching her, and here she was without her staff. Stupid. She had left herself completely exposed. She turned slowly, and her eyes widened as they met Ben's. He looked so out of place, completely dressed in black amongst the greenery. He stuck out like a sore thumb. She almost laughed. A thousand thoughts ran through her mind but not one word left her mouth. They stared at each other. She could felt his confusion, it was as strong as her own. Rey stood and took a step towards him. Then another. Then another. Until she was so close she could reach out her hand and touch him. Part of her wanted to. The part that was still intrigued by his offer. Her hand twitched at her side. Kylo didn't move. She realised that there was so much to say but neither of them wanted a fight that day, and so the silence between them grew.

Kylo had never felt more conflicted. Part of him wanted to end her life once and for all and end his suffering, the other part... well it had others ideas how they could end their war. As she walked towards him, he couldn't help but noticed how graceful her moves were, but by far her most interesting feature was her eyes, they were almost hypnotic. She held him prisoner with her gaze. Moments passed. It occurred to him that one of them should speak. He tried to formulate a sentence but his thoughts refused to form anything comprehensible. What on earth could the last Jedi and the Jedi killer have in common besides neglected childhoods? Before he could muster anything eligible, she faded away and he was once again looking at Hux who in comparison with his last view, was a rather unpleasant sight.

Rey looked from side to side. He was gone and she realised with surprise that she was disappointed. Despite their differences she knew they both recognised there was a kinship between them. Something that linked them to one another, be it loneliness, their sensitivity to the force, the heavy weight of responsibility which rested on both their shoulders, or maybe all of the above. She had so many questions she wanted to ask him, now that Luke was gone she was fully aware she needed someone to guide her. Could he be that someone? She shook her head. It was ridiculous to speculate. They were on different sides of a galactic war for goodness sake. As divergent as night and day. Yet she still felt the pull towards him even as she worked hard to build a mental wall between them.

Kylo left the meeting, shooting Hux a look which conveyed a threat should he choose to pursue the issue. Hux wisely decided to ignore Kylo's absence. He headed straight for the training room. He destroyed battle droid after battle droid but still he remained uneasy. The exercise helped to exhaust his muscles but his mind remained entangled in her.

That night, Rey found it hard to sleep. She tossed and turned until at last she gave up and moved to her desk where the remains of her lightsaber lay. She quickly became engrossed in her work, now that salvaging wasn't a way of life, it had become a comforting familiar hobby.

'You don't want to do that.'

The deep voice that came from behind her made her jump. She fought hard to make sure her voice appeared unaffected.

'I don't remember asking for your opinion.'

'Fine. Go ahead. It will be interesting to see if I survive the explosion.'

She hesitated, then gave in. 'Okay. You win.'

She put the pieces down and turned in her chair to face him. He was standing by her bunk with his hands clasped behind his back. Such a formal stance. In her small quarters he looked like a giant and she suppressed a grin.

I can hear your thoughts Rey, so go ahead and smile.

Rey felt startled. Then curious. She reached out with her mind.

Yes, you can hear mine too.

She felt Ben's voice resonate in her mind. She noted his deep tone vibrated in her head in a soothing way.

'I'm glad you are enjoying this.' Ben drawled, seemingly simultaneously amused and irritated.

Rey reprimanded herself for being too free with her thoughts.

'Can't you stop this from happening?'

'Apparently not.'

'Shouldn't the link have severed by now if Snoke was the one cultivated it? He has been gone so long.'

Ben shrugged, 'No one truly fully understands the force. Snoke probably didn't really understand what he was doing when he connected us or perhaps he did, but he wouldn't have spared a thought for our discomfort.'

Rey sighed, 'I guess I'm stuck with you.'

'From my point of view, it is I who is stuck with you.'

Rey rolled her eyes. Then chewed her lip as a thought occurred to her.

'Could you fix this?' She motioned to the saber.

Ben regarding it carefully, 'perhaps...'

Rey's eyes lit up. Ben tried not to let it affect him...and failed miserably.

'Could you teach me how?' The hopeful tinge in her voice was annoyingly endearing. Ben considered her request. What was the harm? It seemed the link between them wasn't going away anytime soon, what else were they going to do? Sit in silence? Kill each other? It also pained him somewhat to see the heirloom in such a state of disrepair. He was curious to see if it could be restored. He told himself that was all he was curious about. Though he knew it be a falsehood.

'I will try.' Ben replied and was rewarded with a surprised smile from Rey. It made him feel...well, it made him feel. The thought occurred to him that this arrangement was probably a dangerous mistake, but it was one he didn't seem able to circumvent.

'No.'
'No.'
'No. Rey. Pay attention.'

Rey slammed the parts in her hands down on the table. She glared at Ben.

'You're not explaining it well enough!'

'You aren't listening.'

'I am listening!'

'I beg to differ.'

Rey threw a screwdriver at Ben's head. He casually moved his head to the side as it flew past his ear and looked unimpressed.

'Really?'

'Stop infuriating me.'

'I'm trying to help you, though I'm really struggling to understand what my reasons were for agreeing to that. You are being less than appreciative.'

Rey huffed, 'I do appreciate it. It's just that, I don't understand why I can't do this.'

'You can, everything takes practice.'

'This is what I do Ben, I fix things, I've never had to learn before, usually it just comes to me. I feel like I'm out of my depth.'

Rey pouted and Ben tried not to imagine capturing her full bottom lip between his teeth. Get a grip. He told himself roughly.

'You're not. This is your depth Rey. The force is strong with you. You just haven't benefited from the training I have received. This is complex technology. Jedi's build sabers and maintain them throughout their lifespan. It's a very personal experience.'

He placed his hand on his own saber and gently caressed it. Rey watched his hand and tried not to imagine it caressing her skin instead.

'Ben...'

He wished she wouldn't say his name so softly. It sounded so...intimate... it stirred something inside of him.

'What was it like for you?'

'What?'

'Growing up. With Leia and Han and Luke. With your family.'

'I don't consider them my family Rey. They held me back. They were afraid of my true potential. They wanted me dead rather than allow me to reach it.'

'That's not true...'

'You know very little of my past Rey. Do not pretend to understand my upbringing. I don't pretend to understand yours.'

Rey looked away, 'I'm sorry. I shouldn't have brought it up. I suppose I was just curious. I've never had anyone to call family.'

'Sometimes that can be a blessing.' Ben offered by way of comfort.

'Trust me. It wasn't. Can you imagine living on Jakku and being a vulnerable little girl, I've had to fight and struggle everyday of my life. Even as a young girl I had to learn to defend myself against men twice my size...'

Ben suddenly stood, his hands balled into fists at his side. His eyes blazed,

'Tell me their names.'

'It's not important now...'

'I will have them killed. Disgusting cowards like that do not deserve to breathe.'

'Please calm down. I'm fine. So really you do not need to worry.'

Though she wished he would control his temper part of her was touched that he wanted to defend her honour.

'Thank you for caring though. No one on Jakku ever came to my aid.'

Ben collected himself and sat back down.

'The pathetic people of Jakku didn't realise your worth Rey. You have so much potential locked inside of you. All you need to do is let go of your previous self and become who you are truly meant to be.'

'What? Dark like you? I know in my heart that is not my path.'

'We shall see.'

'Do you mean to try and seduce me?' Rey asked half serious, half playful.

Ben's head filled with images. Oh he would like to seduce her, but not in the way she was thinking. He hoped she hadn't picked up on his thoughts.

'No. You would see through me. I think in time, you will come to me willingly.'

Rey felt her cheeks flush. If only he knew how tempting that sounded to her. To give in to Ben. To submit to him. Okay this was dangerous. She pulled her thoughts into safer territory.

'I don't think we will ever agree on that front Ben.'

'I think you will come to see that my way is superior.'

'Your way is more violent. All we want is peace.'

'Peace cannot be achieved without some blood shed.'

'Spoken like a true war monger.'

'You forget your place Scavenger.'

'You forget your manners Ben.'

They glared at each other. The air around them crackled with fury and arousal. Both of them felt it, but neither acknowledged it.

Ben turned his head.

'Hux is here. I have to go.'

'Oh say hi from me.' Rey taunted.

Ben shook his head, 'hysterical Rey really.'

Once she was alone, Rey took a deep breath and tried to calm her erratic heart. Every moment they spent together seemed to intensify the connection between them. It was equal parts frightening and thrilling.

That night when she slept, she dreamed of Ben stroking a gloved hand down her neck as he had stroked his sabers hilt.

'Give in.' He whispered into her ear.

She woke panting hard with sweat beads forming on her skin. Her body tingled with lust. Was she playing with fire by allowing Ben into her life? She wondered how much longer she would be able to resist her growing attraction to him.

Ben retired late that night and fell into a deep sleep. His thoughts were consumed with images of Rey's delicate throat and jaw and the feel of her smooth skin against his gloved hand. When he woke he was sure he caught a hint of her lingering scent in the air, and though it was gone within a moment, he felt his manhood harden in response.

Back to back meetings and so much still to learn. Kylo worried he was in over his head. Hux smirked at him from across the table, wallowing in his element. Kylo gripped his thighs under the table. He wanted to leave. He wanted to train. He wanted time to think about Rey. He wondered what she was doing at that moment. Was she training? Was she meditating? He forced him mind back to the meeting. Decisions needed to be made. Money needed to be raised. War was expensive and time consuming. Do you want this? He heard a voice that sounded suspiciously like Rey's in his head. He pushed it aside. This was his choice. It was the only choice he had.

Rey practised manoeuvres with her staff, swiping at invisible enemies and trying to increase her speed to match her ability with the lightsaber. She couldn't help but miss the feel of the powerful weapon in her hand, like an extension of her own body. She thought about Kylo's saber, as wild and unpredictable as it's owner. Focus Rey. She told herself. But it was hard not to remember those fierce eyes during battle, and then the look he has gave her as he had walked towards her...she could only describe it as hun...

'If you lean on your right foot you will be able to balance easier.'

Kylo's voice shocked her from her thoughts,

'What?' She asked, still startled.

'If you lean more to the right, it will improve your balance and give you more power behind your swing. Should I show you?'

Before Rey could respond kylo walked towards her and stood with his chest against her back, he reached forward and held her staff with his hands pushed up against her own.

'Lean on your right leg.'

Rey did as she was instructed and tried not to think about the warm feeling of his chest against her back or the gentle scrap of his gloved hands against her bare skin.

'Now we swing, like this.'

Kylo moved the saber in her hands. She had to concede it was a more natural move for her.

'You're welcome.' Kylo answered her thoughts then moved away before his body betrayed him through their close proximity.

He had to admit that this compliant, obedient Rey appealed to him.

'Don't you see how counterproductive it is teaching your sworn enemy better fighting techniques?' Rey said.

Kylo snorted, 'If you were going to kill me you would have done it by now.'

'Maybe I'm lulling you into a false sense of security.' She suggested.

'Maybe...or maybe there is another reason for your hesitation.' Kylo said. Then without taking his eyes from hers he rubbed his gloved fingers on his neck. 'Had any interesting dreams recently?' He enquired.

Rey blushed furiously and turned away from him. How did he know about her dream? Unless he has really been... oh god. Rey shook the thought away and focused on practising the new move he had taught her.

'My dreams are none of your business Ren.'

'Agree to disagree.' Kylo said calmly.

'Why are you here?' Rey asked. Feeling vulnerable and awkward.

'I don't know. I was in my quarters preparing for a meeting, and then I found myself here observing your flawed training techniques.'

'My techniques are fine Kylo, as you may recall from the times I've brought you to your knees.'

Kylo pursed his lips and Rey tried and failed not to notice.

'Luck and a slight influx of force power in your favour won you that fight, scavenger. Plus, you will remember I was quite badly injured prior.'

'Yes, as I recall you were quite badly injured during as well.'

Kylo growled under his breath which sent a shiver down Rey's spine. Suddenly he appeared in front of Rey so close she could feel his warm breath on her face. He grabbed her staff and threw it to the ground.

'If you want a rematch. I am at your disposal little Jedi.'

'Name the time and place.'

'You don't have the guts to face me again now I'm fully recovered.'

'Try me.'

They stared at each other, both able to feel each other's pulses racing as well as their own. Their chests rising and falling rapidly. They searched each other's eyes for some time. Rey caught her lip between her teeth and Kylo's eyes tracked the movement. Hungry. She thought involuntarily. Was it her imagination or had the temperature suddenly risen? She turned her back to Kylo and tried to collect her thoughts. When she turned back, he was gone and Rey fell to the grass as her knees suddenly went weak. She wiped the back of her hand across her forehead then fanned her face. Why did Kylo's visits always leave her feeling so confused and so...dissatisfied?

Kylo stood back in his own quarters. Frustration flowed through his veins and he punched the wall to alleviate the pressure. He felt calmer once he felt the searing pain travel through his knuckles on impact. He took a deep breath and ran a hand through his hair. He had wanted to put his hand around Rey's throat and squeeze just enough to make her gasp, then he had wanted to press his lips to hers and claim the sound as his own. He had been right. The meetings between them were dangerous.

Rey lived in fear of someone finding out about the connection between Kylo and herself. She knew her friends wouldn't understand, mainly because she didn't truly understand herself. Why did they continue to be bonded? Why couldn't they break it? And why did she feel like she would miss him if they were separated? The only thing she knew for sure was that their situation was very complicated.

She knew that Ben still resided within Kylo, but she didn't know if he would ever be strong enough to become dominant once more, and if that happened what happened to Kylo? Would he remain trapped within Ben? Would be cease to be? She found both those ideas unsettling. As much as she wished Ben would return to the light, she found that the idea of loosing Kylo completely, made that scenario unappealing to her.

Maybe it was because she found Kylo so challenging. He goaded her into pushing herself harder than she has before. Under his tutorage she was could become a much improved fighter. She just wished she had a saber to practice with. They were still trying to salvage her broken saber but it was looking more and more unlikely. There were parts she needed she had little chance of finding without visiting some obscure trading posts and putting herself in danger of being discovered in the process. She still hasn't disclosed her location to Kylo. There were some topics of discussion they both knew to stay away from, one of which was their growing attraction to one another.

Rey had to admit that the way he had looked at her the other day had made her feel something. She didn't have much experience with the opposite sex but she believed what she has felt was arousal. Heat had flooded her body and her heart had thumped wildly in her chest. She knew he wanted to kiss her. She has felt his desire radiating from him. It has felt intoxicating and overwhelming. If she hadn't turned away... but she had and she was embarrassed to admit her reason. Not because she knew kissing Kylo was wrong, not because she didn't want to, but simply because she has never kissed anyone before and she was afraid that her inexperience would diminish his opinion of her. 'How's that for a dysfunctional relationship?' She muttered to herself. She didn't want to loose face in the face of her mortal enemy. Oh, and she wanted to kiss him. Badly. She threw herself onto her bed head down. What a mess she had gotten herself into.

The bond was strengthening. He could sense her thinking about him. He felt a pull towards her, but resisted. He hasn't visited her since their heated discussion though he badly wanted to. He wasn't sure how they could continue with their disjointed friendship. He had no doubt she has felt his desire to kiss her. The thought made him grit his teeth with anger. He had revealed a weakness to his enemy. An unforgivable mistake and worse still, her reaction had been to turn away from him. She didn't feel the same desire for him. She had rejected him. He was pathetic. Kylo felt disgusted with himself and worst of all, he still wanted to kiss her despite her reaction to him. He could feel his arousal straining against his pants when he remembered the feel of her back leaning against his chest, and the feel of her hips brushing him as she had adjusted her footing. Frustration and embarrassment fuelled his growing anger. He needed to destroy something.

'Sir,' Hux's voice came over the intercom. 'We have ships approaching. They aren't responding to hails. We suspect they are scavengers looking for abandoned ships to strip. Shall we let them pass?' Kylo smirked. Excellent timing. 'No. i'm on my way.' He responded.

Rey had been avoiding Leia for sometime. She was worried that she would see right through her to her connection to Kylo and put her into quarantine or worse exile her. So when Leia summoned her, she couldn't calm her thoughts. She paced the floor of her small quarters. Why did she want to see her? Did she already know? Was she going to punish her? What was the punishment for cavorting with the enemy?

Kylo chucked in her head. Cavorting? Is that what you call it. Rey closed her eyes. She turned around slowly to find Kylo sitting on her bed.

'I'm not in the mood for this. Your mother has requested my presence.'

Kylo straightened, 'and you are worried that she knows about us.' He has annoyingly plucked the information from her mind, but Rey let it go this time.

'Yes.' Rey sat on the bed next to Kylo. 'Do you think it likely?'

Kylo stared at the small space in between their knees. 'I don't know. It's possible. She can wield the force, but it depends, there is a lot to consider. I doubt something like this would be on her radar unless, did you tell her about our previous discussions?'

'No. They seemed too...private.'

Kylo raised an eyebrow at her but did not press the issue.

'Then I would think not.'

Rey released the breath she had been holding suddenly feeling calmer. 'Okay. Thank You.'

'You're welcome.'

She looked at Kylo and smiled. He was still looking down. His face looked strained. She frowned and followed his eyes, it was only then that she realised she had placed her hand on top of his. For a moment, she just looked at her hand touching his. Her hand was so small and slightly tanned, his in contrast was large and pale and warm. She could almost feel his blood flowing through it.

She glanced sideways at Kylo, he still wouldn't meet her eyes.

'You should go.' He said swallowing hard.

Rey nodded and stood up. She reached for the door handle and turned just as she was about to leave, but he has already disappeared.